GEORGE BAILEY A SUICIDE AFTER FED REJECTS BAILOUT FOR BUILDING & LOAN

[ThisThreadIsSatire]

The sudden, tragic end of a banking icon sent shudders through a shocked nation yesterday as the depth of the current mortgage crisis hit home, even to millions who have so far been unaffected.

... After receiving the news that the Building & Loan would not be allocated any emergency funding from the $700 billion set aside by the Federal government, Mr. Bailey reportedly jumped off of a local bridge into the frigid river below. His lifeless body was discovered some time later, ironically by local sheriff Bert Steward, III whose grandfather, ‘Officer Bert’ Steward (portrayed by Ward Bond in the Capra film) once helped to rescue Bailey from a similar attempt.

“Unfortunately, nobody was there to intervene this time,” Bailey’s daughter Zuzu told reporters through a family spokesman. “This time, the bell will be ringing for daddy.”

... “George Bailey was a hero to millions,” an emotional (Treasury Secretary Henry) Paulson told reporters upon hearing of the suicide, “And for me, his loss is a particularly personal one. George was also my best imaginary childhood friend. While his presence will be missed, I am comforted by the fact that our friendship will always endure. Of course at a time like this our thoughts and prayers go out to his family and all those who were close to him - especially the ones who are about to lose their homes.”


Read Full Story: http://thedesperateblogger.wordpress.com/2008/12/13/george-bailey-a-suicide-after-fed-rejects-bailout-for-building-loan/

[Mabus]

1. A mid-day K&R

[acmavm]

2. Recommended. Puts a new slant on that story.

[robertpaulsen]

3. I prefer the alternate satire where Bailey goes postal on Mr. Potter.

It's more emotionally satisfying. ;)

[hfojvt]

4. SNL did that in a skit

with the Master Thespian playing Potter. Uncle Billy comes into the final scene and goes "Hey, I just remembered where I put the money. It was in the newspaper that I gave to Potter." and George goes "well, what are we waiting for, let's get him!"

They also did the bank run scene on the SNL crisis. Bailey says "You are looking at this all wrong. The money's not here. It's in your pool, Senator, it's in your trip to Europe." and then Senator Alan Cranston rolls in as Potter, not really the Senator, but a cast member playing the Senator.

[robertpaulsen]

5. That's a classic, with George tossing the ragdoll Mr. Potter.

But I never saw the Alan Cranston/Potter sketch. Sounds great.

[ProfessorGAC]

6. That Was Great

Thanks for posting that link. That was just precious!
GAC