World Ends May 21st at 6pm. Be there, or be square.

[FourScore]

Wed Apr 20, 2011 at 10:57 AM PDT
World Ends May 21st at 6pm. Be there, or be square.
by LaFeministaFollow

Woot!!!

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-preacher-warns-end-of-the-world-is-nigh-21-may-around-6pm-to-be-precise-2254139.html

"Blow the trumpet, warn the people!". A fleet of logoed camper vans is touring every state in the nation. "It's getting real close. It's really getting pretty awesome, when you think about it," Mr Camping

Just when they were beginning to get on your nerves our salvation is at hand.

The Rapture is nearly here..

I don't know who is happier, me or them...

He says the world will end on 21 May, because that will be 722,500 days from 1 April AD33, which he believes was the day of the Crucifixion. The figure of 722,500 is important because you get it by multiplying three holy numbers (five, 10 and 17) together twice. "When I found this out, I tell you, it blew my mind," he said.

Praise the lord for pocket calculators

One can but dream...... all the evangelicals gone by May 22nd!

Hallelujah!

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2011/04/20/968687/-World-Ends-May-21stat-6pm-Be-there,-or-be-square

[hatrack]

1. Are they allowing for Daylight Savings Time?

Just asking . . .

[1monster]

44. And the various calander changes? And the strong possibility that Jesus was in

his fifties when crucified if one figures astronomical events (a large, very bright westward bound comet) coincided with his birth as told by the New Testament.

Besides, I was told that the end of the world was on December 21, 2012. I was counting on that extra year and a half. :evilgrin:

[bif]

2. Cool, they'll all be gone the day before my brother's birthday!

[flakey_foont]

3. so I can forgot my next car payment?

kewl!!

[woodsprite]

4. Guess that means I can save the postage on the grad party invite to my inlaws. n/t

[Terry in Austin]

5. Haven't those people raptured yet?

And can I have their stuff when they're gone?

:evilgrin:

[Travelman]

6. Dammit! That just completely screws up

my plans for Memorial Day. And I've already bought hot dogs and charcoal for the grill....

[Richardo]

7. I wonder if he took into account the conversion from the Julian calendar to the Gregorian....

....did he adjust for the 10 days skipped between October 4 and October 15, 1582, when Pope Gregory decreed the change take effect, or did he adjust for the 11 days skipped between September 2 and September 14, 1752, when Britain (and the US colonies) adopted the calendar?

[EstimatedProphet]

10. I'm guessing "no"

[Richardo]

16. Gives us another two weeks then....

...that's a relief.

[Kber]

31. I'm confused. Does that mean that the world is ending 21 days later

or that it ended yesterday?

[jwirr]

41. This guy did not even know those events existed.

[nadinbrzezinski]

58. They did not take into account time zones

and you want them to take into account that catholic pope adjusting the calendar?

Or even less... "You shall not know the time or day of my return..."

[gratuitous]

8. Did they figure in the adjustment to the Gregorian calendar?

Wouldn't it be embarrassing to find out they're several days too early? Also, is that 6 p.m. Daylight Saving or Standard time? Eastern, Central, Mountain or Pacific?

I got questions, dude.

[Brother Buzz]

23. Well , Camping did figure in leap year

The number 5 equals "atonement". Ten is "completeness". Seventeen means "heaven".

Christ hung on the cross April 1, 33 A.D., Now go to April 1 of 2011 A.D., and that's 1,978 years.

Then multiply 1,978 by 365.2422 days - the number of days in each solar year, not to be confused with a calendar year.

April 1 to May 21 encompasses 51 days. Add 51 to the sum of previous multiplication total, and it equals 722,500.

(5 x 10 x 17) x (5 x 10 x 17) = 722,500.

Or put into words: (Atonement x Completeness x Heaven), squared.

:rofl:

[gratuitous]

36. I wonder why squared?

Unless, of course, it's to make it come out right.

Honestly, this is little more than base egotism writ very large. Yeah, all of human history has been leading up to this moment, when you (and you alone!) have figured out the celestial combination to that mysterious lock called God. And, for your diligence in getting it all just right, your reward is great indeed. I guess the good that will come out of it will be the post-event depression, like when Christmas is over. All the wait and anticipation and then it's over in a moment and of course it didn't live up to the inflated expectations.

[lonestarnot]

70. And add the seconds or subtract (can't remember) due to earthquake in Japan?

[Bake]

9. Since they're not going to need it, can I have their stuff?

I'm asking nicely ...

Bake

[jtuck004]

13. We have a front row seat to the biggest estate sale ever! eom

[Bake]

17. I call dibs on the Lexus.

The one I saw the other day. The license plate said "I M BLESSD." Yeah, they won't be needing that one.

:rofl:

Bake

[jtuck004]

20. LOL

[NutmegYankee]

52. No they will.

They aren't going anywhere. ;-) *Ahem* Rich man, possessions, camel through eye of needle, harder to get into heaven than. Oh right, those passages don't matter to them...

[Bake]

72. SSSSHHHHHH!!!!

I've got one on the hook to give me his Benz!! Don't blow this for me!!

:rofl:

Bake

[RebelOne]

11. So, does that mean that I will not have to buy

the wedding present or attend the wedding I was invited to in June?

[MineralMan]

12. The Rupture, Boss! - The Rupture!

And here's the background music: "I'll Fly Away"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vGTOXtJt_2E

[Uben]

14. I'm on the metric system, can you convert?

If you could, break it down to in nan-seconds. I'm trying to modernize my thinking.

[kentuck]

15. I thought Jesus was coming?

I didn't know that the world was going to end? Does one follow the other??

[BobbyBoring]

19. Me too, I'm confused!

i thought JC was coming in May and the end would be in October to allow the 599,999,998,856 of us that "Aren't saved" to suffer for a while before going to hell.

I'll have to change my plans

[Arugula Latte]

22. Aren't we supposed to keep Jesus in our hearts, though?

How do we let him out? Also, will this cause a cardial infarction? ... I'm so confused.

[hootinholler]

33. Nah he's just breathing hard. n/t

[Arugula Latte]

49. But he is risen!

:hide:

[Proud Liberal Dem]

18. Best.birthday.present.ever!!!!

:headbang:

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

21. "On the whole, I'd rather be in Philadelphia.", Purported to be on W.C. Field's gravestone.

[OnlinePoker]

24. So I shouldn't plan to make my Physio and Doctor appointments on the 24th? n/t

[librechik]

25. I'm traveling to Iowa for my mother's 80th birthday that day

She's a devout fundie, maybe she'll save my atheist ass.

[jwirr]

42. You just better hope that while she is being sucked out the door she

grabs you by the hand and takes you with!:evilgrin:

[Wait Wut]

75. !

:spray:

[VWolf]

26. Hmmm. That's my 17-year wedding anniversary.

Someone trying to tell me something?

[conflictgirl]

66. Mine too! Same number of years too.

My husband said "maybe our marriage was the harbinger of doom for the world" and then gave an evil cackle.

[JuniperLea]

27. Damn! They're taking the campers!

I was hoping to pick one up cheap on 5/22/11! I could use a new lantern and stove too... and a new camp cook set!

[Gregorian]

28. Shoot! I made it through five years of math, and never learned about those holy numbers.

Infinite series, Eigen values, inflection points. NO HOLY NUMBERS. This is a travesty of the university system. I demand my tuition back.

Surely they must be confusing prime numbers with holy numbers, and made a typo. 10 was actually supposed to be 11.

[hootinholler]

32. I thought the holy numbers were

6, 8, 9 and 0.

And why wouldn't they include 3? Isn't the trinity a pretty big deal?

:shrug:

-Hoot

[Gregorian]

69. I think the Holy Ghost might be like dividing by zero.

[Initech]

29. Party at my house!!!

[Warpy]

30. May 21, the end of the world. May 22, Earl Scheib.

All those hand painted vehicles are going to be deeply embarrassing to their owners the day after.

[mikeytherat]

34. I've got a lot to do can we move it back 'til the 22nd?

Although if the world ends right at 6:00 p.m., my band might win the award for Best Soundcheck Ever!

mikey_the_rat

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

35. Whew, at least I'll be able to redeem my Groupon for a sushi rodízio before that! -nt

[Armstead]

37. Gee, I thought that was next year?

[slackmaster]

38. I've started offering to buy the homes of 5/21ers for half their market value

;-)

[Skidmore]

39. He's counting from an April Fool's day date???

[jwirr]

40. His mind was blown long before he figured that one out.

[damntexdem]

43. GMT? EDT? Or will it roll around the world by time zone?

Actually, it would have to be the latter so as not to mess with the international dateline.

;-)

[DCKit]

45. On that day, FNC needs to come back from a commercial break to an empty studio...

with piles of clothes on the anchor's chairs.

Best practical joke EVER!

[Motown_Johnny]

46. Tornadoes in the Bible Belt, FIres in Texas, Earthquakes in Utah

God must hate those people....



That does it, God must be a liberal.

[pipi_k]

47. I want to know why God doesn't hate

Massachusetts.

First state to legalize Gay Marriage.


No tornadoes. No wildfires. No earthquakes or tsunami. No locusts or hordes of giant man-eating killer weasels.

Is that his strategy? We're so bad he's just completely ignoring us?

[Arugula Latte]

50. Verily, he hast smitten you

with bad drivers and snarled traffic in Boston.

[pipi_k]

74. Hmmm...you are right...

I had forgotten that, not having been to Boston in nearly 20 years.

But I feel so much better now...God does hate us after all! :7

[Motown_Johnny]

59. I'm saying that God is a liberal

and he/she likes MA.

[handmade34]

48. hmmm

loose interpretation:
``...If they would rather die,...they had better do it, and decrease the surplus population...It's not my business,...Good afternoon, gentlemen!''

[Arugula Latte]

51. The image ... invisible toilet?

[handmade34]

54. ...

:rofl:

I suppose there are those who pray on the toilet

[mzteris]

53. I hope it's really really true

so all those @ssholes will be "raptured" and leave the rest of us alone!!


Of course, it's another delusion. Hey - maybe they'll be so despondent they'll -- (bad bad bad. I'm sorry. That was really bad. . .. but a girl can hope, can't she? The world needs fewer lunatics who believe in imaginary beings and hate everyone who isn't them. )

[bluedigger]

55. Drats! I already paid May's rent!

:banghead:

[ReggieVeggie]

56. (4x12x18)^2 = 746496

and that is significant because it is the number of days since one day in 34 BC

[nadinbrzezinski]

57. Ok 18:00 hours GMT, EST, PST

I mean a girl needs to plan!

[Ahpook]

60. Woo Hoo, thats my birthday

I'm throwing a party. The whole internets is invited:)

[rustydog]

61. DAMMIT! Are you sure? the 21st is my birthday

I guess I'll scale down the party.

[chowder66]

62. ask for gifts early!!!

[Earth_First]

63. Is there a line in Vegas that I can bet on against this happening?

:shrug:

[Wait Wut]

78. Not a bad idea, actually.

Walk up to any of these "true believers" and make a deal.

He's right...you give him your house.
He's wrong...you get his.

Seriously, what do you have to lose?

[Amaya]

64. finally!

:toast: :applause:

[verges]

65. Yes, but if they go....

it means they were right! And we are REALLY screwed!

[quaker bill]

67. 6 pm where?

I need to know if I should plan for dinner.

[kentauros]

68. As I'm not an astronaut on the ISS,

I'm sure I'll be there, Native Terran that I am :P

[Zanzoobar]

71. I think that's my dad's birthday.

I wouldn't doubt it one goddamned bit.

[sarcasmo]

73. May 22nd the new ending dat for the Planet will arrive.

[Wait Wut]

76. On May 22nd...

I will take possession of the state of Arizona, declare myself Queen and welcome you all with open arms! Our new state motto will be, "It smells so much nicer here, now".

[blondeatlast]

79. Ooh, will you excuse my Star Valley speeding ticket then?

It's right around my birthday... ;)

[Wait Wut]

81. Absolutely!

Starting on May 22nd all traffic tickets will be "donations". You will be given a "Request of Donation" instead of a ticket and can send it in with a box checked to designate the charity of your choice. But, only if you think you deserved the RoD.

:)

[blondeatlast]

77. Hell no; I have tickets to Waikiki and Ka'anapali Beach starting the 30th.

If it wants to end while I'm there, I'll go relaxed and happily.

[spanone]

80. i bought a front row seat with my CREDIT CARD....

payment not due till may 22