I'm being worked to death this year

[Honeycombe8]

A Vent on the state of the economy and in general.

I'm sitting here upset and on verge of tears, having just dropped off my two rescue dogs at a kennel. They have some separation issues, since they were abandoned previously. Plus, the place was hot, and the crates smaller than I'd hoped, and the place crowded (this being vacation month, I guess). I'd left them there before, but it wasn't crowded or hot. This time, my dogs were clearly upset.

Why did I leave them there? I'm in TX, and I have to go to NY again for work for a week. Just like a couple of months ago. And I will have to go again several times this year. And in between those trips, we are working most weekends, and some very long days.

I live alone, have no family nearby, and have to leave my house unattended. I am naturally concerned about burglars, fires, broken pipes, etc. Once a year for vacation is one thing, but this much travel is not what I bargained for.

We've had two layoffs this year, and those of us who are left are being worked to death. I am over 50 years old; it's doubtful I can get another job, even though I have a stable, respectable work history (I've been at my firm for over 20 years).

Don't get me wrong; I'm glad I still have a job. I'm glad I work for a stable, profitable firm. I'm glad my bosses have gotten some new, big cases (I work at a law firm). But I am just so tired, and all this travel is so hard on me and my dogs. I have no life except work. No time to make repairs at my old house. And I hate leaving my dogs.

When the economy gets better, maybe I'll have a chance at getting another job. I don't know...does anyone ever want to hire a middle aged person? Or maybe the travel will lighten up. That's a lot of maybe's.

When politicians say that elections have consequences, they are speaking about the Supreme Court Justice nominations. But elections also have other consequences. If Bush hadn't been elected, the economy would never have tanked like it did. My firm wouldn't have the layoffs, so I wouldn't be worked to death, and I'd have a chance of getting a job somewhere else (even at a pay reduction). Elections do have consequences.

Just feeling sorry for myself. Now I have to go pack.

[Tansy_Gold]

1. I understand completely

Maybe you can talk to your vet or someone about finding an in-home pet sitter. I don't know how expensive that would be compared to the cost of boarding in a kennel. But it might be easier on your dogs.

I have four dogs of my own, all rescues of one sort or another, and they are my only family locally. My housemate will be watching them while I take a much-needed two week vacation the end of this month, but I'm already anxious about being away from them that long.

I think it's a sign of the times that many of us who have jobs feel we're being taken advantage of, and those without jobs woudl take just about anything. That pretty much tells you who's in control of what's left of the economy, and it ain't us workers.


:hug:



Tansy Gold

[Honeycombe8]

20. Thank you and ALL of you for your kind responses and suggestions.

Sometimes it's just helpful to vent, you know? And in some perverse way, it is helpful to be reminded that I am not only not alone in this predicament, but that there are others far worse off.

Yes...the employers are not only really in trouble, but some are taking advantage of the bad economy and treating their workers not too well. I will remember that.

[Tangerine LaBamba]

2. It's rough,

and I feel for your doggies. Maybe you can find another, better place for them next time? I'm sure the season - vacation - has a lot to do with it.

But, in all honesty, I'm having trouble feeling too bad for you, although I really do sympathize.

You have a job. And at a law firm, no less. That's pretty amazing, given the sorry state of law firms these days. Except for the bankruptcy and foreclosure practitioners.

A couple of months ago, an old friend of mine, a Yale law grad with an impeccable professional history, an appellate practitioner, just the most sterling credentials ever, had been with his firm for over twenty years, two kids in grad school, a wonderful marriage, a good life, lots of friends, a valued member of the community where they resided as well as the Washington, DC legal community, was informed that he would be finished at his firm come the end of April.

That was it for him. Two weeks' notice, and clean out his office.

He checked into his office early the next day, a Friday, at 6:30 a.m., according to the surveillance cameras, went up to his office, and died there of a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

The life insurance policy - payable to his wife - that the firm had on him was still in force, having long since passed the incontestability point where it would not have paid off because of suicide. We agreed, his friends, his lawyer friends, that that had to have had a whole lot to do with his decision. It was a very large policy - millions.

I know this is a hell of a place to tell this story, but I want you to know that it's a lot worse for a lot of people, and while I know it feels bad to have to board your dogs in a place that's not to your liking, it's pretty bad for others, too.

Here's hoping your trip goes smoothly, and your return home is quite joyous for you and your family.......................

[Honeycombe8]

28. You make a very good point, Tangerine. I am lucky in some respects, I know.

How sad that story is. What a way to treat someone who had given years to a firm. And what a thing he must've felt he had to do for his family.

It is always helpful to reflect that one's own situation isn't the worst around, and to count one's blessings. Normally, I naturally do that. Something about today and this trip, though, got to me, and I got to that feeling-sorry-for-myself stage. I think it was that the dogs were upset. I have no children; they are my babies, and they had a bad life before I got them. So I promised myself I'd give them a happy life for the rest of their days. It just got to me.

But I guess they'll be fine. The week will pass. I will come home and pick them up and kiss all over 'em and give 'em treats. And I will feel better.

Thanks.

[Tangerine LaBamba]

35. Oh, bless you, Honey,

for taking my post in the spirit in which it was intended.

I in no way meant to minimize your unhappiness, not at all. I was the one who cried whenever I had to leave our Happy with my parents for the Summer - and she was treated like a goddess there, so much so that she didn't want to come back with us - so I do know how upsetting that can be.

So, yeah, you had every reason to be tearful.

But, in the grander scheme, aren't we fortunate? We're still here, and we're stable - or relatively stable - and that's a damn sight better than so many others.

Have a safe trip - I do NOT envy you NY in the summer - and an even safer and happier return................................

[MADem]

3. Do you have any friends at all?

Couldn't a friend come by and walk and feed your dogs? Perhaps you could pay a local kid (child of a friend or neighbor--a good one, they do exist, the trick is to know one) to come by and sort out the animals for you? Perhaps that would be easier on the dogs as well as you.

When I had to go on travel and was away from family, I had to put my dogs in a kennel/doggie day-n-night care arrangement. However, it was an incredible place with play time, and group play, and a pool...like a dog hotel. The dogs would claw to get out of the car and head for the door without their leashes, and when I went to pick 'em up, they'd be like reluctant little kids being told to leave the playground...talk about feeling shitty, taking them home!

[Jane Austin]

6. The problem in Texas right now is the heat.

Not only would it be expensive to air condition a house for your dogs in 100+ degree heat, but if there were a brown-out or other power failure it could get fatally hot pretty quickly for dogs left alone at home.

They will be monitored and supervised at a kennel, at least.

[MADem]

9. Yes, that is certainly a consideration. We don't have those kinds of

temperature extremes normally in my neck of the woods. Even in a power outage in the dead of winter, where it can get pretty doggone cold, dogs can make do with a good bed made out of old sleeping bags, or something.

You'd really need a house/dog sitter if there's a danger of power outage.

[Honeycombe8]

21. Yes, we've had triple digit heat the last several weeks. It's deadly hot. Good news is..

that the heat, starting today, is letting up. So I am grateful that the highs next week will be unseasonably cool (88 to 94 or thereabouts, I think).

I'm having a/c trouble, too. But I think I fixed it (it was the thermostat, but I had fixed it a few days again, and again, it stopped, so I'll see when I get back).

[Liberal_in_LA]

4. Heard on news yesterday: 40% of people want to change jobs, 70% of under 30 because of this issue

when economy gets bad, remaining staff is overworked, so everyone is unhappy at work these days. So you aren't alone. Hang in there.

:hi:

[lunatica]

5. I hear you loud and clear

I have a job where the only other person doing what I do (because it's too much work for one person) is being laid off at the end of August. I'll be left to do the heavy work of two people which is impossible because my part of the job is all I can manage in the allotted time. On top of that we are all being furloughed starting in September. I can't even look forward to retiring ever because I've had to use my retirement to take care of my mother who has dementia.

I did have my son move in with us and he takes care of my mother while I'm at work.

Maybe you could rent out a room to a college student or something who could take care of the dogs while your gone. I think the days of in taking boarders are going to come back.

[abumbyanyothername]

7. There has to be an alternative.

I am 50+ and essentially out of work, so I am forced to brainstorming an alternative to the work like hell to sink more slowly routine.

So far, I have come up with one that works for me, but not for my wife.

[Honeycombe8]

22. Do you mind if I ask you what alternative you found? Starting your own

business or something?

[abumbyanyothername]

29. The alternative I found for me? That my wife won't accept?

Downsizing. Almost everyone could downsize to somewhere.

In our case, we have some equity in the home we own. We could move to an ordinary part of the world, in an ordinary sized home, and have a few years to gather our thoughts. Meanwhile, I could grow most of what we needed for food.

Not acceptable to my west-LA born and bred wife. (Of course, one of the places I had in mind was the community in which I was born, back in Iowa.)

I look around for employment (I'm in the law business too) but my heart isn't really in it and it shows.

[Honeycombe8]

33. Well, I like your plan, if I do say so myself!

I can see why your wife isn't for it. But your plan sounds creative and solves the problem at the same time. Plus not working in an office might be a nice way of life for a few years.

(Easy for me to say, living and working in the big city like I do. But I didn't always.)

[alsame]

8. When I was young and was a renter who couldn't have dogs, I used

to offer to dog/house sit for my coworkers when they traveled and vacationed. It fulfilled the emptiness I felt being dog-less at the time and it provided peace of mind for the dog owners. They already knew me and were comfortable with me being in their homes. The dogs were not taken out of their home and their normal routines were not disrupted. The house was not left empty and unattended. Win-win for everyone, including the dogs.

Are there any young, single people you work with who might be interested in doing the same? Or young responsible adults who are the children of friends or co-workers?

Believe me, I completely understand your feelings, I've had dogs for most of my life (including now).

Your dogs will be fine :hug:

[stanwyck]

11. Good suggestions. When we leave, one of our daughter's friends

always moves in for the week. Our daughter is in her 20s and she has friends who are either continuing to live at home or are living a lifestyle without as many amenities as we older people have. So, for a week, he or she will take care of our pets, make sure the ordinary household functions are stable...mail, trash pickup, newspaper, etc. In return, high-speed internet connection, cable channels, lawn and housecleaning service, beer and wine in fridge.
Everyone is happy. We tell our neighbors in advance so they don't get suspicious of that young person lounging on the deck with the cats and dogs.

[alsame]

13. Yes, having someone trustworthy stay in the house is the

best case scenario for me too. I hope Honeycombe8 finds someone.

[Honeycombe8]

24. A stocked fridge, internet access, satellite TV...I can provide those things!

Thanks! I forget how it was to be that age and not have a "house" with those things.

[stanwyck]

41. I'm also in a similar work situation as you

I work for a small company and we've lost people through attrition and through laying a couple of people off. We're way too lean these days and way too mean. The rationale is that times are hard, and they are, but I've been at this company for over 15 years and I've had my 4 weeks of vacation cut to 2. Everyone has. And that hurts. Plus, my account list is overwhelming. We no longer have a full-time estimator or traffic manager. Those responsibilities have been dispersed so widely that no one is sure who is keeping up with quotes or checking on the status of proofs. We're a mess.
And the stress is pervasive. We all feel like we work, go home and crash, spend the weekend on household work or more office work, and then start right back Monday am.
And we're the lucky ones.

[Honeycombe8]

23. Thank you so much for your caring response. Several posters have

suggested looking for a student or someone like that to stay at the house.

I'm ashamed to say that that hadn't occurred to me. Only a pet sitter who would drop by, which I thought too risky (theft...dogs need twice a day visits and if the a/c went out in between it'd be bad for them...I've had trouble with "stop-by" pet sitters before).

But I'll check into this. Thanks.:hug:

[alsame]

27. Let us know if you find anyone. And don't worry, the pups

will be fine this week. :-)

[Trocadero]

10. hang in there

I have many times been there when my job was ruining my life. For instance now, I am so busy and so stressed I have gained 40 pounds in the past 18 months. And I am miserable.

[Honeycombe8]

25. Wow. I feel your pain. Gaining weight only adds to the stress, doesn't it?

As for me, I have lost a few pounds, but that's because I went on Weight Watchers. It is sooooo slowwwwwwww. But at least I've gotten a bit physically healthier, which has helped.

It's hard to find time to shop and plan eating when you're really busy.

[tblue37]

12. Find a college student you can trust and hire her to stay in your house.

A quiet, studious girl is your best bet--preferably a grad student. Whenever I leave home, I hire someone to stay with my cats. Students need money, and my cats need attention. When I had a dog, I also hired someone to stay with him.

You need to be very sure of the girl, of coruse, but interviewing her and getting good quality references usually can help. If she is in school for few years, you can have her help for quite a while, and then when she graduates or gets her postgraduate degree, she can recommend someone else.

Sometimes people will have the secretary in our department send out a group email to our grad students looking for a house or pet sitter. It works. Students often need money, and grad students tend not to be wild partiers, especially female grad students.

[Honeycombe8]

26. Others made this suggestion, and it's a great one. Esp. a grad student.

I live in Dallas and have SMU and some other universities in the area. I will check into this.

Thanks!

[tblue37]

40. You can even ask a department--like ours (the English Department)

to send out a group email to their grad students to make the offer. Ours does that all the time.

[ejpoeta]

14. as dubya would say... it's uniquely american... says the guy that spent how much of his

presidency on vacation!! it's a sorry state of affairs. It seems to be the way it is at most work places these days. They laid some folks off and have my husband's job such that if anyone were to get sick or anything they'd be screwed. Barely enough poeple to keep up. But they don't want anyone getting any overtime either.

[OutNow]

15. Worked to Death - not just a trite phrase

At first I thought I was reading a story about myself. I was in my 50s too, lived in Texas, worked for a good company, did not get selected for the layoff. Lived by myself, had to travel to New York and North Carolina frequently - out on Sunday afternoon, back late Friday night. It was impossible to have any local friends or volunteer for a charity, etc. My work was my life. I'd spend all day Saturday doing the laundry, watering the lawn to keep it alive in the hot Texas sun, paying my bills, hoping I had time to get a haircut, etc,

And then the whole thing collapsed. Within a two week period, I could not see well enough to drive my car. I was so weak I couldn't lift my carry-on to put it in the overhead storage. I was in a panic. How could I schedule a doctor visit when I was never at home? I finally had a week with no travel and got in to see my regular doctor who immediately sent me to a ophthalmologist. He spent 10 minutes with me and told me to see the best retinal specialist in town and made an appointment to see him for the next day. After two more doctors and a hurried visit to a neurologist I finally was told I had a severe autoimmune condition and that it is almost always brought on by extreme stress.

My 25 year career was over. Worked to death? No, I'm still here. I have one good eye and take 13 different meds. It was a close call.

I now ask people that have a job situation similar to mine if their job is worth their life. It's not an easy question.

[Honeycombe8]

31. Wow. That is so eerie...that our stories are so similar.

Were you able to "retire," or did you just have to quit and go on unemployment?

Your story really makes me think. And your question really makes the point. But if a person doesn't have a job, what do you do to pay the bills? That's the dilemma.

I am going to give your story and your question a lot of thought. Could be I could work out a plan for the future, and make steps in that direction until the economy improves.

I hope you are doing okay. A coworker was recently diagnosed with lupus, which is a quite serious autoimmune condition, I believe. I hope you're able to get the meds and treatment you need.

Thank you for taking the time to tell me your story. It blew me away, and really gave me some perspective.

[OutNow]

39. work to death - almost

I really tried to keep my job, even with my health problems. The Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) was very helpful. It makes it hard for employers to just fire people when they become ill. Instead, my manager called me in one day and told me to clear out my desk and I would go on disability pay at partial salary. I also qualified for Social Security Disability and Medicare. This, in addition to a major downsizing of my life (as someone else mentioned) has left me OK.

This is important to understand from a political perspective. I have always been a progressive, but I've worked with many right wing assholes who grabbed as much money as possible and bitched when they had to pay taxes. If people with that attitude, i.e. Republican Pigs, had their way there would be no ADA or Social Security or Medicare. For decades I voted for good Democrats like Martin Frost and Lloyd Doggett to help ensure that there was a safety net for the less fortunate in our society. When I needed those programs they were there for me. And I am very grateful.

[NightWatcher]

16. I'm working harder than I probably ever have...for $8 an hour

and I'm damn lucky to have this job. I have college degrees but none of that matters anymore.

If I get my 40 hour week for a year, I'll be making about 16K a year. Where is the poverty line again?

[Lochloosa]

18. Right below you NightWatcher

[SOS]

17. This society is out of balance

Work should not be 16 hours a day, six days a week.
We need time for the other things in life.

But the system is out of whack.

They lay off half the staff, double everyone else's work load, offer no extra money and then tell us we're lucky to not have been selected for financial ruin.
It's awful.

[northernlights]

19. if possible, find a housesitter/petsitter

Studious, female college student -- especially someone in vet tech school -- would be best.

If not possible, try to be relaxed and happy when you drop your dogs off. Hug them, tell them you'll be gone for a week and they're on a vacation, and that you'll be back in no time. Each time you have to leave them and then come back for them, they'll begin to trust that you are coming back for them.

And, yes, be glad you have a job.

If it's at all possible, start planning for your next life. I know it's impossible when you're scrambling to hold on to this one. but that's why I never found a landing spot. I lost my career in high tech post 9/11 at age 48, it's been a mad scramble and nonstop robbery every since. And at 55 am crashing...

[Tim01]

30. I understand your stress. But in this economy........

having a job that sucks might be better than not having a job. I don't have one and can't get one. I will survive, but if I had to have a job to survive I would be fucked. Just fucked. Same thing I hear from everybody right now, no jobs.
Nothing more stressful than going to work every day to a job you hate and want to quit, but can't because you need that job.

[Honeycombe8]

32. You're right, of course.

I would be screwed if I didn't have a job. And many many people would trade places with me.

I am glad to hear that you won't become homeless because of being unemployed. Very glad.

Here's hoping for us all that the economy improves next year.

[gleaner]

34. I'm very sorry that you are having to go through this....

As others have suggested going through a college work office is a good solution for the dogs. You could negotiate a price lower than what you pay the kennel, most likely and your dogs would have the same person with them who would also watch your house.

Another option which I tried when my husband was in the hospital and I was there with him most of the time was to call my vet's office. They have assistants there who are usually looking for extra money and they will feed your animals and play with them. They sent me a young woman who was wonderful to my cats. She didn't have to stay over, because I had to leave the hospital and come home at night. The price was reasonable and I had the extra security of knowing that she recognized sick animals. She even gave them their flea control which is a lot like trying to caress a buzz saw.

In the meantime, keep your hopes up. I'll think of you a lot and hope that your life gets better and easier and that you find a bigger solution to your job issues.

[Skittles]

36. I have a schedule much like yours

it's easier to leave my cats than dogs though

[Joe the Liberal]

37. Dang how hectic.....

I'm sorry you have to go through that, but it should come as no surprise. I read somewhere a while back that Americans work the longest hours among most industrialized countries.

If you lived near me I'd gladly watch over your dogs for you, anyways I hope all goes well for you and your dogs.

[lifesbeautifulmagic]

38. that big coffee company in seattle

recently laid off a bunch of people (mostly over 50's and long termers), and are now working the warehouse roasting plant people 12 hours a day. Everyone is afraid to complain.

I wish issues like this would get more discussion in the national media.