G.O.P. Unveils Immigration Plan: “We Must Make America Somewhere No One Wants to Live”
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell unveiled his partys long-awaited plan on immigration on Wednesday, telling reporters, We must make America somewhere no one wants to live.
Appearing with House Speaker John Boehner, McConnell said that, in contrast to President Obamas Band-Aid fixes, the Republican plan would address the root cause of immigration, which is that the United States is, for the most part, habitable.
For years, immigrants have looked to America as a place where their standard of living was bound to improve, McConnell said. Were going to change that.
Boehner said that the Republicans plan would reduce or eliminate immigration magnets, such as the social safety net, public education, clean air, and drinkable water.
MORE SATIRE HERE: http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/republicans-unveil-immigration-plan
ruffburr
(1,190 posts)I thought it was their platform.
virtualobserver
(8,760 posts)but you are right, it is their actual platform.