Baby's first cubicle: Most depressing toy ever?

[Auggie]

cnet.com / gizmodo

It's all about expectation management, you see. If you make your kid think he can be president, he will grow up disappointed. Tell him he's headed for a life as an office drone and at least he'll be mentally prepared.

For a mere $2,500, daddy's little office drone gets all of this from Little Tikes' Young Explorer kiddie workstation:

Furniture features:
• Flat desk area
• Left and right built-in mouse pads
• Bench seat that fits two children and offers storage inside for supplies
• Two locking cabinet doors
• Computer wiring stores safely inside ventilated cabinet
• Locking castors keep unit from rolling during use

MORE: http://news.cnet.com/8301-17938_105-20002502-1.html

[Taverner]

1. I think I want to crawl into a corner and die now...

[WeDidIt]

2. That's like straight out of an SNL spoof!

Mutha puss bucket.

[NeedleCast]

3. Must Everything be politicized?

Looks like an educational "toy."

By your defintion, any sort of desk with a computer on it is just preparing the next generation of drones.

Funny, I used to love going to my dad's office as a kid. It was exotic and had a computer and sometimes if he wasn't busy he'd let me play pong on it.

[dionysus]

9. toy stoves and vacuums must really drive them crazy. imagine the fury a GI Joe toy would cause...

[Kalyke]

13. I refuse to get my daughter a toy vacuum.

Really - have we not progressed enough beyond giving little girls vacuum cleaners as toys?

I hate toy stores anymore. The boys side always has imaginative and challenging toys, while the girls side is nothing but pink and purple 1950s housewife garbage.

:puke:

Barf-o-rama.


Edited to add: Case in point

Girls Toys (Pretend Play)

Boys Toys (Pretend Play)

[dionysus]

24. i had a toy lawnmower that blew bubbles. how is that any different.

[jmowreader]

52. Be original. Get your daughter a toy chainsaw!

Or, since the Republicans seem to be hell-bent on destroying the public schools, get her a real one so she can start preparing for her trade as a tree surgeon.

[surrealAmerican]

63. Although it sounds hopelessly mundane, and it is ...

... disturbingly sexist the way these toys are marketed to girls (and not boys), there is nothing inherently wrong with toy cleaning products. Toddlers will try to mimic the activities of the adults in their lives. If they watch you fix things in the house, they will want toy tools; if they watch you clean, they will want their own broom or vacuum.

[Ms. Toad]

67. one of my nephews spent hours with his toy vacuum. n/t

[Name removed]

50. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[dionysus]

60. i used to work in a cubicle. now i have my own office. and i won't get diabetes, cause hey, check

this out.... i go to this thing called the gym.

[Auggie]

31. That's not my definition

It's from the website

[Name removed]

49. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[CBR]

It is depressing. I obviously misspent my youth

pretending to be a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.

[merh]

51. oh come on - is that it?

You only pretended to be a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle?

I can remember pretending to be just about every occupation imaginable. I was the storekeeper, a restaurateur, a gas station owner/attendant, Honey West, a soldier, a spy, an officer person (complete with my own briefcase and stapler), a sheriff, an indian, a female Robin Hood, a female Kung Fo - you name it and at one time or another I pretended that was my job or who I was.

Hell, I even pretended to be a priest and I am a female (not one of the sicko priests) - even as a kid the discrimination made no sense to me. I didn't want to be a nun, I wanted the big show - I wanted to be the one in charge, the priest.

You had to have pretended to be other characters.

[truebrit71]

4. That kid is one lucky bastard..that is WAY bigger then my cube...

..must be middle-management material..

[Initech]

5. Comes with free red stapler, a Bill Lumbergh look-alike, and no cake.

[paulsby]

21. that kid is WAY behind on his TPS reports

he's gonna need to come in on saturday, mmmmm ya

[Initech]

34. What would you say... ya do here?

[JBoy]

6. Hey kid, I believe you have my stapler...

[CTyankee]

14. get a label maker!

[Initech]

19. I was told I could listen to the radio at a reasonable volume from 9-11.

[tridim]

7. Looks like that kid is having a case of the Mondays.

And where is the coffee pot?

[dionysus]

8. oh FFS. toy dump truck "preparing the kid to be a low paid laborer" toy kitchen:

"forcing those little girls into gender prisons"

toy soldier "preparing them to be mindless killers!"

[Kalyke]

18. Toy kitchens are OK.

I wouldn't mind my daughter being a highly-paid, respected chef.

[jmowreader]

54. Whatchu talkin bout Willis, low paid laborer?

You have obviously not seen what dump truck drivers make.

[Godhumor]

10. "Son, I would like to dialogue with you about the present value of your allowance for the next year"

eom

[WinkyDink]

11. Like something from "Dilbert"!

[TheCentepedeShoes]

26. Not complete

without a stuffed Catbert, Evil HR Director

[RaleighNCDUer]

12. Are you kidding?

It's preparing the kid for a lifetime of World of Warcraft!

Parents will regret this when they are trying to dislodge him from their basement in another 20 years.

[marmar]

15. Gotta indoctrinate them to a life of corporate servitude now.....

How about "Baby's First Credit Card Debt"?

[Touchdown]

16. It's not complete without a copy of Xcel on the screen

I HATE that program.

[old mark]

17. Brought to you by the makers of "Baby's First Overdue Bills",

"Baby's First Tyranical Boss", and "Let's Learn About
Lingering Fatal Diseases! - (The Series)".

I somehow remember having few complicated toys, and having lots of fun imagining and making things up...but I'm old, and that was long ago....

Sad.

mark

[NeedleCast]

20. Complicated is subjective

It's high tech, sure, but I'm not sure it's all that complicated.

[nadinbrzezinski]

22. From a social science perspective I am not surprised

kids play with the common instruments of work for their given societies.

In fact, I'd ask what took them so long?

Now would I get that for my nephews? Nope, not in a thousand years.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

23. And this is more depressing than "housewife-y" girl toys... how? -nt

[Berry Cool]

25. Really.

Kids' toys are all about making the grown-up world of work look like fun, instead of the mindless soul-sucking exercise it truly is for most people. This one is no different.

[glowing]

27. I had all kinds of toys.. yet, we always went back time and time again to

the big box the toy came in (it became a fort or little house or some other creative tool), the old pots my grandma gave us along with the rusty shifter (we would treasure hunt by sifting out the dirt/ sand to try to find gold or diamonds). The imagined games and play were the best toys.

[Kat45]

45. Do kids even know how to play like that these days?

It seems that everything is so scheduled and scripted for them today.

[Odin2005]

58. I'm 23 and I did growing up in the 90s.

Then again, I grew up in a rural area.

[glowing]

59. I'm 30 and I grew up in a rural area.. I think the rural area tends to allow

for more imagined play.. I wouldn't let my kid just wander around our sub division... But all kids do imagined play.. Pick up a stick, and then they are pirates or knights..

[TheCentepedeShoes]

28. The desk need a drawer

on the side
Where else is he gonna hide the booze??

[Kahuna]

I gotten many giggles from this thread.. But YOUR comment...

:rofl:

[kitkat65]

29. An even better toy: Malfunctioning fax machine and a baseball bat! n/t

[guitar man]

30. Lol

If they take my little tikes stapler then I'll set the building on fire!!

:rofl:

[jwirr]

32. We tend to solve this gender issue very easily in our family. The 8

great grandchildren play with everything and no one tells them they cannot. We also have a very interesting division of labor - out of the 6 adult families - not one woman is expected to do the cooking - the men are better at it!

[REP]

33. They've had those for girls forever: Suzy Homemaker Ovens

Get back in the kitchen and take off them shoes!

[alfredo]

35. Those wings remind me of blinders.

[undeterred]

36. All he needs are cube neighbors who never shut up all day

and he'll be just like a grownup.

[LeftyMom]

37. $2500? My kid could build himself one hell of a gaming rig with money left over for a new desk.

I know this thing's for the little sprogs, but at that age I just gave him a hand-me-down computer and a chair that lifted up pretty high and had a footrest. :eyes:

[Liberal_in_LA]

43. The price is outrageous

[LeftyMom]

44. I'm in the wrong business.

Seriously, you could shit in a box and sell it to insecure parents, if you marketed it right.

And here I thought $800 strollers and the $150 cloth diaper (just one diaper, seriously) were nuts.

[varelse]

61. +1

it is sad, really, but you're right.

[Dappleganger]

38. At the rate he's going, he'll have his first carpal tunnel surgery by 5.

That'll be a serious bummer!

[Initech]

39. PC load letter? What the fuck does that mean?

[Liberal_in_LA]

40. ha ha. Your thread title made me laugh before I saw the picture.

[Stevenmarc]

41. Son we are sorry to have to tell you we are downsizing.

[Sabriel]

42. "And this button right here is for when the boss is approaching."

"It hides Daddy's pron."

[HughBeaumont]

46. That keyboard looks similar to a Bloomberg . . .

. . . Baby's First Derivative Swap.

[Canuckistanian]

47. Um, yeaaahhhh. I'm gonna just gonna ask you to go ahead and um....

Go peepee in this pot.... Alright? Greaaaaat......

[troubledamerican]

48. PHOTO -- a worse toy

[jmowreader]

53. Here's the most depressing part of THIS whole thing...

For $2500 you can buy an actual office cubicle with a chair, a coffeepot and a PC in it.

[Initech]

56. Skip the cubicle and build a really kick-ass gaming comp instead.

[jmowreader]

57. Well, for YOU maybe...

I have determined through personal observation that World of fucking Warcraft should be listed on DEA's Schedule 1: extreme addiction potential, no known medical use. My wife is a WoW addict and you literally have to walk food into the room she plays WoW in if you want her to eat.

[Starbucks Anarchist]

55. Broken dreams sold separately.

[JHB]

62. I'm thinking anyone who can afford $2500 for a single toy for age 3-7...

...no longer works in an actual cubicle.

[dana_b]

64. not ergonimically correct

look how that future white collar worker is having to raise his arms to access the mouse and keyboard!! That screen is way too high! A definite candidate for carpal tunnel and a workman's comp claim. :P

This "toy" makes me nauseous.

[Octafish]

65. That is ghastly. This is ghostly.

Invoke the spirits of Abu Ghraib this Halloween
with the official Smirking Junior tarp (Electrodes included).

[RagAss]

66. Pardon my French...."Burn that fucking Toy !!"