RE: The homeless. My 10-year old son is making my life very

[acmavm]

uncomfortable right now. He is asking if it is true that homeless people are being put in jail because they are homeless. He is also asking me "why no one cares" what happens to them. I am having a hard time explaining to him why this is happening and why it is that no one cares what happens to the less fortunate in our country. At 10 he understands how much money some people have in this country. He just heard yesterday how Tony Hawk is making ten million dollars a month and he is asking me how that could be. Now, I don't know if Tony Hawk really does earn that much money a month, but if he does I can understand where he is confused. Yeah, they guys a skateboard whiz, but for ten million a month you would expect someone to really be making a change in this world, doing something that really matters, really counts for the betterment of humanity, not sliding down the side of a cement wall. And this is the problem I am having with the child right now. He is of the opinion that no one should go to jail for being homeless (although sometimes its better than being out in the elements probably). And he is appalled that Tony Hawk may be a multi-millioniare, even though he loves to watch him.

Kids can be such a pain in the ass sometimes. And they can make you feel so dumb.

[DuctapeFatwa]

1. Tell him that is the way people with money want it

Better to tell him the truth yourself than have him learn the truth and learn that you lied about it.

[Snow]

2. Take a look at this article...

http://www.alternet.org/story.html?StoryID=16515

might help explain the descriptive end of things a bit, if not the "why" of it.....
Actually, I suppose the why is fairly easy to....wealth is now pwoer, and it's power pretty much unlimited, so the ends of wealth will be to accumulate more...

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

3. I can relate

I was about 10 when my father first took me to the barracks where migrant workers lived. He wa a union organizer and was instrumental in helping to organize the UFW org. The poverty that those people lived in and the conditions they labored under had a lasting effect on me...so much so that my vocation is in the arena of labor rights. Good things come out of curious kids who want to right a societal wrong. Tell him the truth. Tell him greed undermines everything that is good about our accomplishments.

You just never know what it will inspire the kid to do.

In the meantime, I hope your own situation is turning out.

[JohnKleeb]

7. Ive read in his bio that RFK

was telling his kids how lucky they were after they complained one day. BTW I got Schlessinger's bio of him and it really is good and I know the ending sadly already because well its a true story. Yes tell the kid its because of the greed of the nation people can be inspired and your kid has the right stuff.

[trof]

10. You sound like a movie.

Or a book.
I mean it.
Any thoughts along those lines?

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

13. Actually yes

Since my dad's death (6 years ago today) I have been jotting down thoughts periodically and moving towards making a point with it.
Thanks for asking.

[JohnKleeb]

16. Sorry NSMA but I will tell you this he raised a great daughter

You obviously inheirted his heart. I assume UFW was the farm workers union did by chance did he know Cesar Chavez, Mr. Chavez imo is one of the unsung heroes of American history. Now I dont wanna talk about presidential candiates now but I have read that Dennis Kucinich wanted a holiday for Cesar which is totally cool and sorry no link but will look.

[Eloriel]

20. I vote for that!

:toast:

Eloriel

[JohnKleeb]

4. You got a smart kid there acmavm

Hawk makes a lot of money for sure not as much as say A-Rod but he makes a lot for sure.

[tom_paine]

5. Not much to say other than the truth

We're too busy watching TV to give a shit.

We are turning back the clock in this nation back to barbarity and a wealth inequity that would have been at home in 1780s France (or 1890s America).

We are the victims of a Propaganda Machine unequalled in history that makes Josef Goebbels and his Merry Men look like a kid with a megaphone.

The Imperial Subjects of Amerika, collectively have degenerated beyond the poitn where we are capable of feeling anything about anything not in our persoanl life unless the TV tells us 12 times
unless the TV tells us 12 times
unless the TV tells us 12 times
unless the TV tells us 12 times
unless the TV tells us 12 times.

And the TV, now 90% controlled by the Corproate TV Pravda or the Right-Wing Sub-Media has no interest in showing us very much if anything about the less fortunate citizens among us, so for the Imperial Subjects of Amerika, they don't exist.

Perhaps they never existed.

But all that is much too complicated, eh?

Just tell him that we are an Empire now, and that Empires traditionally don't care about the poor and weak.

[DuctapeFatwa]

6. You could also find out who does homeless outreach where you live

And the two of you go volunteer as a team

On edit - it's a teaching moment. I would tell him the truth, but stress that you don't agree with all the choices the society has made, and so the two of you are going to do whatever you can, maybe you can help only a few people, but those few will appreciate it, and you will be setting a good example for other families in your community.

[cherryperry]

8. Please be honest, but

please start out with a rather simple answer. He will probably have another question and then just follow his lead as far as he goes.

Listen, my Dad was a union organizer and my mom was a social worker and, as a result of learning from them I have become a life-long 'Crusader Rabbit' for justice.

Please don't feel dumb; kids love it when you say things right from your heart; they can tell! It sounds like your son already has good instincts and that is due to your parenting; keep it up!

[izzie]

9. tell him what Paul Newman and his wife have done for people.

Let him know there are very good people in this world . All rich are not greedy but it would be nice if more could help. St. Peter will love Paul and Joan when they get there, for what they did to help with what they made.

[grasswire]

11. a great teachable moment...

yes, tell him about people like the Kennedys, who despite being wealthy work their hearts out on behalf of the disadvantaged. Point out the difference between the Kennedys and the Bushes, who suck the planet dry.

As far as the homeless issue is involved, perhaps he could start a letter writing campaign among kids. It would be a very good thing to find him something to do regarding the issue he cares about. Soup kitchen volunteering might be a good thing.

Or maybe even Habitat for Humanity volunteering.

[Resistance Is Futile]

12. Tell the truth

Tell him that the country is run by people who idolize Hitler and Stalin. When he asks who they are, give him a history book.

[Iris]

14. I read once that

if you feel a great amount of pity or sadness for a certain group - like the mentally retarded - you should do volunteer work in that field. I'm not sure what the idea behind that was. Probably something like you get to know the people as individuals.

Maybe your family could help in a soup kitchen this Thanksgiving or Christmas. Or, if that's unrealistic, you could do a soup and sandwich meal once a week and put the money you would have spent on a more elaborate meal aside and donate that money to an organization that works to feed the poor.

I think others on this thread are right. You should make the most of your son's concern. He is learning empathy, which seems to be sorely lacking in our culture right now.

[alaine]

15. I don't envy you.

That's tough to have to explain to him the way the world really is. I guess if I had a child (and believe me, dilemnas like this are one reason I don't, I admire the fortitude of anyone trying to raise kids in this culture) I would tell her or him about addiction, that money is just like ice cream or candy bars to some people, they just can't get enough even though the end result is harmful. I read a New York Times article last week about a philanthropist who donated a kidney to an unknown donor, he just specified that it go to someone "poor and Black", and also the family who died in the plane crash over Kenya, (they were from Atlanta) were said to have been philanthropists as well.

Sounds like a great kid you've got there.

[Karenina]

17. Please give your kid a BIG HUG from me

And you tell him that there's a lady thousands of miles away who thinks he's SO smart to ask the right questions and that she's as PROUD of him as she is of her own kids. And then PLEASE give him a BIG KISS! :kiss:

[AnnabelLee]

18. It sounds like you are raising a remarkable human being

None of the ten-yr-olds I know would be able to make the connections your son is making. I don't know what you should tell him, but I think that you have done such a wonderful job up to now that you will get this right, too.

[RevolutionStartsNow]

19. Uncomfortable, but a good sign

that you are raising a sensitive kid. My daughter is also this way, when she was 9 I took her on a trip to San Francisco and she wept when she saw people sleeping in the streets. This empathy is one of her greatest qualities, and while I hate to see her sad, I do not try to sugarcoat it for her.

As many have suggested here already, this is a good opportunity to talk to him about some of the great people who sacrifice to help others. Teach him to idolize these people rather than Tony Hawk. Also, teach him that not all wealthy people are uncaring. There are many multi-millionaires who do give money to charity, they just don't get as much publicity as they should.

Also there are many things you can do together to make a difference. We adopt a family every year at the holidays, and participate in charity throughout the rest of the year also.

It's a good opportunity to try to teach him that some problems (like homelessness, and hunger) seem immense, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't take small steps to make a difference.

I hate having to teach my kids that sometimes the world sucks. It's one of the worst things about being a parent.

But kids like yours and mine are bound to make a difference.

[Eloriel]

21. Yes, tell your

wonderful child the truth, but go easy with the cynicism that some here have suggested. That comes soon enough with the territory. No need to dump it on him so early. There's always room for hope AND a sense of empowerment.

As difficult or uncomfortable as it may feel to you, please don't let this be a burden. What a privilege to raise this remarkable soul, this compassionate heart in one so young. Let it be your JOY to guide him, uplift him, and yes, teach him.

I like the idea of helping him actually do something about the problem he sees and feels so strongly about. If volunteering in a soup kitchen isn't his (or your) cup of tea, perhaps he could do a little research on the subject, and write to his hero about it. Or perhaps he could find some way to raise money among his friends or the neighbors to donate to a homeless shelter. Or perhaps a clothing drive to take to the nearest shelter. Or --- ????

Let us know how it goes, you lucky, lucky mom.

Eloriel

[Clete]

22. I remember back when there weren't homeles like today.

There were hobos all right or hippies. They were people who chose to be homeless. There was always some kind of affordable shelter around if you needed it and the mentally ill had programs that paid for them to be in hospitals and homes to be cared for. The homeless problem in this country started with Reagan governorship in California and went nationwide with his presidency. It wasn't alleviated with Clinton and it speaks volumes about the drive to eliminate the middle class in this country by the far right.

Tell your little boy that we once had a country that didn't have droves of homeless on the streets and we can have it again if we work for it in a socially responsible manner.