6 Things I learned in a Tennessee Courtroom Yesterday Update: forgot to say: crosspost from GD
Last edited Tue Aug 25, 2015, 10:54 PM - Edit history (1)
The South is “god's country,” so they say, but spend any time in the South at all, and you realize their god is a vindictive asshole. Personally, I don't believe in any god, mainly because, unlike the several alleged “real” gods out there, I fed all of my kids every day, something no Sky Daddy seems capable of doing. I didn't let the stronger kids exploit or abuse the weaker ones. I didn't leave half of them to starve, hoping some other person would take up my slack. If I, a mere mortal, can do as much, why can't the omnipotent, all-powerful alleged gods step up to the plate and manage the same?
However, I also believe that it is our duty to help the less fortunate, the sick, the vulnerable. One of my friends is on disability for epilepsy. I mow his lawn once a week just because I can, and because it helps him feel better. When my disabled friend asked me for a ride to a local courthouse for a scheduled hearing on his case, I said yes. He'd had a seizure last time he was in court, so his doctor prescribed him Valium to keep him calm this time around, meaning he couldn't drive himself.
He knows I have PTSD, and I warned him that he probably didn't want me going into the actual courtroom with him. When I see blatant stupidity or injustice, I can't keep my mouth shut. I know this about myself. It is my main weakness or my main strength, depending on whom you ask. But my friend just laughed. He wasn't born in the South, either, so he wasn't raised with the idea that women should be submissive and sweet.
Now, I have seen some real tragedies take place in Tennessee courtrooms. This remains what I call a “Plantation State.” You've got a ton of older Caucasian males here who all want to be “the Master,” and who believe that poor people and people of color are their playthings. Their god wants them to be happy and on top, so they quote “bobble verses” to prove that old, fat, pasty men are to be the rulers of all. Some of the women in Tennessee are no better. They would still wear hoop skirts and order slaves around if they could get away with it. When these women are not pining for their fluffy antebellum wonderland, they're gossiping about one another. These women become district attorneys and court clerks and probation officers and treat their “inferior” human neighbors with every bit of disdain and vindictiveness as their male masters. To say the culture here--in and out of court--is painful and terrifying for anyone with a conscience or a soul would be a severe understatement. “If you don't like it, leave!” is their only response.
I definitely did not want to be in the courtroom itself yesterday. I wanted to sit outside and smoke cigarettes and work on my desperate, ongoing project I've named Escape from Bubbaland. Yes, I am doing as so many Southerners have suggested – I am getting the hell out. And there's no sorrow in that. Think about this: Suppose you went to someone's home and their toilet was overflowing. Raw sewage is flooding the floors. Imagine you run out and inform the couple who own the home about the problem, and instead of trying to fix the toilet, they tell you to get the hell out of their home and use your own toilet if theirs isn't good enough. “If you don't like it here, leave!” they scream at you, waving their Confederate flags over their new sea of poo. Would you fight to stay in a home that's a shit show? Nope. They want to wallow in it, that's their business, but smart people will run from that couple's putrid neighborhood as fast as their legs will carry them.
But I wanted to be in the courtroom for my friend in case he fell out again, and to see what they would say about his case. Despite the Valium, he was shaking and twitching and afraid, meaning he really needed the moral support. So I entered the courtroom and sat down with him to watch yet another Southern Shit Show.
Most everyone in the local area knows why my friend was initially arrested several years ago. He had let some people move in, and these goons had exploited him for years. He finally had enough and lost it when the roommates threatened him with bodily harm. What are the goons who threatened him and brought charges against him doing today? The female is in jail, we believe for cooking meth, and the male was just fired from his new job at McDonald's. Why? Because my friend walked in, not knowing the male ex-roommate had recently started working there, and the same idiot threatened to spit in my friend's food right in front of the restaurant manager. Not the brightest or the most stable tool in the shed, to say the least. I should add that the local police chief was not on duty when my friend was arrested years ago because of these fools, but he told my friend that if he, the chief, had been involved, the exploiters would have been the ones going to jail. Instead, my friend was convicted of assault and lost his apartment because of it. However, he did his time and is on probation.
At some point early in his probation period, he tested positive for cannabis. Now remember: this is the South, where, despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary, evolution is a lie and cannabis is the Debbil's Weed. Even though scientists have proven conclusively that cannabis helps epilepsy, his probation was violated and he spent more time locked up. When he got out, he sought a way to get the medicine he needed (yes, Southern dumbasses, cannabis has been used as medicine for thousands of years, even though you don't want to admit it.) He discovered CBD oil.
The reader not from this cesspool of humanity called Dixie should understand that recently, a bunch of Southern states played a wicked game on their constituents. They wanted to shut up the parents of kids who were having hundreds of seizures a day, so they made CBD oil--medicine made from cannabis-- legal, but only for epilepsy. The asshole legislators in Southern states are playing a hideous game, though, because they provide no provisions for people to actually obtain the CBD oil legally.
Can you imagine the ugliness of the white males who make it impossible for people to obtain medicine that helps keep their seizures under control? It's the Southern legislators' idea of a cruel joke that they can get away with, while pretending to actually have compassion for sick people. Remember, this is the South, where the sick, the weak, the vulnerable and the poor are simply the playthings of white Southern males. Those state governors, senators, and representatives in states including Georgia, Tennessee, and Kentucky must have laughed their asses off.
“Ha ha! We're gonna act like we care, but we really don't! Joke's on you sick people, you SUCKERS!” This is the South in a nutshell. I've been to LA and NYC, and never have I seen the sick, perverse smirks on the faces of “officials” that I've seen here in Tennessee. Nowhere on earth are publicly-paid employees as arrogant, self-serving, and smug as they are in Tennessee. There is a reason Tennessee ranks as the third most corrupt state in the US, and their smirks prove that they are proud of this fact.
My friend started using the CBD oil before it was actually legal, because he was able to buy it online. He is a confirmed sick person, I should note. He fell off a roof many years ago resulting in a severe head injury. The Social Security administration does not hand out disability designations based on hearsay or whining. Anyone on disability knows the hoops you must jump through to be declared disabled, which include reams of documentation and many physical examinations and tests. So he isn't “faking” his condition and he isn't faking the fact that cannabis helps him with muscle stiffness and stress-related seizure threats. Despite the fact that the DA and his probation officer tried to violate his probation, and successfully did so several times, he continues taking the cannabis oil because it helps him so much.
Once CBD oil became legal, it still did not matter to the podunk county DA or the probation officers assigned to my friend's case. The oil may be legal in Tennessee, but in their little rinky dink, petty courtrooms, cannabis is still as bad as heroin. Now, I should add that the prosecutors and judges and probation officers must know in their heart of hearts that cannabis is a benign plant that really should be legal, but they make such bank off of cruelly prosecuting anyone who uses even the smallest amount, they are not going to give up that gravy train. EVER. Cannabis will never, ever be legal in the South because it helps the Plantation Owners stay on top. It's very lucrative for underfunded county justice systems and attorneys, even if the war on a plant is bankrupting the rest of us. They don't care. It's all about the money for them, Baby.
They surely must notice that states where medical cannabis is legal have seen a 25% reduction in prescription painkiller deaths. But why save people from dying from overdoses of truly dangerous drugs when you can extort money from people who use a safe herb? Money is GAWD AMIGHTY in the South, despite how often they say, “Jesus,” and everyone who has ever been involved in their joke of a legal system knows it.
So, because traces of THC showed up on a few drug screens (which is possible with some CBD oils) they want to put an epileptic guy back in jail. Tennessee apparently has a lot of money to spend trying to put sick people in jail. Must be nice to have money to burn on such cruel pursuits; they certainly don't waste any public funds helping sick people here. For example, my cousin has a similar epileptic condition as my friend, due to a severe sports-related head injury. But he lives in New York. New York State understands that Social Security disability payments are not really enough to live on, so the state augments the payments and offers my cousin additional assistance with his expenses. The “Bobble Belt” does the exact opposite. I cannot tell you how many times in courtrooms in Tennessee that I have seen people on disability be nickeled and dimed into abject poverty by money-hungry DAs who see someone with even the most paltry income as someone to extort for the most petty of offenses.
“Does the federal gubbmint send you a check ever month?” they ask in their sick drawls? “Well, by gawd, we want summa dat money, Honey, so hand it over NOW or we'll put you in jail!” Other friends and family members have reported the same phenomenon in courtrooms all over the South. One of my kids works as as an indigent defense attorney, and the stories he could tell you from Georgia, Alabama, and Florida would horrify anyone with a soul. So, no, the South doesn't see any value in helping sick people have a better standard of living. These cruel Tennessee fucks--Democrats and Republicans-- want to get their hands on that disability money, and they don't care what evil they must do or suffering they must cause to get it.
We sat in the courtroom all day yesterday, despite the fact that the judge promised to get to my friend's case as soon as he could. I must note that I have seen this judge in action on many occasions. I will say that he does treat every individual with respect, regardless of their crimes, race, or gender. I admire that. I will admit as well that he describes, in simple layman's terms, the legal ramifications of plea-bargaining to anyone who pleads out, to ensure they understand their rights. He seems like a fair and kind judge, in the same way Bill Cosby probably sounded nice to the women he was about to rape.
I had some hope for my friend, because, even though this judge hasn't seen a harsh DA punishment he didn't automatically approve, he did tell my friend's probation officer several months back not to violate him for positive drug tests until the court could sort out the legality of the CBD oil use. That's what yesterday was about.
So what did I learn in a Tennessee courtroom yesterday?
Thing 1: Murder and drug use are the 2 worst crimes ever in the history of the world.
The first thing I learned was that having a drug addiction is the second worse thing to murdering another human. These words flew out of the judge's mouth during one of the first cases. A guy had failed to appear for his probation meetings for a year, and when he finally showed up, he tested positive for some drug or another. (They never stated what the drug was.) I am paraphrasing the judge here, but his statement was essentially, “So you've been convicted of a drug offense, you disappear for a year and then you still are using? The only thing worse than that is murder!”
Are you fucking kidding me? Someone with a health issue – which is what addiction really is – is akin to a murderer? Goddamn, judge. This explains why, all over the South, there are thousands of rape kits going back years and years that are never analyzed or processed. A rapist is more protected than a drug user in the South. So are child molesters, people who rob old folks, and government officials who rob the public. Being addicted to drugs is worse than torturing your spouse, torturing animals, or arson. Having an addiction is worse than embezzling money from your company, stealing from your hard-working neighbor, or cheating on your taxes. Amazing. I did not know this.
Thing 2: If you can chew gum and mock people relentlessly, you, too, can become a Tennessee probation officer.
The second thing I learned is that they don't pay probation officers in Tennessee enough, because the profession appears to attract the most immature, irreverent creeps in the state. They sit in the courtroom in a knot off to the side, sort of like the chorus in a Greek tragedy. Only they're over there laughing at the defendants, chonking loudly on their special probation officer-issued blue gum, and blowing huge blue bubbles. They repeatedly and anxiously get up and down from their seats like confirmed meth addicts. The courtroom is a joke to them, a Southern Shit Show that amuses them to no end. The fact that people's lives are being destroyed for next to nothing is even more fodder for their entertainment. Every courtroom I've had the misfortune to visit in Tennessee is just like this, with probation officers showing just how cruel, sophomoric, and unprofessional they can be, and fuck you if you don't like it. Amazing. I thought this was an anomaly in a few courtrooms, but now I realize that they only hire immature, mean-spirited idiots to be probation officers in Tennessee, and then they pay these morons to sit in a courtroom, blow bubbles and distract the assembled citizens. Must be nice. But maybe if they paid a bit more money, they could find some mature, professional adults to become probation officers? It's just a thought.
Thing 3: Some addictions are fed and encouraged by the courts, while a few are demonized and punished severely.
The third thing I learned is that attorneys are getting very, very fat, and no one calls them on their addiction to food. In that courtroom yesterday, I saw some of the hugest guts on human beings that I have ever seen in my life. From the DA to the lame, cowardly public defender, the bellies were epic, popping buttons and holding court all on their own. Cannabis won't lead anyone to die, but the heart disease these gluttons are courting by gorging themselves with all of their ill-gotten gains will kill them. But you keep stuffing your pie holes, lawyers in Tennessee! Keep gorging on unhealthy food, raising everyone's insurance rates, and being a danger on the road. I mean, come on! Some of these guys look like they're 3 seconds away from a heart attack or a stroke, and I have to drive on the same roads as these people? Great! Funny thing is, the only non-county-employed female attorney present was thin as a rail, and none of the regular public in attendance was severely overweight. Clearly, an addiction to food is an acceptable addiction, no matter how harmful it is to society, and clearly, the legal war that rages against the poor and working class people in this state is extremely lucrative. You go, Tennessee attorneys! Vilify the addictions you don't have, but you're still goddamned addicts with less self-control than the people whose lives you destroy for their addictions.
Thing 4: Kids who steal can be forgiven; kids who use drugs are felons forever.
The fourth thing I learned is that you can be a kid and steal a $500 TV from Walmart, but the judge still cares about your future, unlike any kid caught with pot or pills. Yesterday, an admitted young thief was told by the judge that his life didn't have to be ruined over this, since he could have his record expunged if he stuck with his probation agreement. But I've seen this same judge convict mere babies of drug-related felonies, where these kids lose every right they have before they even have a shot at life: no voting, no student loans, can't join the army except as a grunt, can't even leave their little podunk counties without permission, even if there are no jobs where they live. I haven't seen this judge make any mention to these kids about their lives having value. A drug offense, even for an 18-year-old in Tennessee, turns a mere child into a felon, destroying his life forever because he harmed himself. But, if you steal from others, and do harm to other people, you get another chance. The war on drugs has created a moral code that creates an underclass of depressed, oppressed kids who never get an opportunity to rise out of poverty or away from their criminal records, while the DA's and lawyers keep packing on the pounds with all of the fees and court costs they throw on these kids' backs. If only these kids had been thieves, stealing from hard-working people! Then, they might be given a second chance. But then I must remember that drug use is akin to murder, while stealing from other people is fine. The courts do it every fucking day, so of course they think it's a forgivable offense!
Thing 5: District attorneys lurve them some cruel punishments, but DA's are special snowflakes who should never be judged themselves.
The fifth thing I learned is that DA's in Tennessee adore draconian punishments for others, but if you think the DA deserves a harsh punishment, he or she will recoil in horror. How dare you! The DA tried to make a bargain with my friend: no jail time if you agree to never use CBD oil again. Read that again. The DA's deal was: I won't throw you in jail if you agree not to use a legal substance that helps you. Unfucking believable. Here I am wondering how the DA is able to get so obese while spending so many hours in court. I'm looking for his stash of Twinkies under the prosecutor's table, curious about his eating habits when I should have been more concerned about the guys' mental acuity. How dumb and cruel do you have to be to be this guy? Addicted like a motherfucker to legal groceries that are making him sick, while trying to demand that another human being not use a legal herbal supplement that makes him feel better? You've got to be a real monster to be that callous and cold. You've got to have zero self-awareness to not realize you have a weight problem, yet you feel free to advise others about their health issues. The DA did not rest easy with a sheet from the CBD oil manufacturer stating that, yes, sometimes a small bit of THC will show up on a drug screen. He is now going to force the county to pay for a CBD expert to come to court to prove that my friend is actually smoking the demon weed.
Tennessee has a lot of money for this petty shit, apparently, because the DA is intensely and obsessively committed to putting an epileptic in jail. I hissed under my breath--so I thought--that I hoped the DA gets cancer. Maybe others think that's cruel. But if a DA wants to be draconian over cannabis, he deserves draconian punishments of his own. Whenever I hear of an official trying to ruin sick people's lives over cannabis, I always wish a debilitating, painful disease on them. A disease that is only truly relieved with cannabis. So, yeah, I would rather the DA acquire the other C-word: compassion. But the likelihood of that ever happening is right down there with the likelihood of the DA ever going on a diet, so I wish on him the other C-word, so he can truly be enlightened and understand the suffering he creates with his petty little obsession over putting sick people in jail. One of the most arrogant members of the court staff, whose job I never ascertained, must have heard me utter the C-word. As we walked out of the courtroom, he must have told the DA what I said, because the DA exclaimed, “What did I do to deserve that?!?” I turned and he and the Arrogant One were staring straight at me.
What did you do, you overweight, gluttonous food addict? Well, for starters, you are so twisted and lacking in compassion, you actually get a hard-on at the thought of putting a sick person in jail. You are practically orgasming all over the courtroom at the thought of catching someone using a plant in the privacy of their own home. You want to send a sick person to jail for nothing, just because you can. But you, inside your mean, cruel, ugly self, don't want to face the punishment YOU deserve for being such an evil person? Sorry, Dude. You deserve a thousand times the punishments you mete out on others. You were able to get an education, get a decent job, and you eat very, very, very well --obviously. Yet the best thing you could find to do with your life is exploit and oppress poor and sick people? For profit and to add to your expansive girth? Yeah, I can't think of anyone who deserves punishment worse than a human being with all of the advantages of life who uses their position to make people miserable. What did you do? You know what the fuck you do every day, asshole, to bring that money in for your county. You're nothing more than a legal, glorified thug. I hope you suffer a thousand times worse than the people you've exploited and extorted over the years. And you know I'm telling the truth about you, so don't act shocked that I'm not the first person to wish on you what you've doled out to others. You like draconian punishment, remember? I will hope every day that you receive it in kind, Big Boy.
Thing 6: It's hard to train a woman.
The sixth thing I learned is that woman are hard to train. The Arrogant One I mentioned above made that statement to my friend as he exited the defense table. As is usual for me, I'd made more than a few comments about how fucked up the legal system in the South is, and I offended the poor one with testicles. I guess I was supposed to be equally offended by his ignorant statement, but I just looked at the guy like he was the moron he truly is. But I do have so many tasty, satisfying comebacks in my playbook, I was tempted to reply to the scumbag.
“The Taliban called, and they want their misogyny back.”
“Oh, you haven't heard? I understand, you poor dumb dear. This is the South after all. But women are people, too, not dogs. Shocking, isn't it?”
“Yeah, just got a message from ISIS. They have to train all of the girls and women they've abducted and raped and they desperately need your help!”
But why waste any insult on this piece of Tennessee trash? I laughed for an hour over the “training women” comment last night. It thrilled me no end that I had really pissed this guy off, and me a lowly woman and all! I kept picturing the Pretty Boy getting the vapors and clutching the pearls hidden under the folds of his tie, his Southern sensibilities just torn ragged by an uppity wymmins! The poor thing couldn't think of anything more clever to say than a comment that could have been uttered by a caveman.
But then I thought, this guy probably treats women like shit inside and outside of the courtroom, and he gets paid to do so. And then I thought, if we could untrain some of the women in Tennessee, maybe they would stand up to assholes like this guy, and force their government to stop making their kids felons over petty drug charges, and start making people's lives better in their state. How sad that they “train” their women down here to be doormats to cruel, self-serving, women-hating men. If only the women here would stand up and tell these goons to cut the crap and start acting right. But they won't. And that makes me sad.
So, my friend will have to return to court, and spend the next month before the court date freaking out about being sent to jail again just because he wants to feel physically better and he has found an herbal substance that helps him do just that.
I hope he finds another ride next time. I've learned too many things in Southern courtrooms about evil people, things that I never wanted to know, and things that hurt my heart to no end because of the people who are suffering. I don't need to see any more of the Southern Shit Show, and only want out of the South. It's a cesspool of cruelty, misogyny, and ignorance that will never rise above the Plantation State status.
TL;DR: Sick, poor, and vulnerable people in the South are at the mercy of greedy, cruel thugs, addicts, and idiots. Praise Jesus.
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--imm
