Trigger warning. Mention of suicide. Ramblings on why things are the way they are.

[LuckyCharms]

Fame, wealth, incredible good looks, elite social circles, and appearing to have life by the balls...all of these things...are nothing more than briefly passing man-made constructs. Everything we have in this life is relative to something else.

I just read here in DU about the suicide of Cheslie Kryst, a 30 year old former Miss USA. The thought of this make me sad for her, and her suicide causes me to reflect.

I believe that in most cases, suicide is simply an attempt to escape mental or physical pain. It is not a selfish act. It usually happens when the pain being experienced by a suicidal person makes suicide look like a better option. Pain that pushes someone to suicide may be caused by trauma, mental illness, a brain injury or a chronic physical disease. Or maybe, something has happened in that person's life that caused them pain that cannot be understood or labeled by anyone else. Or just maybe, suicide is merely answering the call of the void.

Some people are considered to be exceptionally attractive, exceptionally well-spoken, and may have labels assigned to them, indicating that they are the "best". Perhaps they have been groomed to be "the best". Maybe people in these situations, deep down, don't want to be "the best". Maybe they just want to be good, normal people who make the world a better place. People who are labeled "the best" and who are consistently showered with love and adoration for being "the best", may feel like they are impostors. Maybe they feel guilt for heading down a road that would eventually lead to people awarding them for being "the best". Maybe at some point they realized "Hey, I don't want to be the best, I just want to be me", but they were too far down the road to turn back. And now, much is expected of them. They are forced to live up to the standard's of others, when they just want to be themselves.

On a far different point on this spectrum, people who truly feel they are better than others and deserve more than others can likely be a true danger to people they interact with. I'm referring to damaged people with personality disorders here. If they can't be helped, if they can't be treated, the actual and potential damage they will or might cause needs to be recognized and mitigated.

And then, we have just regular people. Some rich, some poor, some traditionally attractive, some not traditionally attractive, some fat, some thin, some with a perfect BMI, some intelligent, some not so intelligent.

I kind of took the long way around to say this: Beauty pageants, political theater, idol worship, hurting others for the hell of it, being a prick to people just because you can...these are all man made constructs that don't need to exist, because in the end, no matter what we look like, no matter how rich or poor we are, WE ARE ALL THE SAME because when the game is over, we're either going to be in a casket or an urn. Each and every one of us.

Fuck people over as hard as you can because you have money and power? Why?

Place unrealistic expectations on a pretty woman who won a contest that perhaps, she was groomed to win her entire life by others, when perhaps, just perhaps that's not really what she wanted to do? Why?

Fat shame? Why?

Racism? Why?

Classify people by their physical or mental attributes which they may have have no control over? Why?

Why not just *BE*, and be the best you can without putting yourself or others into man-made categories?

Why be *bad* when you can be *good*?

Because for generation upon generation upon generation, people did not grok that we are the same. Different talents, different languages, different cultures, but essentially, the same people who would ALL be *good* people had their own personal history not been fucked up by people in their past or circumstances in their past. None of which would have occurred if it were human nature for people throughout history to just *BE* and to support *ALL* who for one reason or another, were having difficulty just *BEING*. But I guess human nature doesn't work quite like that.

We all get sick. We all die. Rich or poor, it happens to all of us. And in the meantime, some people try to ruin others for their own benefit. That's human nature, and I guess it always will be.

[secondwind]

1. I just cannot fathom jumping from an open window.

I agree with your assessment, but …

What if there is a change of heart? 😩

[LuckyCharms]

2. People who have survived jumping off the Golden Gate bridge...

have stated that they knew they made a mistake as soon as their hands left the railing.

But again...the issue, I truly believe, is about escaping pain, and usually it is not anymore complicated than that. It may not be a good choice in reality, but it *appears* to be a good choice based upon the amount of pain a person is in. Not being that person, we cannot judge their pain.

It is the same reason that people jumped from the towers during 911. Their minds told them (and it was probably a fact) that jumping was the better option.

[babylonsister]

3. People jumping

from the towers had two choices, jump or burn to death, so that's not quite the same. There was no good choice.

[LuckyCharms]

4. For many people who suicide, it's the same thing...

Their pain is perceived to be so bad that suicide seems the better choice.

We may not perceive their pain like that, but they do.

Granted, a suicidal mind is usually not rational, but many view it as an either/or decision.

[ZZenith]

8. Yes, one of the few people to survive it is quoted as saying,

“I instantly realized that everything in my life that I’d thought was unfixable was totally fixable—except for having just jumped.”

That quote has saved my bacon more times than I care to admit.

[SheltieLover]

5. K&R!

Insightful!

[mahatmakanejeeves]

6. A rare serious post from LuckyCharms. Thanks. NT

[3Hotdogs]

7. My friend killed himself, maybe about 20 years ago. He was diagnosed, manic-depressive.

When Reagan won the election, he did't leave his bedroom for over two weeks, except food and toilet. Other times, his world was on fire.

Then one day, he got a haircut, put on a good suit and tie and dress shoes and shot himself in the bath tub. His letter said he chose the bathtub so's there would be less mess to clean.

I don't believe it is always a function of rational/irrational. sometimes it is a bad chemical imbalance.

Then there is the video of the guy in a courtroom who was convicted of whatever he was convicted of. Video shows him putting his hand to his mouth and collapsing, seconds later About one minute later, he was dead.

[LuckyCharms]

9. I'm so sorry about your friend.

I can imagine how you and others close to him feel about his death.

I've had a few people close to me commit suicide. it's almost impossible to wrap your head around unless you have experienced what clinical depression does to you.

It causes physic and physical pain. Actual pain that is felt like any other pain. And a person who is severely depressed can experience pain that is worse than breaking every bone in your body. Couple that with the fact that your mind is so scrambled up that the only thing you can focus on is what your mind is telling you, and what your mind is telling you is not even close to reality. For example, your mind may tell you that you have never been useful, and people you love would be better off with you gone.

Throw all of this bad stuff together into a toxic mental soup, and suicide seems like a reasonable way to make all of it stop.

I am also aware of suicides that are caused by factors that are different than what I just described. These are sudden suicides where it seems that people just casually say "fuck it" and kill themselves for no reason that can be analyzed.