My fundie Republican neighbor is praying that Israel attacks Iran before Bush leaves office

[NNN0LHI]

He has convinced himself it will happen. He says its his prophecy.

This is the same good old boy who was constantly trying to recruit me into his church right after he moved here and I finally had to tell him to fuck off before he would stop doing it.

He did finally admit today that his wife voted for Obama though.

I already knew she had. We had talked about it without her doofus husband around before the election.

Don

[Demobrat]

1. Let him pray if it makes him feel good.

It's not like it will actually influence events in any way.

[gratuitous]

2. Write it down

Date it, have him countersign it. Then, January 21, bring it out and ask him why in the world he would "pray" for the unnecessary deaths of so many thousands of people. Just for a political thrill? Is that the sort of thing Jesus would pray for? Somewhere between "give us this day" and "deliver us from evil" I'm thinking.

[NNN0LHI]

3. He was all for invading Afghanistan and Iraq too

I reminded him of that today and asked what we have accomplished by doing that besides breaking our self financially.

He just stared into space.

Don

[gratuitous]

4. That's why you should get it in writing

I'm sure that in his own mind, he doesn't remember being favor of the invasions of Afghanistan or Iraq, or if he does remember that he was for those invasions, the reasons are lost in the deep recesses of his mind. In this case, we're talking about less than two months, and if he countersigns what you've written down, he won't be staring off into space; maybe his brain will actually flicker on for a moment or two. Watch for a glimmer of comprehension accompanied by a very faint whiff of ozone.

[TlalocW]

5. On January 21, 2009

Go over to his house with the Bible open to Deuteronomy 18:20-22, which concerns how to tell someone is a false prophet (pretty straight-forward actually - if they something is going to happen, and it doesn't, they're false prophets). Tell him that he gets a five minute head start before the rest of his church show up with stones.

I believe those are my favorite Bible verses just because they can be applied to just about every big name in the religious right, and you can use them against Jehovah Witnesses.

TlalocW

[notadmblnd]

7. I was just looking it up.

Deuteronomy 18 v 20

. 20 But a prophet who presumes to speak in my name anything I have not commanded him to say, or a prophet who speaks in the name of other gods, must be put to death.”

21 You may say to yourselves, “How can we know when a message has not been spoken by the LORD ?” 22 If what a prophet proclaims in the name of the LORD does not take place or come true, that is a message the LORD has not spoken. That prophet has spoken presumptuously. Do not be afraid of him.

Jeremiah 14:14
Then the LORD said to me, “The prophets are prophesying lies in my name. I have not sent them or appointed them or spoken to them. They are prophesying to you false visions, divinations, idolatries and the delusions of their own minds.

[liberalmuse]

6. Your fundie neighbor needs to enlist.

Enough of this shit. I want to see every single one of these these warmongering assholes in uniform. If you can stick a flag or yellow ribbon on your car, you can hold a gun in the Middle East.

[BadgerKid]

8. George Carlin - The more devout someone is...

the more likely that murder is negotiable.

[PurityOfEssence]

11. Nietzsche: After coming into contact with a religious man I always feel I must wash my hands.

So, is your neighbor breeding red cattle, too?

[Sarah Ibarruri]

9. Is he a Bible whacko? nt

[Boojatta]

10. Did he build a shrine to Saddam Hussein?

Saddam Hussein attacked Iran.

(Also, Marge Simpson and the kids built a shrine to Lenny.)

[RagAss]

12. Where have you gone Jim Jones, our nation turns it's lonely eyes to you !!!!!

Please God....send one huge vat of motherfucking kool-aide and take these assholes out!!!

[Warpy]

13. Doofus thinks if there's another world war

it'll knock Jebus off his heavenly throne to come back to earth like he was supposed to do 2000 years ago before the 12 apostles all croaked and save all the doofuses so they can look down on us from heaven while we're incinerated in the war they started.

Doofus, if Jebus is 2000 years late and the holocausts of the last thousand years haven't kicked him off his throne, nothing you do will.