Right...since I got no answers from HEyHEY's *guy* thread...

[dolo amber]

I will ask in my own thread...a question regarding Mr. Pitt's post which reads:



"20 minutes, a book, and a bathroom stall (cigarette optional)



Pooping is an art form."

-------------------------------------------------------------------

And my (unanswered) response:


Ok...that's it. I demand answers.

<climbs on soapbox>

*eh-hem*

WHAT TAKES YOU SO LONG?!?!

Seriously, regardless of what I'm doing in the bathroom, I'm talking...60 seconds, tops. I don't get it. Is every man on earth perpetually constipated? Is it just a *I need some time alone* thing? Is there something more sinister and/or degenerate going on? :spank: And above all...WHY can I never get a straight answer??

I'm quite sure if the first time I asked this, I'd gotten a simple, sensible answer, I would've never given it a second thought. But NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...it's always "Ummm, y'know, just...stuff" or something equally cryptic. What on EARTH takes 20 minutes in the john?? :hurts:

Thank you for your time, I look forward to hearing back from you regarding this important matter. :hi:

[phaseolus]

1. Well....

...sometimes, sitting on a bowl full of human waste concentrates the mind wonderfully. :shrug:

[Kadie]

2. Maybe they are proud of their accomplishment

and take a little time to admire their work? :shrug:

[Redneck Socialist]

3. There is something about filling the entire bowl

or a multiple flusher. :evilgrin:

Hey y'all asked.

[VelmaD]

4. Well, I'm a girl and sometimes it takes time...

for me too. But I don't brag about it. :)

[supernova]

5. Masturbation is always a good choice

:D

[VelmaD]

8. Why yes...

yes it is. ;)

[SOteric]

6. If my brothers are any indication...

It's a contest. A sport. An event designed to prove one's manhood.

[kitkatrose]

16. Sheesh, what're the categories?

Longest turd? Biggest stench? Least amount of uncontaminated water in the bowl? I guess I'm glad I only had one sister. :)

[Blue-Jay]

7. Amber - It's not a question of "taking so long"...

To be completely honest, it's our version of "me time". The actual pooping is usually quick, but what we really enjoy is the few minutes of silence and sports-page-reading.

Ahhhhh. Lovely silence.


EDIT: Did I just give away a secret?

[dolo amber]

10. Dude...

You are *SO* kicked out of the Guy club. :7


;)

[Blue-Jay]

11. Yeah.

I knew I was giving away a state secret, but I did it anyhow. To quote Chris Rock, men only want three things: food, sex, & silence.

Or:

"I'm hungry"
"I'm horny"
"I'm tired of talking"

So, yeah. The poop-break is important.

[FDRrocks]

9. The only time I take 20 minutes of the loo

is when I'm readin something particularly interesting and am particularly comfortable on ye ole throne.

Most of the time I'm good for 3 minutes tops.

[Whitacre D_WI]

12. Well, it takes me a long time...

...to get all the shit off my ass-hair.

[JVS]

13. Usually I am done quickly

But sometimes I like to take more time to enjoy the serenity and placcid nature of the bathroom.

[DS1]

14. I'm dragging you to the next family poo-flinging contest

our half of the 'tree' has been needing a good provider ever since Unkie Cleeter passed away

[Screaming Lord Byron]

15. It's a zen thing. We like to spend time contemplating our art.

and wanking.