Wait one minute here.

[sheshe2]

I am not gloating or denying anyone's stress over the vaccine roll out and the difficulty getting a shot.

Yes I got one, finally as of today. It was hell trying to get one. Sure, I got it for me, MA dropped the age requirement to 65+ and those younger with two or more health conditions. I also was panicked to get one as I am one of two that are sole caregivers to my 94 year old mom. Point, my mom is on a WAITING LIST to be vaccinated. A waiting list! I have spent three years trying to keep mom safe, the last one during COVID. The last during COVID has been the most difficult. We go out only for necessity. Fact is we bring it home, mom dies.

I have appreciated all the OPs here on DU. It has given me ideas on how to navigate the system. I have shared my own success with CVS. They actually texted me after I got an appointment to say that 100s of shots were available.

It has given me hope to hear so many have been vaccinated. Why? It is one less person that may spread this disease that has killed more than 500K. I know everyone is scared and as anxious as I was and still am.

Fact. None of us can let our guard down. We are, or should be wearing a mask for a long time to come. I know I will. It is the right thing to do.

Wash your hands. Social distance. WEAR A MASK!

Peace

[leftieNanner]

1. Hang in there She!

My husband was able to register with the state for a vaccination, but who knows when the actual thing will happen. I can register next week.

You are correct about our needing to wear masks for a long time.

Hope you have better luck with getting a shot.

[sheshe2]

4. I got mine today, CVS.

Don't wait for the state. Keep looking on your own.

[leftieNanner]

7. Thanks for the recommendation.

Our county has been pretty low on available doses, but next week, I will get ON IT!

[sheshe2]

9. Good luck!

[onecaliberal]

8. I agree, it's how I found mine.

[sheshe2]

17. +++

[dhol82]

15. I am intrigued. I've been a CVS customer for decades. They don't have the vaccine yet in NYC

Had to sign up for Walgreens since that’s who has the shots. Got one and have an appointment for the second.
Just seems weird that I got my shot through Walgreens.
Also in the database for NYU Langone and Mt. Sinai. Both of them sent me emails saying they have limited supply and go find anybody you can.
It just seems like such a freaking shitshow in this country.
Glad that the current administration seems to have things coming under control but, shit - it’s been a long haul.

[sheshe2]

18. Glad you got your shot.

Yes it is a nightmare as the last A.holes left us high and dry and Biden had to start from scratch.

We are getting there.

[dhol82]

26. Yes. Thankfully.

[onecaliberal]

53. Considering there was nothing in place only a month ago.

There are thousands more coming online daily. It speaks volumes about this administrations commitment to keeping Americans safe. Now with a third vaccine coming online requiring only 1 dose, and regular refrigeration. It’s a game changer.

[sheshe2]

54. If we hadn't won...

We would have nothing at all now. Fact is we have hope and yes, a game changer.

[onecaliberal]

56. There is zero doubt about it.

With all hands on deck standing up the process across the country I think has overall been quite remarkable. We need to be sure we’re vigorously getting to the folks with no transportation, or ability to access appointment online too.

[Ocelot II]

2. Yes, and each person who gets vaccinated will be one less

who could get sick enough to be hospitalized, place another burden on the medical system and staff, and take up a bed that might be needed for someone who has a different medical emergency.

The J&J vaccine was just approved today, and that will make many more vaccinations available soon. The process is accelerating. It's been very frustrating for people whose states don't have enough doses yet or don't have a good process in place, but it will get better. And since we don't really know how long the vaccines' immunity lasts, we will need to keep doing the same things we've been doing all along.

[mcar]

3. Yeah, that was weird.

[sheshe2]

5. IKR?

[In_The_Wind]

6. We plan to continue wearing a mask.

Glad you were able to get vaccinated, sheshe.

[sheshe2]

10. Thanks, ITW.

You all keep safe.

[Hekate]

11. Peace to you too. I was really puzzled by the post that...

....frankly was a pity-party with a surprising number of participants, blaming others for getting something they’re not.

We are all suffering, to a degree. ALL of us. I have been counting my blessings, among them that I am not taking care of an aged parent or trying to teach wiggly kids at home. Even so, I have spent the last year socially isolating and trying to avoid a terrible disease, and it is wearing on me, too.

Until just a few days ago I couldn’t get a shot myself. For awhile I was too old, for awhile I was too young, and the entire time it has been borne in on me that I am not doing anything remotely socially valuable.

What shocked me about “that post” was the air of grievance exposed toward anyone fortunate enough to finally get their vaccination. What was that about? I know I am speaking for a lot of us in saying I have learned a lot from the experiences of my fellow DUers. We are a community. We have shared fears, tears, griefs, and now a sense of coming relief.

If there is one person at fault, it is the malignant and malicious Donald Trump. If there is a group at fault, it is his enablers. Not fellow DUers breathing a sigh of relief.

Hugs to you, sister. Better days are ahead.

[sheshe2]

12. I hear you and agree.

Point in fact, the only reason any of us have a chance to get a shot is because Biden is now in charge. It is his top priority. He can't help that some Governors are effing up the distribution and their cronyism.

Love ya.

[Evolve Dammit]

13. Right on. Thanks.

[marble falls]

14. It's a good plan!

[Larissa]

16. "Wash your hands. Social Distance. WEAR A MASK!"

There is beauty in the simplicity of this message against the menace of a pathogen that has brought the world to its knees. (Sweden is sweating now for having shunned it. The new variant is swift and more contagious.) Do not let down your guard. The variants are on the march. Dr. Fauci caught flak for saying the wearing of masks would likely continue into next year. What's the alternative? The chance of submitting to an induced coma so that a ventilator tube can be snaked down the esophagus?

Sweden readies new measures as COVID-19 cases accelerate

https://sports.yahoo.com/sweden-readies-measures-covid-19-150344280.html

STOCKHOLM (Reuters) - Sweden is preparing new measures to try to curb a resurgence in COVID-19 cases as the coronavirus strain first detected in Britain spreads rapidly, the architect of Sweden's pandemic strategy said on Tuesday.

Sweden has avoided lockdowns throughout the pandemic. But health statistics agency figures on Tuesday showed 10,933 new coronavirus cases had been registered since Friday, a rise from 9,458 in the corresponding period the previous week.

"The British variant is increasing very fast," Chief Epidemiologist Anders Tegnell told a news conference. "This variant will with fairly high probability be the dominant one within a few weeks or a month."

[Ahpook]

19. I am a caregiver for my mother as well

She is finally able to get the vaccine, but want to talk to her doctor before I get her to an appt.

She has dementia, and some of the possible side effects are freaking me out. She is still strong, though. I have her outdoors constantly helping with yard work and she rides the stationary a few days a week.

Maybe I should just get it done?

[GaYellowDawg]

21. I'm in exactly your boat.

I take care of my mother, who has dementia but is physically strong for her age. She had the Pfizer vaccine without any side effects other than a little tenderness the next day, and she decided that working her shoulder would work the soreness out. It did. We’re both excited about her second shot coming up this week.

I’m not eligible for the vaccine yet but when she gets that second shot it will be such a huge relief.

[Ahpook]

28. There is a very good hospital literally across

the street from her doctor's office. I can see the emergency room from their doorstep.

Her doctor said they will be able to vaccinate eventually, but not sure when.

I am so over this!

On edit: I'd actually flip out if something weird happened after her shot. I've made sure for a year now that she does not get infected. I am to young for availability for the vaccine yet... so. We all know how this is!

Her sister had flu like symptoms for a couple days after her shot. I don't know if my mom can handle flu "symptoms" for a day or two. I guess, maybe?

[sheshe2]

23. Yes, just do it, Ahpook.

I am glad, dementia and all that you get her out of the house to enjoy the outdoors for a time. Mom hasn't been outdoors in over a year. She just can't make it that far. She is with it, just weak and aging.

Best to you and your mom.

[Ahpook]

31. To you as well

[Ahpook]

32. We have music nights too :)

Dementia hit her fairly young, but she remembers her loved songs

She'll snap her fingers and remember all the words to these tunes. She is a funny one!

[sheshe2]

39. OMG.

I love you and your mom. You are both way cool.

I know it's not easy to be you.

[Ahpook]

45. Take care of yourself

[sheshe2]

46. You as well.

I did dementia with dad. If you need a shoulder then PM me.

[Ms. Toad]

20. Does your mom live in a different state?

If not - why didn't you grab an appointment for her when you grabbed your own?

[sheshe2]

24. My mother lives with us.

She is 94 years old and hasn't been able to leave the house in over a year. She is in hospice care and 24/7 oxygen. She gets winded just making the trip to the bathroom. I can't just carry her to the car and into an appointment.

Wow. Your tone...implies I grabbed an appointment for myself and not my mother. You don't know me and yet here you are judging me? WTF! My mother is on a waiting list because she is in home care for the past three years and not a priority for those in long care facilities.

Your post to me is insulting and accusatory on a subject that you know nothing about.

Ms. Toad

20. Does your mom live in a different state?

If not - why didn't you grab an appointment for her when you grabbed your own?

[Ms. Toad]

40. You are reading things into the post that are not there.

You got an appointment. You said your mother was on a waiting list (implying able to be vaccinated) & didn't say why you didn't get an appointment for her at the same time.

[sheshe2]

43. No.

I am not reading anything into your post that isn't there.

Read it again.

Yes I got one, finally as of today. It was hell trying to get one. Sure, I got it for me, MA dropped the age requirement to 65+ and those younger with two or more health conditions. I also was panicked to get one as I am one of two that are sole caregivers to my 94 year old mom. Point, my mom is on a WAITING LIST to be vaccinated. A waiting list! I have spent three years trying to keep mom safe, the last one during COVID. The last during COVID has been the most difficult. We go out only for necessity. Fact is we bring it home, mom dies.

[Ms. Toad]

49. You assumed, without basis, that I was making an accusation

rather than that my question was the simple question it was. You said:

Point, my mom is on a WAITING LIST to be vaccinated. A waiting list!

That implies she wants and is capable of being vaccinated. Your post said nothing about why you weren't able to move her off the waiting list to having an appointment.

Especially since you are one of two sole caregivers to your mother, being a sole caregiver doesn't inherently mean you live with your mother, or even live in the same state with your mother. You could easily live just down the street from your mother - close enough to split care for your mother with another caregiver, but still living in a different state. Different states have different rules and processes for getting vaccinations. You're right that I don't know - which is why I asked.

I assume, from your angry response, that she is on a waiting list for someone to come to her home to give it to her - or something of that nature. But you didn't say that.

[sheshe2]

51. Wow.

So off base.

Oh yes, you did make an accusation. I "grabbed" a vaccination for myself and not my mother.

Especially since you are one of two sole caregivers to your mother, being a sole caregiver doesn't inherently mean you live with your mother, or even live in the same state with your mother. You could easily live just down the street from your mother - close enough to split care for your mother with another caregiver, but still living in a different state. Different states have different rules and processes for getting vaccinations. You're right that I don't know - which is why I asked.

Welp, done with you here. However before I go I will explain sole care to you.

Sole care:

Living in the attached apartment, moms old digs.

24/fugging 7 on call. Sister and I split day and night duties. Nights? You sleep with a baby monitor in your bed and your cell in your hand. You never really sleep well. I am terrified she will die on my watch because I was asleep. We have had power outages and the oxygen is off. I can't hear that through the monitor.

Breakfast. Lunch. Dinner. Bathroom. Bathroom. Bathroom. Naps. Showers.

Please just leave me alone. I truly do not need your responses. They are hurtful in these times.

[mcar]

35. How could she be the sole caregiver for her mother

and live in another state?

[sheshe2]

38. Thank you.

That really hurt me, mcar. It hurt a lot.

[Ms. Toad]

41. Well -

Being sole caregiver doesn't inherently mean living in the same house. Living close to the border between two states, with mother across the state line, in a state with different rules, is one possibility.

[sheshe2]

48. WHEN YOU ARE A SOLE CAREGIVER

Caregiving for a loved one over a long period of time can be challenging. It is even more so when you are on your own. This month, Elder Voice focuses on issues around being a sole caregiver.

Sole caregivers often tell us that they have a feeling of aloneness. Even when they have a good support system–a counsellor, an actual support group, or friends who have been through the same thing–talking with someone who is not involved is not the same because it is not their husband, wife, or parent.

snip


After the relationship and the responsibility for decisions, there is a third aspect of sole caregiving that is unique– having responsibility for all of the tasks.Even if the caregiver does not actually do everything, they are the ones who are managing the care system. They often do not see themselves as having the option of taking a break. When an issue arises in their own life, such as with their health, with their children or spouse or if they simply feel exhausted or overwhelmed, they have to make a choice. They think they are being selfish when they choose to meet their needs or those of their family before the needs of the person they are caring for.They have a sense of not being able to win.

snip

Rational approaches will always entail doing some emotional work at the same time. They require you to be able to be good to yourself and value yourself, set limits for yourself, and be compassionately assertive. Understand that the decision making involved in being a caregiver, and caregiving itself, is a process that brings up strong emotions, not just guilt but also grief. These can cause all sorts of negative voices in your head that can erode your confidence making decision making and care more difficult. We urge you to avail yourself of the help that is available such as from a support group, from online forums, or a Diamond Geriatrics Counsellor/Case Manager. It may not be the same as having someone share the responsibility, but it can help. Just because you are a sole caregiver, you do not need to be alone in the storm.

https://www.diamondgeriatrics.com/newsletters/2014-newsletters/when-you-are-a-sole-caregiver/

When you have done this, get back to me.

[Ms. Toad]

50. I said absolutely nothing to minimize the challenges of being a sole caregiver

Or even one of two sole caregivers, which is how you phrased it.

One way of self-care, when there is more than one person involved in providing care, is to maintain a separate residence and to take turns providing care so that when you are not actively providing care you can truly take a break.

The question I asked was a question. Not an accusation. Not a judgment.

[George II]

37. Unbelievable.

[Ms. Toad]

42. The responses are more unbelievable.

I asked a straightforward question in response to a situation that was not explained by the poster to whom I responded.

The poster got an appointment and made a point of saying her mom was on a waiting list for a vaccination. She didn't specify that her mom was on the waiting list for a different kind of appointment that she got.

My brother-in-law was offered an appointment the same time as my spouse was offered one. He declined because he thought he could just walk into his doctor's office and get an appointment. Different states have different rules. Being the sole caregiver for someone doesn't inherently mean living together. Her mom may have lived in a different state than the person I responded to. I have no idea what other circumstances might lead to getting an appointment but being unable to get mom off the waiting list. So I asked.

[sheshe2]

44. Thanks, George.

[avebury]

22. If you have a Sam's Club membership

you might be able to get your mom a vaccine there. The Sam's near where I live keeps a wait list and I actually got my shot Friday after being put on the list Tuesday. It may make a difference where you live as some areas have higher density populations which has to make it even worse trying to schedule a shot.

[sheshe2]

25. Thanks, avebury.

However my mother is housebound. The only way she leaves the house is when she dies and not before.

[orleans]

27. i hope someone is able to come and vaccinate your mom soon.

(my understanding is that just because someone has gotten the vax doesn't mean they still can't spread covid.)

does the county have nurses that are going into homes for people who can't get out? who is going into homes to give the vaccine? (just wondering)

i'm so glad you were able to get yours.

illinois began an expansion of phase 1B on feb. 25 but my county says NO expansion b/c they are so low on the vaccines to begin with. so that leaves me hanging out there in the wind (or whatever that phrase is)

[sheshe2]

29. Back in March we stopped all hospice in home help.

July we started it up with minimal help. One nurse per week and one that evaluates mom once a month to see if she still qualifies for hospice. One woman twice a week for showers.

Yes the nurse will provide the shot.

Thanks and I hope you get yours soon. Biden is ramping up production and distribution. You will get yours soon, orleans.

[catrose]

30. After trying for more than a month, my whole family was vaccinated this week.

Age and underlying conditions put us all in 1B. And all of a sudden, friends all over the country are being vaccinated too. The Biden supply is rolling in.

One of the places where I signed up all those weeks ago sent me an email saying that they were receiving 2000 doses each week and they had 100,000 people signed up. They also contacted me this week, after I was already vaccinated at the city facility. So it’s going much faster now.

I know your family will be in the vaxxed group soon. It is a torturous process though. I signed up with at least four places and checked in multiple times each day, for those places where it was possible.

[MLAA]

33. So good you got yours today! Congrats.

I got husband one of the first appointments for 75 and over. This Monday will be two weeks from his second dose. I am so, so relieved. He is 85 and I’ve been so worried for him. A couple days ago I spent 4 days checking Walgreens, CVS, local Pima County sites, Hospital et al for my sister right after they opened up to 65 and older. Finally Thursday night I found a spot for the first dose at Safeway Pharmacy. Their application wouldn’t let me make an appointment for the second until after she actually gets her first dose. That process makes me a little uneasy. I’m 60 so I’m hoping to get mine by May. But it is such a relief to get husband and sister’s done.

So my advice if you are in an area like mine that doesn’t take waiting lists, just keep checking for openings all throughout the day as there is no discernible pattern of when each outlet opens up more appointments 🙂💕

[sheshe2]

34. I am glad your husband and sister got their shot and appointment.

It is such a relief. We all still need to be cautious. This isn't over with the shots.

So my advice if you are in an area like mine that doesn’t take waiting lists, just keep checking for openings all throughout the day as there is no discernible pattern of when each outlet opens up more appointments

Just keep trying over and over again. I had two others looking for me, fact is my sister found the appointment for me. As for waiting lists, I strongly suggest no one relies on them. I found that out when CVS put me on one for the shingles shot. I asked and asked and they said due to COVID, nada. Then when I made the appointment for my flu shot in October I asked again...they said yes it was available. I said then why was I not informed. Answer: we were to overwhelmed. I waited for more than a year and finally got one no thanks to them.

[mcar]

36. You know, she,

with all the talk about vaccines in nursing homes, I never heard a thing about plans for the homebound - until your OP.

I hope they can work it out for your mom very soon.

[sheshe2]

47. They are relatively safe.

Sort of.

Homebound have to wait in line.

[Hermit-The-Prog]

52. Wish you could have it as easy as I have ...

All I've had to do is stay home, which is no hardship for a 'hermit'.

My only worries have been for my son, daughter-in-law, and grandchildren. They're out in the wilderness just like me, but have to go out because our MAGAt-infested school system keeps ignoring the threat. (Son and DIL are both vaccinated, but now burning sick days because, of course, the children have not been vaccinated). To illustrate the stupidity, the school split classes but mandated masks must be worn on the bus or outside but can be taken off once inside. Now they're going to go full classes, full schedule, with no mention of masks at all. I guess they're disappointed in the drop in infection and death.

[sheshe2]

55. Sorry your family has to deal with that.

Full time with no mask mandate. That is just plain crazy.

Hope they all stay safe, Hermit.