Terri Schiavo and her family have done us all a favor [View All]

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We have to admit it. Without this horrible situation, how many of us would be prepared, regardless of our age, to make our plans for dispensation known, and in writing? How many of us have all along thought that the people we love the most would "do the right thing" and make certain that our affairs would be in order, and that we were taken care of in those last days of our lives?

We've got to hand it to the Schindlers--they have obviously only their own intentions in mind, and are not thinking of what their daughter would have wanted anymore. Perhaps at some point, they did: I know of no parents who want to see their child pre-deceasing them, and always think of their child in dependent situations--what is more dependent than seeing a child--albeit, a grown woman--needing as much care and help as someone in a persistent vegetative state? Is there no wonder that they might at one time have thought of her as an infant, starting all over again?

I can talk, because my own family has seen this in similar ways. When my brother was 18, he was involved in a car accident that left him severely brain damaged as a result of brain-trauma, with multiple other injuries which should have killed him. His injuries kept him in a coma for nearly three years, and left my mother to take care of him for the rest of his--and her--lives. One of the other boys in the accident died--oh how many of us wish that it could have been my brother. The toll of taking care of him has been tough on my mom, who is now in her mid-70s, and still takes care of him. As for my brother, his emotional level tops out at about 10 years old, and he can not take care of himself at all without help. At the funeral of the boy who passed away, my mother got to talking to his mother, who was very belligerent to the other parents of the other kids. She told her that at least she could go on with the memories of her son and continue to live with that. Having a daily reminder that one of your children is so severely handicapped both physically and mentally is an even more difficult chore to endure.

On another side, I love my cats immensely. As I have for all the cats I've had in the past thirty years. And when the time came for me to let them go, when I knew that their quality of life had disappeared, I collected my wits and took them to the vet for that one last time together, where I could hold them, tell them I loved them, and let the vet administer something to put them quietly to sleep. I've mourned for many of my "kids" in this fashion, and was grateful that I could allow them to die with some dignity.

Oh, but no, we can't give that to the humans among us who are suffering, who are in pain, who are willing to die even if they have to somehow do it themselves. Those terminally ill among us who cringe in fear that their last wishes--to die without pain, without lingering, without suffering--will be blissfully ignored by the ones they think hold them dearest in their hearts.

At least we know, now, how the radical religious right would treat each and every one of us: they would hold on, keep us alive, even if the torment and pain we suffer is visible to the naked eye. They would deny us that last vestige of dignity, of ever finding a peaceful journey into oblivion. They would impose upon us their will, whether we agreed with their philosophy or not. They would ram down our figurative throats all their horrendous belief systems, telling us that we will suffer in hell for all eternity for not believing in their warped philosophy.

It is TIME, now, for all of us to make our wishes known, and to hope that when our time comes, there will be one person we can trust to follow our wishes. We can hope for one judge who will follow the letter of the law and stay true to his profession. We can hope that no one who knows us will ever allow these interlopers into our most private desires and wishes, who will use us for some sort of political statement, and we can hope that someday, we will have the right to go peacefully in whatever fashion we can, no matter how others view that fashion. We must be true unto our own selves, at the very least, so that dignity and death can co-exist in the same world.

Yes, we must thank the Schindlers for showing us all how absolutely terrifying they are now, and for having such little strength of character that they would make their daughter suffer until the very end. And above all, we must thank the Schindlers for something else--the impetus to act for ourselves, for our wishes, for our final moments on Earth. At the least, they are good for that.