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Okay, DUers, check into my soap opera...

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Hobarticus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-12-05 01:34 PM
Original message
Poll question: Okay, DUers, check into my soap opera...
...and tell me if I'm over-reacting. I trust you folks.

My friend (I'll call him Bill) recently divorced his wife after ten years, three or four of those last years were spent chasing tail. Literally, he made it a hobby; he had posted nude pictures of himself on chat boards, drove out of town for meetings, the whole scuzzy nine yards.

When I found out about all this, I blew it off. After all, it wasn't any of my business. But, I did ask him several times why he was still married if he wanted to live this way, and let him know that that it seemed to me he was trying to accomodate for being a shitty human being to his wife by banging everything he could.

So, he comes to visit my town last year. Immediately he starts salivating over some of my friends, and my wife's friends, married, committed or otherwise. He's acting like banging every single woman in his sight is a game. I tell him to chill the f*ck out, in no uncertain terms; I have to live here. He's like, 'what?'

One night this past year, myself, my wife, another couple and Bill went out. Bill starts hitting blatantly on my friend's wife (I'll call her Sue). Sue's husband, a VERY good friend (and co-worker, no less) calls bullshit, Bill doesn't pick up on it. I corner Bill in the bathroom and tell him to back way off. NOW. Again, he's like, "huh?"

Later that night, Bill mentions to my wife that he can't believe that I said anything to him. My wife says that he's lucky that he didn't get decked, and that he was way out of line. It made everyone uncomfortable. He's still, "huh?"

So, I've brushed my friend back for hitting on another friend's wife. Noble enough. Embarrassing, and it made me angry that I had to do it, but I think everything's fine.

Bill and I lose touch. I'm calling him, dropping him lines....nothing. I figure he's pissed, and he'll get over it.

Run into Sue about a month later, and she tells me that she talks to Bill every day. I'm flabbergasted. So not only does Bill keep in contact with a married woman that I told him to steer clear of, but he's blowing off my messages.

Bill and Sue talk every day, they're oh-so-chummy...and it's bothering her husband (my other friend and co-worker). Worse, this co-worker's in a position to wreck my job. I've pointed this out to Bill....again, he's like, "huh?"

Bill's trying to move to this side of the state to be closer to his home town, and has been through my town twice to interview for a job...I've heard nothing from him each time. But, Sue has.

So, I'm cutting the ties with Bill. Life's too short. The guy's a shitty friend, and he's potentially shitting where I eat.

This is killing me. I'm deathly loyal to friends, but enough's enough.

So, who's the bigger asshole: me, or Bill?



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kick-ass-bob Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-12-05 01:37 PM
Response to Original message
1. I haven't seen you do anything wrong in what you have said.
He didn't like seeing what you pointed out - because it was true.
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GiovanniC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-12-05 01:39 PM
Response to Original message
2. A Case Could Also Be Made For Sue
You're just a guy who introduced this little parasite into the ecosystem... but that's not necessarily your "fault". Bill is an idiot but he's free to go after anyone he wants to.

Sue, however, is a married woman who is consorting with a man whose intentions are obvious, over the objections of her husband.
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Hobarticus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-12-05 01:42 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. Yeah, I'm not keen on her right now, either...
It's obvious to anyone involved that this is a problem, and she's blissfully trucking along like nothing's wrong. Not blaming her, but she's certainly facilitating the potential for trouble.
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demnan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-12-05 01:40 PM
Response to Original message
3. Drop your "friend"
And if Sue wants this ass, her husband is better off without her too.
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nothingshocksmeanymore Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-12-05 01:44 PM
Response to Original message
5. Sounds like a psychopath
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Lisa0825 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-12-05 01:50 PM
Response to Original message
6. I'm a very loyal friend too, but....
I can only be friends with someone I can respect, and Bill has certainly done enough to warrant losing your respect. You were loyal to him longer than he deserved.
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amazona Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-12-05 01:53 PM
Response to Original message
7. sounds like bill and sue are getting it on
My advice is to distance myself from Bill and possibly even consider looking for a new job. I don't see anything good that can come from Sue and Bill talking every day. I don't even talk to my partner or my best friend every day.

Why are people such PITAs?

The conservation movement is a breeding ground of communists
and other subversives. We intend to clean them out,
even if it means rounding up every birdwatcher in the country.
--John Mitchell, US Attorney General 1969-72


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Hobarticus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-12-05 01:54 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. I don't even want to consider that possibility...
Maybe that's why the whole scene makes me so damn angry.
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LeftCoast Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-12-05 01:55 PM
Response to Original message
9. Bill's one of those people I call "Human Hurricanes"
You know the type, they blow into your life with little warning and generally cause random destruction all around.
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