Can we please stop with smears against adopted people?

[me b zola]

If someone is a douche, it's not because they were adopted as children, it's because they are a douche. Just stop. Really.

[me b zola]

1. Seriously

Michael Reagan has a lot of reasons to dislike him, do we really need to bring up his adoption to make a point? If so, then no adoptions should be allowed.

[NuclearDem]

2. Eh, what does it matter? He's someone who disagrees with us.

There's no double standard here.

:sarcasm:

[Zephie]

3. I missed something

Is adoption bad now? Since I'm adopted, does that make me a bad person? What happened that I missed?

[me b zola]

6. I was adopted at birth

And I take exception to posters calling out someone that they don't like because they were adopted. This post was, like many times before, a result of someone(s) feeling the need to point out how Michael Reagan was adopted, as though that explains why he is such an insufferable douche.

I'm too old & cranky to let that shit go unanswered.

[Zephie]

7. I'm glad I didn't see it.

I'm adopted as well and aside from my Mother (and Father, rest in peace), the entire family was against adopting me due to adopted children being "damaged goods" and infact even tried to stop the adoption. The whole family is still jackasses to me even now that I'm in my 20s because of my perceived "brokeness" from being an adopted child. I get very pissed when I see people being jerks over the fact that someone is a nonbiological child.

...And at the end of the day, it still hurts.

[Darth_Kitten]

11. Sorry!

I don't care if family members are adopted or not. Family is family, or SHOULD be. :hug:

[vim876]

40. yep

http://www.unshelved.com/2003-10-17

[me b zola]

13. That very thing happened in my family

My parents have both now passed, but they loved me unconditionally. Their family members, not so much. I've always been an "other" to everyone except my parents. This is why my blood pressure goes up when I hear people talking about how wonderful adoption is. My parents were wonderful, not so much the rest of the world.

It is complicated being adopted. Click on my sig line for a good video. I'm always here if you would like to talk. PM me.

[Zephie]

20. I'll take you up on that PMing.

thank you. And the video is beautiful and heartbreaking. I cried.

[me b zola]

22. .

:hug:

I've been looking my entire life. I'm 47 years old.

[poverlay]

18. That is so messed up wrong, & I'm sorry to hear it. I have several adoptees in my extended family

And except for one they're all great. The one ill behaved one is due to my sister's poor parenting. Nothing else. Sounds like you need to tell your negative family members where to stick it. Wish that would actually help!

[jody]

4. Agree. I have a number of grandchildren, some of them adopted, but I don't know or care which.

I love each of them the same.

[me b zola]

19. .

:hug: ==>>>from me & my parents 8>)

[jody]

31. And to you also!

:pals:

[Jamastiene]

5. Adopted people...

are people, just like anyone else. You got the good, the bad, and the ugly. Seems ridiculous to say that being adopted has anything to do with douchebaggery.

I'm not sure what thread or what was said, but I agree. Being adopted doesn't have anything to do with whether someone is a douche or not.

K&R

[me b zola]

15. Thank you for being open minded

Really. We need so much of that now. :hug:

[get the red out]

8. I saw that this morning and I agree with you

Both my nieces are adopted and they are FAMILY, plain and simple. How they turn out will have to do with how my sister and her husband raise their daughters along with personal choices they make.

One son of Ronald Reagan made a choice to take his mind back and think for himself, one did NOT, and chooses to earn a living being a flaming asshole.

[me b zola]

16. Bam! That's exactly it

:applause:

[DainBramaged]

9. What? Jesus is this about early adopters? What about puppies and kittehs?

You can keep your rotary phones.

[me b zola]

14. I don't get the sarcasm on a subject like this

Do you have anything to say about the subject of adoption, and how adoptees are treated differently, or are you just wanting to disrupt?

[DainBramaged]

25. Every day on DU someone is offended by something to the point we are treated like kindergartners

And it becomes a nightmare trying to keep everyone happy. You don't like my reply, put me on ignore, otherwise, I had my say, you can be outraged all you want.

[me b zola]

26. Wow. So you are that uninterested in how more than 4 million Americans feel?

Then why did you bother to respond to the thread? Only to taunt us?

I happen to believe that you are a good a decent human being. But that is not matching up to your response to this thread. Maybe a good time for you to take a "time out".

[DainBramaged]

27. Just stop, tell you what, I'll put you on ignore and save us both the trouble

buh bye.

[NuclearDem]

29. And what benefit exactly do you get by making fun of someone for being adopted?

[DainBramaged]

33. (here we go) I didn't make fun of anyone and if you took it that way your bad!

JUST like the person who started the thread. One day, DU and the people whose hair catches fire every day will get a sense of humor.


Buh Bye

[NuclearDem]

34. You're defending the people who did by saying it's okay for them to

I'm sorry I don't find taking cheap shots at people for being adopted funny.

[Nye Bevan]

10. As with any other broad-brush smear on DU, hit "Alert" and the mods will delete the post (nt)

[me b zola]

12. No, it needs to be called out

Not the post or the poster, but the mentality.

[Gaedel]

17. Same thing with age, personal appearance, or sex

Any physical imperfection gets harped upon no end when DU wants to put down someone on the other side. An example would be Anne Coulter. Disagreeing with her speech or writings is fine, but most of the posted attacks on her relate to her appearance.

[Zephie]

21. I think she's pretty...

On the outside, at least. The inside, not so much...

[Vinnie From Indy]

23. Is this "adoptee" bashing from one idiot poster or is it a larger problem here on DU?

Obviously you have a point about mindlessly bashing adopted people, but is it really something endemic to DU?

I will admit that this is the very first time I have ever heard of this happening.

[me b zola]

24. Well, yes. Its endemic in society

Not in anyway a problem only @ DU. But here it manifest itself most often when speaking about the Reagans. But there have been many other thoughtless posts from otherwise thoughtful posters. But this is not special to DU, it's about how society views & treats adoptees. We are all too often talked about & treated as "others".

[Karia]

28. Thank you and Yes

I'm saddened but not surprised that some of the adoptees who have responded to this had an awful time with extended family and people in general.

When we grew our family through adoption, I knew my extended family would be loving and supportive, as so many are adoptees and/or adoptive parents themselves. Most of our friends have been great too (though a few have been unintentionally hurtful with ignorant comments). What took me by surprise was the extent to which strangers and near-strangers feel entitled to pass judgment on us, make ridiculous assumptions they would never make about families that share DNA, and even be cruel to a child.

[Fleshdancer]

30. You won't hear that kind of crap from me

Adoption is a wonderful and beautiful thing and has nothing to do with one's douche levels. This is obvious due to the sheer amount of douches who weren't adopted.

[KamaAina]

32. Ah, the irony.

Michael Reagan is politically MUCH more like St. Raygun than is his biological son Ron Reagan. This bit of evidence actually favors nurture over nature.

[jody]

35. Perhaps but I remain persuaded by studies finding a person's potential is about 70% genetic. n/t

[BOG PERSON]

36. maybe YOU were adopted

or else you wouldn't be defending adopted people like that.

[Zephie]

38. Are adopted people not worthy of defense?

We tend to get a raw deal that many never hear about.

[me b zola]

42. I am adopted & I don't understand why you believe that we should have to defend ourselves

Are adopted children less than biological children?

[bobbolink]

37. I assume you alerted. That is actually against the rules....bigotry against a group.

Thanks for pointing it out... I will alert if I see it.

[me b zola]

39. No, I didn't

Adoption is a subject that most people, unless they are directly involed, know/understand. We need to discuss this issue, not just tell people to shut up. There are some really wonderful posters here who do not understand, so that tells me that we need to talk about it.

[bobbolink]

41. The rules exist becaue there is a difference between garden variety ignorance, and bigotry.

There is waaay too much bigotry on DU, and if that isn't something that bothers you, then let it slide. But at the same time, understand that it will continue until it is faced.

Most of all, best to you with all of this. I grew up with adopted cousins, and we were free to question and deal with it, and it made a huge difference. I cannot for the life of me understand anyone who feels the need to judge.

[Hello_Kitty]

43. Having people ask me my whole life if I've found my REAL parents is a bit tiresome

My birth parents gave me life but my real parents are the people who raised me.

There's a lot of ignorance about adopted people.

[stranger81]

45. I get exactly the same question, and give exactly the same response.

Adopted by two wonderful people 36 years ago, both of them gone now unfortunately. I feel very fortunate to have had the home and family they gave me.

Anyone who thinks adoptees are abnormal in any way can kiss my adopted ass.

[Fuzz]

44. I'm adopted, and I'm a bastard.

;)

[Capitalocracy]

46. Adopted people are inherently evil.

I stand by that statement.

No, but all kidding aside, I've never heard of any modern discrimination against adopted people. Maybe it's because I come from a place that didn't have a lot of far-right religious nutjobs running around, I bet they're behind this. I don't know, that's just totally crazy. I can't imagine where you would get the idea to discriminate against someone who is adopted.

My dad was adopted. His adoptive mother was not adopted, she grew up in an orphanage. The ones who are adopted (by a good family) are the lucky ones.