Judging Restaurants

[hyphenate]

What criteria do you use when testing out a restaurant? What element is crucial in your judgement?

My own points:

Smell. I've walked into places where the overwhelming smell is bleach. I don't care how clean you expect your eatery, but if you don't get rid of an offensive odor like bleach, you've lost me as a customer.

Ambiance. Not as crucial, but frankly, if I'm a guest at your place, I don't want to have my conversations overheard at the next table, or across the room. Some padding will absorb the sound, allowing for some privacy, but if you've essentially got card tables and fold out chairs, I'm outa there.

Noise level. This relates to the above, but I have found that restaurants where there are a lot of children tend to be too noisy for me. That is, of course, unless I'm in a McDonald's or a Chuck E. Cheese, and expect a lot of kids around. If you're in a fairly nice place, kids need to be seated and eating, NOT screaming, yelling or throwing temper tantrums.

Wait Staff. Very rarely do I encounter a waiter or waitress who aggravates me. They've got a job to do, and as long as they get my order right, that's great. I always tip between 15-20%, so I do expect my server to make sure I've got what I need. Once, about a year ago, I was in a Pizzeria Uno, and a very large group came behind us. We were halfway through our meal, and suddenly, service stopped. Our waitress had begun to wait on the large party, and left us stranded for over 1/2 hour without any apology or anyone to help us. If the waitress knew that such a large party was going to disrupt service for her other customers, she should have asked one of the other servers to take either her other customers or the large group.

Food. For the most part, I'm not that adventurous when it comes to food, so I might order similar foods in different places. It gives me a chance to compare my favorite dishes in different settings. As I am eating, one of my main concerns is salt content. If I can actually taste the salt in a dish, it annoys me and is a major point on whether I will order something again. I will usually give a restaurant more chances if this is the case, and in cases where the restaurant is one that I visit frequently, I make note of the dish that was not to my standards, and make certain I don't order it again. If the restaurant is one that I go to often, I have obviously found some of the other fare better and more to my liking.


So how do you judge restaurants? Or do you like just about anything?

[alarimer]

1. Pretty much the same way

except I tend to prefer places that look like complete holes-in-the-wall because they tend to have the best food (not always, but it's a good general rule). Noise level also HAS to include music. If it is too loud to talk over, I won't be coming back.

[SmokingJacket]

2. Do they get everything from the Marriot truck?

You know, the same breaded chicken breast, the same squishy rolls with butter pats, the same ice berg lettuce salad.

Actually, ordering a green salad is a great test. The one place it doesn't work is my favorite Japanese restaurant: pure iceberg and mealy tomato (comes free with the meal), but the hibachi is top notch.

[philosophie_en_rose]

3. I'm pretty easily satisfied.

My restaurant criteria:

1. Be clean. Please clean the table and surrounding area. If anything used is left on the table (napkins, etc), please take it away and wipe the table off. As long as it's clean, I'm fine.

2. Please discretely tell people to behave, including that yakking moran on her cell phone or dad ignoring his smelly (poopy) baby.

3. Please check to see if we need anything, especially water.

4. Please bring what I ordered, with the sauce/ dressing/ etc on the side like I asked. If it's tolerable, I'll eat it. But if you send me a 8 ounce piece of gristle, I'm sending it back. (I'm looking at you, Applebees!)

5. Please don't spit in my food.

6. Please calculate the bill correctly.

7. Please don't speak to your friends, while you're helping me. Joking with coworkers or acknowledging friends that you see is one thing, but having long personal conversations with random people is just rude.

[MountainLaurel]

4. On that last one

I was in a restaurant yesterday afternoon, before their busy time I suppose, where you could hear the wait staff in the kitchen, from the seating area. Squealing teenage girls to be specific. It was the first time I was in a restaurant where the staff was louder than the patronage.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

5. If it fits into my diet.

No spicy, no tomatoes, no bell peppers, no shellfish. And keep it CLEAN. And not too much salt, either.

No tomatoes basically means no Italian places. I am sure there are places that have Italian non-tomato laden food, but I don't know what they are.

And if I'm lucky the portions will be so humongous that I can take it home in a doggie bag and amortize the cost divided into two or even THREE meals.

I was one of the people posting in the latest flame war over obese people. I am a very picky eater, do not have a big appetite and I'm fat.

[GoneOffShore]

6. Some of the same and some different

I go to restaurants that have adventurous chefs who make a point of using seasonal, local ingredients. I have no issues with salt, food allergies or 'interesting ingredients'. I learned that working in a restaurant - "I'm the chef - taste this."

Decor is important - it adds to the experience.

Totally interested in the cleanliness of the place, though I've eaten in very good places with dirty bathrooms and not given it a second thought.

Service issues for me are important - mainly because I spent 10 years earning my living as a waiter. But I'm remarkably tolerant if I can see that the server is doing their job, even if the kitchen is "in the weeds" or "dans le merde".