the dirty old man who lives down the street just knocked on my door!

[Lady Effingbroke]

I didn't answer. He is basically a boorish bottom-of-the-bottle dwelling scum-sucking lowlife who doesn't even realize what an uncouth classless pervert he is. He has propositioned me on several occasions, "Hey, baby, wanna go for a spin in my jacuzzi tub?" and hasn't seemed to notice my consistent replies of "NO!!". I'm 35, single, and live alone in a shitty trailer park in the rumbling bowels of Stinkadeener Texas, with little hope of moving elsewhere until I finish school and get my Bu$halmighty community-college degree and, if I'm damn lucky and the person doing the hiring is careless, a pathetic job earning my wretched crust as a meaningless and utterly replaceable cog in our broken health"care" industry.

The neighborhood pervert is in his 60s (at least) and spends his days getting a snootful of booze at the local icehouse and then driving slowly past my pathetic shoebox of a trailer (as seen here)-

and trying to look in the windows to see if I'm "nekkid". Lately I have begun leaving the blinds closed all day even when home to try and maintain some semblance of privacy, however, doing so puts one in mind of a lonely and forgotten pair of shoes placed in their box upon a dank closet shelf. The other option, however, is the ever-popular "goldfish bowl, hey-where's-the-nekkid-chick" effect created when I open even one window blind to let in a little light.

Now I know damn good and well that all of this ain't even a fart in the wind in the larger scheme of things, what with the impending Bu$halypse and all, but right now it's pissing me off since I can't seem to hammer "N-O!!!" through the old goat's sodden (and soddin') skull.

/rant off.

[Dookus]

1. keep a baseball bat

(or a shotgun, if you're so inclined) near the door and have it in hand next time he knocks.

[Lady Effingbroke]

2. thanks!

I have a plan worked out where if someone breaks in I will shine my 1,000,000 candlepower spotlight (left over from my pizza-drivin' days) into their eyes, and while they are thus blinded, hit them over the head with a bat!

[Dookus]

4. sweet

I like that one. Blind 'em, THEN smack 'em.

[Gyre]

11. That's a great plan!

However, allow me to add a suggestion. Call your local sheriff's dept and tell them about your "friend". If he's peeping he's breaking the law (even in Stinkadeener). They'll probably be happy to "create a presence" so the suspect thinks twice before he peeps, or they can have a "little chat" with him. If that doesn't cause a change in circumstances, for the better, then get back to me. I spend my days attempting to send sex offenders to prison, and I do it for a living.

Gyre

[gizmo1979]

3. get a large man hating dog.

They tend to keep away the riff raff.

[salinen]

5. Oh, he's not that bad

open up the blinds and do a slow striptease. He'll never bother you again after the heart attack.

[Lady Effingbroke]

8. HAHAHAHA!!!!

it would surely get rid of him quick!

[achtung_circus]

6. Do you have a large male friend

with a demeanour suitable for scaring the living crap out of the dickweed.

It's sad that it's necessary, but I've done it for a friend. It amounts to telling the dork that he pisses on my lawn at his peril, but it worked. We had a laugh out of it after the fact.

[Lady Effingbroke]

9. yes, my ex-bf is 6'8'" and weighs anywhere from 250-300 depending on

how much junk food he's eaten, plus he owes me a BUNCH of money...hmm... :think:

[WindRavenX]

7. have you notified the cops?

Seriously, you might want to. I'm a small chicka and this would freak me out :scared:

[Lady Effingbroke]

13. that's the next step if he keeps bothering me.

This has been going on sporadically for the past few months, and it's getting worse.:(

[WindRavenX]

15. do it

Please. As another woman, please at least alert the cops. They'll usually drive by to check up.
This guy sounds creepy :(

[flordehinojos]

10. if he is stalking you,you might be able to get a restraining order against

him, or at least get the law involved in telling him that he is not to drive by your trailer, come to knock on your door or call you.
might work.

[Lady Effingbroke]

16. Looks like that is the next step!

I guess this would be counted as stalking. I go out of my way to avoid him!

[ldf]

12. i LIKE you!

you sound like MY kind of trailer trash. and i DON'T mean that in a negative way. :-)

i have lived in trailers several times in my life, usually due to the current economics, so i understand completely.

:hug:

with your obvious intellect AND sense of humor, you will be a welcome asset to any mc-corporate business office. you may even be able to bring a touch of reality to a workplace in desperate need of it.

good luck with that degree. you will be ARMED and DANGEROUS!

[Lady Effingbroke]

19. Thank you so much for the compliments and encouragement!

Sometimes I feel like I am living on the moon here in this overwhelmingly red wasteland. I am having to watch every last drop of gasoline I use and cannot even afford to go to the DU meetups here in Houston, as they are usually held on the other side of town. :-(

[morningglory]

14. You are a good writer. I would think about using that as a first

page and then write about your "career" out in Bushworld with no social security to look forward to.

[Lady Effingbroke]

20. Thank you for the compliments!

I really should write more often, I guess, but I find it difficult to. I have been mostly lurking and learning here at DU and other liberal sites so far. I still have so much to learn, but I am getting better with my command of facts and figures when I discuss current events with people, especiall Shrubophiles.

edit: typo

[HEyHEY]

17. "boorish bottom-of-the-bottle dwelling scum-sucking lowlife"

You could be talking about anyone in the lounge

[kodi]

18. invite him in to watch a dvd with you: Charlize Theron in "Monster"

if he ever comes back, you know what to do.

[Catshrink]

21. We'll all be living in trailers if we can't stop the Bush Reich!

that's what they want, a return to the days of the robber barons. We'll all be serfs to the corporate masters.

Oh, and btw, I too love your writing. And I agree that you should call the cops and get a report on file. Start a paper trail on the ODB. Find out if there are other women he harasses.

[Lady Effingbroke]

22. Yes, I finished re-reading "It Can't Happen Here" today.

I'm afraid it, in large part, already has.

The only way I can see to get ourselves out of this mess is to bite the corporate hand that bleeds us and buy blue and "get off the grid" as much as possible. Serfdom sucks, and we all deserve better!

edit:typo :+