••• National Cardiac Alert: THE COMING. DUCT TAPE. SHORTAGE •••

[breadandwine]

Baboomp! Baboomp! Baboomp!

You've heard of the TERROR BABIES. You may EVEN have heard of terror GRANDBABIES. Yes! Evil people coming to America, having babies so they can STEAL birth certificates (THAT'S how Obama got HIS no doubt…) and then going back to their countries of ORIGIN and wouldn'tcha KNOW it? In a few generations they are giving birth to

TERROR GREAT GREAT GRANDBABIES!!!!!

But THAT'S not the HALF of it!!!!

NOW.
IT CAN.
BE TOLD.

Former FBI agents who I AM NOT AT LIBERTY TO GIVE THEIR NAMES have disclosed that Osama is sending his agents to America to go into stores ACROSS the country to buy and HOARD UP

ALL.
THE DUCT TAPE.
IN.








AMERICA.






If you don't have duct tape, how you gonna prepare for a terra alert?

Pretty soon… people will be NOTICING that stores are running low.

Pretty SOON… people will be needing to buy more since there isn't enough to go around. In the ensuing chaos it's every man for himself.

PRETTY SOON…
PANIC will set in.

The DUCT TAPE panic.

When the population panics stores will be broken into. There will be

DUCT
TAPE
RIOTS.

Baboomp! Baboomp! Baboomp!

Suddenly Osama's men will be everywhere, fomenting terra, spreading WMDs.

And YOU didn't have:

Your duct tape supplies.

It's coming.

It's in

your HOME STATE.

It's OUTSIDE

YOUR DOOR.


THE DUCT TAPE SHORTAGE.


PROOF THAT OSAMA IS COMING.

Your heart is racing:

Baboomp! Baboomp! Baboomp!

When was the last time you were in a hardware store?
Did it ever occur to you that the duct tape supply was maybe just a LITTLE low? It creeps UP on you when you LEAST expect it. That last roll of duct tape on the shelf is telling you to:

Vote Republican.

YOU need to be CHECKING the proprietor's COUNTRY OF ORIGIN.

Baboomp! Baboomp! Baboomp!

BETTER VOTE REPUBLICAN.
WHILE THERE'S STILL A COUNTRY YOU CAN LIVE IN.

While there's still a state you can come HOME to.
While there's still a TOWN you can come home to.
While there's still a HOUSE you can call your OWN.

The duct tape shortage.
The duct tape CONSPIRACY.

And wouldn't it be just like a DEMOCRAT to make all this happen right before Election Day.

Supms goin on out there.

Supm dogone important.

Not sure what it is.

But ya can't take chances.

Better vote Republican.

Baboomp! Baboomp! Baboomp!

[SpiralHawk]

1. Oh noes. This smacks of a socialist conspiracy.

I sure hope Glenn Chickenhawk Beck (R) will find a way to stir this pot of shit into something.
:sarcasm:

[breadandwine]

2. It IS a socialist conspiracy!

The soshlists get together with the terraists and the minorities and pretty soon COMMUNISM has taken over!!!!!!

[lillypaddle]

3. Link?

just kidding. :P

[breadandwine]

4. Here's the link. This PROVES we must turn to the GOP WHILE THERE'S STILL TIME.

BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LI_Oe-jtgdI&feature=related

[madrchsod]

5. i`d better get to the store cause i need duct tape!

yes i have to tape up the windows because they leak. i`m not afraid of a terrorist attack it`s the electric bill. the heat wave finally broke so i opened the windows a couple of days ago. i just read the heat is coming back this week!

[pipi_k]

6. First they took away our duct tape....then they took away

our underarm deodorant, self-stick envelopes, and "As Seen on TV" microwave spaghetti cookers...


The "rain of terra" is only beginning....


:scared:

[Javaman]

7. They will have to pry my duct tape out of my cold dead hands! nt

[breadandwine]

8. Now yer talkin! Duct tape is a 2nd Amendment right! Can't let the Dems take it away!

...

[breadandwine]

9. Pretty soon they will be stealing our baby powder.

Is there no decency remaining in the Democratic party?

[breadandwine]

10. Protect your CHILDREN! Vote Republican! Before it's too late!!!!

....

[breadandwine]

11. But then there was a terrifying shriek, a bloodcurdling SCREAM....

This can only mean ONE thing.



WE'RE OUT OF TOILET PAPER!!!!!!!



It's all the fault of the Democrats.



Vote Republican.