Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:50 PM
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If I worked in a department store, I would..... |
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You fill it in!
Ok if I worked in a department store, I would speak in a faux British accent at random times, ask people if they're being served, whip out a measuring tape and start measuring their inseam (especially if I worked in electronics or fine china), and build crazy props like rotating cups on a bra.
What would you do?
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WI_DEM
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:53 PM
Response to Original message |
1. I would be a "floor walker" with a carnation in my lapel and |
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when someone came up to me I would have a big grin and say, "YEEEEEESSSSS"
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Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:56 PM
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WI_DEM
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:06 PM
Response to Reply #9 |
Lavender Brown
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:53 PM
Response to Original message |
2. I would, and did, pretend to feel faint during peak hours |
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so I could go sit in the break room until the crowds and long lines diminished. }(
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Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:56 PM
Response to Reply #2 |
8. Why didn't I ever think of that? |
NoPasaran
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:53 PM
Response to Original message |
3. I would spray perfume in their eyes |
Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:56 PM
Response to Reply #3 |
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I've always wanted to be a perfume sprayer, but I know my passive-aggressiveness would get me canned within the day.
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NoPasaran
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:58 PM
Response to Reply #7 |
13. Why do they only spray perfume? |
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Who is to say that patrons wouldn't appreciate being sprayed with fine imported mustard just as much? :shrug:
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Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:59 PM
Response to Reply #13 |
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THAT would be fun!
I'd never ask permission, I'd just spray people.
"Let's see, YOU smell stinky (spray, spray), and YOU smell stinky (spray, spray) and YOU need some perfume (spray, spray)."
And I'd giggle too much doing it. I'm telling you I wouldn't last one shift.
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yvr girl
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:53 PM
Response to Original message |
4. I argue in a British accent |
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I can't help myself.
I have nothing on topic to post. I'll go away now.
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Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:58 PM
Response to Reply #4 |
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Hey, talk in a British accent here in the lounge. That'd be fun!
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Left Is Write
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:54 PM
Response to Original message |
5. I would put my hair up, wear 1950s skirts and blouses, and |
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pretend the customers were in a Twilight Zone time warp.
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Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:55 PM
Response to Reply #5 |
6. Oh GOD that would be fun. |
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Get a big wig, too. HUGE flouncy skirt, tiny waisted, button up blouse with a Peter Pan collar.
What a riot.
Be sure to have a hanky in your tiny purse.
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BlueJazz
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:57 PM
Response to Original message |
10. Every so often, when I was with a customer, I'd say... |
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"Look, it's Joe DiMaggio!" and then bang on the counter loudly and make Strange noises...BEEEEP!!!....AHHH!!...WhOOO!!
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Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 02:58 PM
Response to Original message |
11. I'm seeing why everyone on this thread either doesn't work |
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in a department store, or doesn't any longer.
:D
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Lavender Brown
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:00 PM
Response to Reply #11 |
16. I wasn't fired, surprisingly |
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I quit the glamourous milieu of the department store curtain department to move to NYC. :P
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BlueJazz
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:01 PM
Response to Reply #11 |
18. LOL!..Could you imagine us ALL working in the same store. |
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Actually...you know..we may have hit on something.
Geez..The store would be so weird and strange that it would be Hip!
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Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:05 PM
Response to Reply #18 |
21. I'm telling you, DUers need to do the following |
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1. Start a church (cha-CHING!!!)
2. Sell Jesus merchandise (Jeez-Its, Jesus toilet paper, etc.) to fundies.
3. Start a department store. You are right, it would be SO wild and wonky, it'd be totally hip. The problem would be keeping ourselves from killing each other. Especially during the primaries.
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BurtWorm
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:00 PM
Response to Original message |
15. Write notes to co-workers that begin "Dear Sexy Knickers" |
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"I don't 'arf fancy you!"
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Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:00 PM
Response to Reply #15 |
17. What about if you worked in Wal-Mart? |
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You could go around dropping a couple boxes of condoms into people's carts when they weren't looking.
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BurtWorm
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:03 PM
Response to Reply #17 |
20. Do they sell those at Wal-Mart? |
Schema Thing
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:03 PM
Response to Original message |
19. Walk around with a pulsating blue light in my pants |
Bok_Tukalo
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:07 PM
Response to Original message |
23. Immediately reject state issued ID's presented as "obvious forgeries" |
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and only accept public library cards.
Oh, and I would page myself over the intercom ... often.
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Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:08 PM
Response to Reply #23 |
25. ROFL, page yourself, you made me snort. |
JohnKleeb
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:07 PM
Response to Original message |
24. try to get a date with one of the cute girls that work there |
Bouncy Ball
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:08 PM
Response to Original message |
26. We could put on fashion shows! |
Bertha Venation
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:11 PM
Response to Original message |
27. . . . offer the best customer service the place had ever seen. |
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Provision of excellent customer service is a dying trade. Makes me mad.
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mongo
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:27 PM
Response to Reply #27 |
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Although I don't provide much customer service to anyone unless they ask for it -- we go on the premise that most people would rather pick out a dildo on their own.
We even have a sign up to that effect - "We don't bother our customers, but we would be happy to assist you. Please ask for help if you have any questions"
I actually like it when people ask for help. I will put batteries in toys, give my reccomendations, etc. Due to our market, we carry a lot of low end toys - and spending $5.00 more for a better version of a toy can lead to a lot more satisfaction!
One of the few times I will bother the customers is the 50+ guy in the cock rings. There are many different styles and some education is really helpful to finding the right one for you.
That, and to steer people away from the desensitizing creams. If someone walks right up to it, grabs it and brings it to the register, I'll sell it to them, but if they are studying the packages, I'll suggest lanacane from the drug store instead.
There is a local dept store in town that still gives decent customer service. If I ever need any more employees, I think I'll try to steal someone from there.
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Shakespeare
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:13 PM
Response to Original message |
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I worked at Dillards for a couple of years a long time back, and absolutely despised that job. My poor feets were never the same after having to stand IN FREAKING HEELS for 8+ hours a day.
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mongo
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Mon Mar-21-05 03:29 PM
Response to Reply #28 |
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and you can even watch TV on the security monitor if there is no one in the store.....
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DU
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Mon May 13th 2024, 11:00 AM
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