Our plan to achieve Communist revolution using the 2010 Census is right on track!

[Deep13]

Earlier this month the "health care reform" act transferred all information from medical records to the FBI. Now that the common people are sending our friends in the government details about their personal lives, we will soon have completed the final step in our communist take over. The tracking chips we installed five years ago have allowed us to track all physical movements. We will soon be able to track economic movements of all commoners as well to see what they buy, watch and read. I figure our victory is so near and so certain it is no longer necessary to disguise it with euphemisms like "progressive." I suppose someone might find out simply by googling this subject, but so what. It's too late to stop us now!

Beginning in May, the actual implementation of "Operation Obama" will begin.

May 1: shut down Fox News and Limbaugh using a bureaucratic excuse. Tax evasion, for example.

May 12: send pychological "well-being advisors" door to door to collect Bibles and guns and to pass out impotence pills.

May 20: govt. assumes control of all capitalist institutions. All private bank accounts assumed by the govt.

May 29: return troops from Muslin nations to help suppress America.

June 5: churches required to perform gay weddings and to allow gay recruitment at church

June 11: all law enforcement turned over to UN under Obama family generals from Kenya.

June 20: Rachel Maddow named communications czar for nation.

June 24: execute Limbaugh, Beck and Hannity. Convince O'Reilly to work for us or we shoot his family.

July 4: all private assets tranferred to President Obama--becomes dictator for life! National motto changed to Hail Satan!

Our ultimate goal is here, Comrades. The only thing that could possibly go wrong now is if people evade the census. But we don't need to worry about that since the few real patriots who are telling people not to fill out census forms are being ridiculed by the liberal media.

So keep those census forms coming, you redneck assholes! Hail Satan!

[MidwestTransplant]

1. When do they start taking applications for people who want to work on the Death Panels?

[Deep13]

2. I'll put you touch with someone at the "health" department.

;-)

[kestrel91316]

22. I'm the Director of the Death Department. Send your resume to me.

[Sebastian Doyle]

3. It's not "Hail Satan", it's "Thank You Satan"!

As clearly spoken here by Comrade Obama himself :evilgrin: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jqALdkTArqs

[Deep13]

5. We'll probably need a ruling from the Dept. of Re-Education. nt

[Cha]

4. I read that some people were

not filling out the forms as a protest to govmint..so, they won't get counted and therefore..represented.

Rec.

[Deep13]

6. Well, since it's just us DUers here...

...yeah, a few people have figured out our plans, but the number of people evading the census will be so small, that we expect to be able to round them up anyway. As long as people are not listening to Michelle Bachman and her calls to evade the census, we will be okay. :thumbsup:

[DuckyCase]

24. What are we going to do about Bachman? We can't have great patriots like her...

hanging around.

[Deep13]

30. We've discredited her and her supporters with rumors of insanity.

We'll leave airplane "accidents" to the R.s.

[Change Happens]

7. ROFLMAO.....nt

[Deep13]

10. Yeah, this is just a big joke...I mean it...for real!

;-)

[jwirr]

8. Well at least the war will be over!

[Deep13]

9. Well, with a half-Muslim dictator, it kind of has to be.

:D

[catbyte]

16. bwahahaha

:rofl:

[Canuckistanian]

11. Can I be a General in the War on Christmas?

I've already got several cruise missiles programmed for all the major nativity displays.

Pretty please?

[Deep13]

12. We'll have to ask Bill Ayers when he becomes Secretary of Re-Education.

I'm sure His Excellency will have lucrative positions for everyone who helped him become dictator.

[Hekate]

13. >fretting< Aren't we supposed to be using some sort of code for these missives? >wrings hands<

:hide: :yoiks:

Hekate

[old mark]

14. That WAS the code - the real messages are much worse.......nt

[Deep13]

15. Nah. No one reads DU but our Comrades.

And if the Freepers somehow learn the truth, the liberal media will discredit them.

[florida08]

17. omg

This is so damn funny..am going to print it out. Good job comrade getting the message out.:spray:

[Deep13]

18. Yeah, it's funny because it's just a joke. Yup. Sure is.

:evilgrin:

[Deep13]

19. Oops, someone unrecommended me. Don't worry, comrades...

...even if the RW finds out our real plans, it is too late to stop them. As long as everyone answers the census, we cannot fail!

[KingFlorez]

20. You've ruined all the plans! Curses!

I'll get you for this, just you wait! :rofl:

[Deep13]

21. Nah, one DU post won't stop the Obama oppression machine.

We'll have our Red Summer just like we all planned two years ago. You betchah.

[DuckyCase]

23. Why do we still have churches on June 5? When we take the Bibles, we should outlaw Chistianity.

All families should be broken up, too.

[dixiegrrrrl]

25. Need the churches for the gay weddings, silly.

Do you realize how many million unwed gays there are?

Be a perfect time to start a groom and groom registry business, ya know?

[Deep13]

33. Well, the masses still need their opiates.

After the revolution, we will have an ecclesiastical branch of govt. with "bishops" appointed by the state. The RWers will get their wish as "Christianity" will become mandatory.

[lbrtbell]

26. You must include Keith Olbermann in this somewhere

He's the leftie pundit that they hate more than anything on this earth!

Also, Howard Dean needs to be in charge of the death panels. :rofl:

[Deep13]

31. We're thinking Minister of Propoganda...

...for when we reopen Fox under Obama control.

[Rage Inc.]

27. Excellent!

(evil maniacal laughter)

[verges]

28. Why do you do this?

You know some idiot will see this and believe it! They are not that bright you know!

[Deep13]

32. I really doubt it will prevent anyone from answering the census.

As you say, they're not that bright.

[FlaGranny]

29. Wouldn't it be swell

if no wingnut filled out their census form? They would cease to exist as far as representation goes. I hope them every success. Ain't stupiditity wonnerful?

[Jeff In Milwaukee]

34. Woo Hoo! Umm....Er....Woo Hoo, COMRADE! (nt)

[Deep13]

35. 4/1/10, national Census Day kick.

Where you reside TODAY determines how you answer the census.