underpants
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:08 PM
Original message |
Poll question: Okay just how "redneck" is vacuuming off the porch? |
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Edited on Sun Oct-05-03 02:17 PM by underpants
My Mom is in town and she and my wife went to the new mall to shop (read: wonder around for no apparent reason or goal) so we cleaned up real good.
Our front porch is carpeted from the indoor/outdoor blue carpet (it went well with my old blus/red furniture, I got compliments)I had in my apartment before I moved in here before we got married and my wife scoffed at the idea. Now she loves it and it keeps the dirt/dust out of the apartment really well or really good if you like.
So my last step of cleaning was to take the vacuum out to the front porch and vacuum the carpet. The saying around here is,"Companies coming turn over the cushions and vacuum the porch".
10 is the most "redneck".
ON Edit-Changed "Who" on 10 to "You"
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carpetbagger
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:18 PM
Response to Original message |
1. Depends on the context. |
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On the one hand, it could just be another way for yuppies to so sterilize their environment as to ensure their kids grow up and develop allergy/asthma problems from not having enough exposure to dirt and germs.
But this is a clear function of redneck life. Not pathognomonic like the NASCAR decal, the rotwiler, the Iron-Maidenesque "South Will Rise Again" flag, or chitlins, but clearly tilting in tnat direction. I gave it a three, since I couldn't figure out whether you're slumming (-3) or genuine (+7).
Maybe you could help the group decide by answering one simple question:
Name the items of indoor furniture on your porch.
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underpants
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:23 PM
Response to Reply #1 |
2. Well I don't take a lawnmower with me in my RV to NASCAR races |
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As my wife and I saw on a news report last week. Of course we don't have an RV and we have only gone to one NASCAR race.*
We have two very comfortable green plastic molded lounge chairs (from Lowe's or Target I forget), a blue plastic molded table, a half barrel planter, and a small planter.
Oh and a windchime with half moons and stars.
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carpetbagger
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Sun Oct-05-03 03:21 PM
Response to Reply #2 |
13. I'll stick with "3". You have yet to confuse indoors w/ outdoors. |
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Your NASCAR attendance is noted as sufficient evidence of your identity.
However, this scene is unconvincing. I see no indoor furniture, and thus the vacuuming is not an indication that you blur the line between indoors and outdoors.
I would be happy to raise it to a 4 if there are old beer cans in your planters, 5 if there are any used tobacco products in your planters, and up to 7 if there is more than one type of tobacco product in your planters (e.g. dip and cigarette butts), 8 if the beer cans are filled with spit with dip or chaw mixed in.
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underpants
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Sun Oct-05-03 06:06 PM
Response to Reply #13 |
15. Oh yeah I didn't mention the planter I dump the ashtray into did I? |
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Look I hate a cluttered messy ashtray, we don't smoke inside any more that is why we spend more time on the porch. Yeah I dump the ashes into an empty (the only empty one) planter and I dump almost every other day into the trashcans in the back of the apartment building.
Yikes!
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carpetbagger
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Mon Oct-06-03 12:30 AM
Response to Reply #15 |
18. That's worth a few points. Too bad I can't change my vote. |
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I'd give it a five, like I promised, although your frequent and organized dumping of the ashes and butts gives me a bit of pause.
Get a good night's sleep so you'll be ready for RAW is WAR tomorrow night. You've earned it, and you've proven you'll enjoy it.
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soup
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:23 PM
Response to Original message |
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how many hound dogs did you have to displace first?
did you move the old car seats (aka fine lawn furniture) or just vacuum around them?
use your own electricity - or ran a cord to the neighbors?
It's just too difficult to answer the poll without having all of the facts.
I am tempted to vote 1 based on the info given. Vacuuming sounds kind of citified to me right from the git go.
:shrug: :-)
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underpants
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:29 PM
Response to Reply #3 |
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We live dead in the heart of Richmond proper.
Blocks away from the Museum of Virginia, Daughters of the Confederacy Museum (not that I know what they do or seen anyone ever come in or out of there), and the Va. Museum of Fina Arts (known for the Fabrige exhibit).
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Breezy du Nord
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:23 PM
Response to Original message |
4. Not as bad as leaving the dog on the porch |
underpants
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:33 PM
Response to Reply #4 |
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A broken glass and a weekend trip to Patient First let us know they aren't really fond of vacuums. They aren't allowed outside either.
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Fenris
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:25 PM
Response to Original message |
5. That, my friend, transcends "redneckness" |
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It's a step away from vacuuming the grass, which is the equivalent of redneck divinity! :D
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underpants
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:31 PM
Response to Reply #5 |
9. Apartment, no grass available only ivy |
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LOL
It's really not that bad.
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trof
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:26 PM
Response to Original message |
6. Right idea. Wrong tool. |
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Leafblower. Weedeater if there are BIG dust bunnys.
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underpants
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:30 PM
Response to Reply #6 |
8. No leafblower and no room for it |
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Maybe I can reverse the vacuum or rig it up that way.
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Don_G
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Sun Oct-05-03 02:35 PM
Response to Original message |
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Around here, we use a welcome mat and power wash the porch.
Lowes and Home Depot sells a power-washer for around $100 and I use it every week for little things like washing my car or chasing off the neighbor's pit bull before I mow the lawn.
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HEyHEY
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Sun Oct-05-03 03:17 PM
Response to Original message |
12. Is it redneck..or just crazy? |
Padraig18
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Sun Oct-05-03 04:14 PM
Response to Original message |
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Can your mother tell the State Trooper to 'kiss my ass' without taking the Marlboro from between her lips? :P
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underpants
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Sun Oct-05-03 06:07 PM
Response to Reply #14 |
16. My mother smokes a corncob pipe |
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NO she doesn't but I had you there for a minute didn't I?
She doesn't smoke.
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Wcross
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Sun Oct-05-03 06:32 PM
Response to Original message |
17. I have to mow the driveway! |
underpants
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Mon Oct-06-03 07:22 AM
Response to Reply #17 |
19. Do you ever mistakingly run into a car? |
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