Anybody have any funny jokes or pics to spare?

[LynzM]

Ha, this is the Lounge, like that's even a question...

I'm grumpy and tired, anybody have anything fun to share? I think Zornhau would really appreciate it if I were in a better mood by the time he gets home... :rofl:

[Dangerously Amused]

1. Hey. The new vid out from Weezer, "Pork & Beans," is pretty entertaining:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muP9eH2p2PI

:hi:

[nemo137]

2. George Bush is in a briefing during the early days of the Iraq War with Rummy

Rummy tells him that three Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq that day, and Bush looks gobsmacked and sits there with his head in his hands. Rummy's never seen the president so upset, and stands there awkwardly for a minute, until Bush raises his head and asks "How many is a Brazillion?"

[Name removed]

3. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[bigwillq]

4. That is awful.

But I can't stop laughing. :rofl:

[redqueen]

12. What'd I miss?!

Who posted that? PM please?

Pretty please?

[bigwillq]

19. It was a picture of this girl

who was in her undies. She was in the bathroom and she was taking a picture of herself.

The captain read "Next time you're trying to look hot, make sure you flush the toilet" (summarized of what it said)

In the toilet, you could see a turd.

:rofl:

[snailly]

9. Oh MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!

What the flippin' flying holy hell?!?!?!?! Jesus Christ that's some funny shit. No pun intended.
UGH, I'll be laughing at this mess at 3 in the morning.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

5. Here:

[LynzM]

25. XKCD!

Yay! :bounce: Love the peeps one, too...

[triguy46]

6. try these on for size

and



and

[LynzM]

26. Awwwwww....

I lurves me some kidden pics :D

[oxbow]

7. ok

[LynzM]

27. Hahaha

That last one is too cute!

[yellowdogintexas]

8. Long but very funny:

Through the eyes of a child.
Children's Bible in a Nutshell

In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says, 'The Lord thy God is one, but I think He must be a lot older than that. Anyway, God said, 'Give me a light!' and someone did. Then God made the world.

He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet. Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden. Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn't have cars.

Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel. Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.

One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check.

After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat.

Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh's people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable. God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti. Then he gave them His Top Ten Commandments. These include don't lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor's stuff. Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more: Humor thy father and thy mother.

One of Moses' best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.

After Joshua came David. He got to be king by killing a giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn't sound very wise to me.

After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets. One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed upon the shore. There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don't have to worry about them.

After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the star of the New Testament. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn. (I wish I had been born in a barn, too, because my mom is always saying to me, 'Close the door! Were you born in a barn?' It would be nice to say, 'As a matter of fact, I was.')

During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Republicans. Jesus also had twelve opossums. The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him.

Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount. But the Republicans and all those guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn't stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead.

Any way's, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again. He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is foretold in the book of Revolution..

[DS1]

10. what? no thanks at all?

mad

[LynzM]

11. Sorry dude....

Passed out on the couch shortly after posting... guess what I really needed was some sleep... :(

[Midlodemocrat]

14. What did you post?

The deleted message?

PM please.

[LynzM]

15. It was the pic...

Of the girl who took a myspace pic without flushing the toilet first. Iiew.

[DS1]

17. Sanitized with Mod-Friendly Butterfly Bowl Cleaner

[LynzM]

18. Hahaha...

Thanks! :rofl:

[krispos42]

13. I might be able to find a couple...

[LynzM]

24. Love the quantum cat!

And :wtf: to the Armor of God PJs... I've seen them before, but... wow.

[PassingFair]

16. Be VERY aware of your MySpace BACKGROUND shots!!

Don't let this happen to YOU!

[Dr. Strange]

28. Well...

that's probably better than the turd shot.

But still...

:rofl:

[democracyindanger]

20. Blind guy walks into a store

with his seeing-eye dog. All of a sudden, he starts swinging the dog over his head in a circle by it's leash. The shocked clerk asks, "What are you doing?!?" Blind guy says, "Just having a look around."

[DS1]

22. i laughed out loud

[datasuspect]

21. a rabbi walks into a bar with a frog on his shoulder

the bartender asks, "where'd ya get that?"

the frog says, "Brooklyn, there's loads of 'em."

[LynzM]

23. LOL

:rofl: