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Perhaps the most onerous part of this despicable Bankruptcy Bill that is about to become law was Senator Bill Frist on TV the other day lecturing Americans about "personal responsibility", and financial responsibility. How Mr. Frist can have the nerve to lecture Americans about financial responsibility is beyond me. That's like having a drug addicted, thrice married, anal cyst chicken-hawk hate radio host lecturing Americans about morality, virtue, values and sacrifice.
If I had the personal wealth, or political connections to win a seat in the House or Senate, the first bill I would introduce would be a bill to apply the new Bankruptcy rules to the United States Government. And I wouldn't be too keen about exemptions either.
Don't ask me for a military exemption. Just as the government denied protection to our men and women in uniform who may face financial ruin because of extended deployments in Iraq, the government would not be able to come crying to the American people because they overextended themselves. If they are so financially irresponsible to abuse the full faith and credit of the United States government, then they should have to pay. Can't meet your obligations, government? Well, you should have planned better. If you want to send the military to prance all over the world spreading your unique brand of freedom, then you have to pay when the bill is due. No more deficit spending, no more reckless abuse of credit, no more debt. I just can't support someone who so recklessly abuses credit. Under my plan, you would have to cut back the number of troops, reduce their pay, eliminate costly weapons and training programs, tighten your belt, or raise more money. I'm sure if it is worth the lives of our children, it should at least be worth an extra $300 a year from Ken Lay and others.
Don't ask me for a catastrophic care exemption either. Just like that American family that works all their lives, and then through a terrible tragedy like cancer, or an automobile wreck, faces financial ruin in the form of millions of dollars in medical expenses, don't come crying to Americans or the Bankruptcy Courts for protection. If through your incompetence, we are brutally attacked again, well...you should have planned better. I have no sympathy for a government that runs up astronomical debt, abuses the full faith and credit of the United States, and then comes crying because of a natural or man-made disaster. Want financial protection? I'll tell you what you have told that American family. "You shouldn't have gotten sick, so suck it up, you have a financial responsibility to pay the bill even if it takes all your life". So government, you fail to plan, then you have to pay. We'll work something out.
I don't want to encourage gay marriage or anything like that by giving you an exemption in the case of divorce either. If you are so divorced from reality that you give away huge tax cuts to the wealthiest Americans during a time of war and debt, then that's your own irresponsibility and you need to pay. I have no problem with you cutting taxes. But if those tax cuts blow a hole in the budget, you have to make it up somewhere. I have a few proposals.
1. Every member of the Legislative and Executive branches of government would be required to take a second job. It's the American way. I will not continue to support bankruptcy abuse by people that are perfectly capable of working. Each of you would be required to take an additional job. The salary from that job would go to the government coffers. It's only fair. You made this mess, and I will not subsidize your abuse of credit any longer. You want truck drivers to work 16-hour days. You want to change the 40-hour workweek to 50 or more? Fine! Then there should be nothing wrong with you having the personal responsibility to get your financial house in order. If that means taking a second job, so be it.
2. You all have these campaign accounts with millions and millions of dollars just sitting there. We don't need to see any more advertisements telling us how fantastic you are. This money would go into the government account. If there are a few pennies left after you pay your bill, you can use it to ride the bus around your districts getting to know the people whose money you've been spending. Tar and Feathers would be tax-deductible.
3. I see no reason why someone who serves in the congress for a couple of years earns a lifetime pension. My bill would require that the money from your pension fund be used to pay your bills. My motto is; "If It's Good Enough for Enron, It's Good Enough for the USA".
4. Why are we spending all of this money on lifetime Secret Service Protection? You serve maybe 4 years as president. For that you get lifetime Secret Service protection for you and your family? Believe me that's not cheap. I wish we had the money to pay for it, but you've abused your credit. This is something that you should plan for. If you run for president, you have to know that you're only going to serve 4 or 8 years. You should have planned better for your retirement. You raise 100's of millions of dollars for your campaign; surely you could afford your own private security detail. Besides, Privatization is Good!!!
5. There seems to be a great deal of artifacts and valuable items lying around the house as well. Under my plan you would be required to hold a "sheriffs sale" for all of that stuff. Just think how much someone may pay for the Lincoln Memorial. Just like that small business owner that must liquidate all their fixtures and equipment, the same should apply to the United States Government. Every seat and desk and lamp in the Senate could be sold to the highest bidder. Unlike the votes you sell, this money would go into the treasury. I'm not quite sure what we could get for the Constitution though; you've devalued it so much over the years.
Look government. You need to pull yourself up by the "bootstraps". These poor credit card companies are entitled to having millions of Americans serving them as indentured servants. I simply propose that you apply the laws you pass to yourselves. I don't think you will support my plan though. In my plan it is the American People who are playing the role of the credit card companies, and WE WANT OUR MONEY BACK!! That would mean that you would become our indentured servants. You would serve us, and ensure our money is spent responsibly. That is what the creators of this country intended. Isn't it?
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