That thing Chris did about only 5 real stars in Hollywood was perfect.
Rock said: "You want Tom Cruise and all you can get is Jude Law? Wait.
“You want Russell Crowe and all you can get is Colin Farrell? Wait.
“Alexander is not Gladiator.
What made it great was at the end when he said something like:
"You want Denzel Washington and all you can get is Chris Rock? Wait."
What made that routine perfect was Chris Rock's own self-deprication.
I'm not finding that last detail in even the positive reviews.
Rock and Penn clash over Law
Ireland Online, Ireland - 6 hours ago
Oscars host Chris Rock infuriated 2004 winner Sean Penn at Sunday night's ... Wait. “You want Russell Crowe and all you can get is Colin Farrell? Wait. ...
http://breakingnews.iol.ie/entertainment/story.asp?j=54569520&p=545698x5Also:
"One of my favorite movies this year was Fahrenheit 9/11. Michael Moore did not get nominated for an Oscar. Right now Michael Moore is wondering, 'I should have made Super Size Me. I've done the research.' "
Partial Transcript (Compiled from USA Today and AmericasBlog)
"Bush is a genius. I mean think about it. He was basically reapplying for his job last year at the same time a movie was being played all across the country showing what a crappy job he did. He got into office and we had a surplus. Now, we're like 70 trillion dollars in debt. Now let's say you worked at the GAP. You're closing out at the end of the day, and your register comes up 70 trillion dollars short. You're gonna get in trouble over that. Not Bush. No, he figured out a way to keep his job.
"Bush did some things you could never get away with at your job, man. ... Just imagine you worked at the Gap. You're $70 trillion behind on your register and then you start a war with Banana Republic 'cause you say they got toxic tank tops over there. You have the war, people are dying, a thousand Gap employees are dead, bleeding all over the khakis, you finally take over Banana Republic, and you find out they never made tank tops in the first place."
http://www.americablog.blogspot.com/Host Chris Rock comes out firing
http://www.usatoday.com/life/movies/movieawards/oscars/2005-02-28-rock-rants_x.htmAlso:
I suggest all who are interested in framing actually study some of his speeches. If the Democratic party could find 4 more Chris Rocks to either host a weekly political news show or to write speeches, I don't think the Republican party with all its linguists could beat metaphors with humor.
I think Chris Rock, Jon Stewert and Bill Maher set the example of how progressives can take control of the debate. Use humor.
http://dailykos.com/story/2005/2/27/204714/118Chris Rock Turns the Oscars into a Blue State Affair
National Ledger, AZ - 19 hours ago
Chris Rock led off the Oscars on Sunday with ... "You're $70 trillion behind on your register, and then you start a war with Banana Republic, cause you say
http://www.nationalledger.com/scribe/archives/2005/02/chris_rock_turn.shtmlMatt Drudge Fails to Bring Down the Oscars
Washington Dispatch, Virginia - Feb 28, 2005
... In the case of Chris Rock and the Oscars, Drudge ... Rock hosted the Oscars to mixed reviews but nonetheless ... then you start a war with Banana Republic 'cause you ...
http://www.washingtondispatch.com/culture/archives/000777.htmlRock's potshots deadly accurate
NorthJersey.com, NJ - Feb 28, 2005
... But Chris Rock had some howlingly funny moments as Oscar host ... and then started a war with Banana Republic on the ... to prove his argument that the Oscars are out ...
http://www.bergen.com/page.php?qstr=eXJpcnk3ZjczN2Y3dnFlZUVFeXk2NzEmZmdiZWw3Zjd2cWVlRUV5eTY2NTk0NzkmeXJpcnk3ZjcxN2Y3dnFlZUVFeXk3A highly judgmental but completely fair look at Sean John-clad ...
Chicago Tribune (subscription) - Feb 28, 2005
THE JOKE: Chris Rock's jab at President Bush ... dollar register deficit and going to war with Banana Republic over non ... year they're going to give the Oscars away in ...
http://metromix.chicagotribune.com/tv/mmx-0502280173feb28,0,5256054.story?coll=mmx-television_hedsOne Dumb Rock
Dummocrats - Feb 27, 2005
So, I'm watching the Oscars and sitting through Chris Rock's opening monologue ... clerk declaring war over non-existant toxic tank tops at Banana Republic. ...
http://www.dummocrats.com/archives/000760.phpRock's debut as host wasn't bad-boy; it was simply bad
Aberdeen American News, SD - Feb 28, 2005
Supposed bad boy Chris Rock delivered a naughty word in ... sentence last night at the Oscars, then followed ... battle between clerks at the Gap and Banana Republic. ...
http://www.aberdeennews.com/mld/aberdeennews/entertainment/special_packages/academy_awards/11013366.htmOscars: The Weeners and Thoughts
Blogcritics.org - Feb 28, 2005
... were created the same year as the first Oscars. ... Chris Rock starts off with a bang, high energy, he's in ... His "Gap vs Banana Republic go to war" schtick, in the ...
http://blogcritics.org/archives/2005/02/28/105541.php Rock's act is raunch and race, half of which was out of bounds on broadcast TV. He still managed to make the industry squirm -- not with his language, which was admirably sanitized, but with his digs at some of showbiz's young stars. If the best a producer can do is get a Tobey Maguire, Jude Law, Colin Farrell or Ja Rule, when they really want Clint Eastwood, Russell Crowe or Denzel Washington, they should just wait until the genuine stars are avail-able, Rock quipped. (Uber-intense presenter Sean Penn, the thinking man's boor, later made the mistake of trying to answer Rock's humorous routine with a somber defense of Law.)
More:
http://www.venturacountystar.com/vcs/entertainment/article/0,1375,VCS_232_3583659,00.htmlOscar shone when Rock got rolling
BY AARON BARNHART
Kansas City Star
The true test of any awards show host is to ask yourself: Would I like to see this person back here next year? By that measure, Chris Rock's first go-round as host for the Academy Awards was a qualified success.
Within three minutes, though, Rock hit his stride. He delivered a rollicking riff on studio executives who, in their impatience to fill a movie role, settle on the wrong actor. “If you want Russell Crowe and all you can get is Colin Farrell, wait!” he said. “If you want Denzel and all you can get is me, WAIT.”
More:
http://www.aberdeennews.com/mld/aberdeennews/entertainment/special_packages/academy_awards/11010208.htm