Reply #13: OK, I looked up the original and decided to try the whole thing... [View All]

[FormerRepublican]

Twas the night before Fitzmas, when all through the White House
The cockroaches were stirring and so was the Souse.
The indictments were hung on the courthouse with care,
In hopes that Fitzgerald soon would be there.

The richest were snuggled all warm in their beds,
While visions of jail time danced in our heads.
The TV was blaring, my PC in my lap
We had just settled down after yet more Bush crap.

When in front of the White House there arose such a clatter
As dozens of law men were starting to gather.
Away from the White House, the cockroaches did run
With not one of them left free when Fitzgerald was done.

The glow of the law on the criminal rable
Gave a luster of justice to even that cabal.
When what to our longing eyes did appear,
but a government car with eight miles of press there.

With a little ol' lawyer so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be Patrick.
More rapid than eagles, the indictments did fly
And when I saw them the tears sprang to my eyes.

"Out Rove, Out Cheney, Out Libby and Hannah!"
"Out Bush, you old crook, and drag Condie right with you!"
"To the front of the line, you need your hand-cuffs,"
"Now go away, go away with the other crook toughs."

As the quiet sound that so often in Washington comes,
When criminal pols are exposed to the sun,
So too did follow the Fitz on that day.
And I was so glad he'd put them away.

Then with a crashing I heard in Congress that dawn
The sound of 'pukes turning when Bushie was gone.
As I drew in a breath and dared not make a sound
A Fitzgerald glare made them all turn around.

He was dressed all in Justice, his laws he did bring
And his honor still meant he could not be bought with ka-ching!
A bundle of tips he did bring in his pack
Just to make sure the crooks wouldn't be back.

His eyes, how they twinkled! His dimples, how merry!
The world shook when he laughed, cause the 'pukes were all scardy.
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
As he stopped the crook dollars from flowing like snow.

The stump of ol' Hastert he held tight in his teeth,
(That crook thought he could still win on Fitzie's beat).
He had an honest face, and not much belly
For what had gone on, that leak was quite smelly.

He was happy and cheerful, a right jolly ol' man.
And I laughed when I saw him put Bush in the can.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know we had no more to dread.

He spoke not a word, all while doing his work,
Then he quickly indicted them all, every jerk.
And laying a finger aside of his nose,
He listed them all, and up the ladder he rose.

He sprang to the courtroom, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all went, like a jailhouse epistle.
But I heard him exclaim ere he went from our sight,
Merry Fitzmas to all, and for Bush it's airtight!