Welcome to the General Discussions: Primaries automated switchboard. [View All]

[Tommy_Carcetti]

Welcome to the General Discussions: Primaries automated switchboard. Press 1 for English. Press 2 for Angry Illogical Ranting.

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You have selected Angry Illogical Ranting. Welcome to General Discussion: Primaries. Please make the following selection:

Press 1 for broad-based generalizations.
Press 2 for the strawman fallacy.
Press 3 for subtly inciting hatred against your fellow Democrat.
Press 4 for arguing implausible scenarios just to rile up fear.
Press 5 for gross hypocrisy.
Press 6 for sanctimonious self-righteousness.
Press 7 for pretending to care about things you really don't care about just to suit your own agenda.
Press 8 for mock indignation.
Press 9 for veiled threats.
Press 10 for telling others to recommend your post because getting it on the Greatest Page is the best thing that will ever happen to you in your life and you can now die happy.
Press 11 for crazed mob mentality and herd behavior.
Press 12 for rationalizing your own behavior by claiming that the other side acts much worse than yours.
Press 13 for being an grand embarrassment to your own candidate and being against everything for which he or she actually stands.
Press 14 for circular logic, red herrings and non-sequitors.
Press 15 for TYPING IN CAPITAL LETTERS AND CURSING A LOT!!!!!!!
Press 16 for exaggerating the outcome of current events and otherwise blindly panicking for no reason.
Press 17 for prematurely jumping to conclusions based solely on rumor, innuendo or unsubstantiated evidence.
Press 18 for quoting out of context.
Press 19 for counterproductive behavior that is only going to serve to further divide us down the road.
Press 20 for not actually giving a damn about what your candidate is actually saying because you have worked yourself up into an emotionally frenzied state.

If you wish to repeat these options, you are obviously a troll and clearly want the Democrats to lose. We are in the process of alerting the moderators, and your thread will be locked. Prepare to be tombstoned. IBTL!!! IBTL!!!

If you are looking for calmness, rationality, common sense, unity, coalition building and/or logic, no options exist for such choices. Please hang up and feel disillusioned by your fellow Democrats. We fuck you for your patience. Have a shitty day.