Hey... I need to talk something out for a bit.

[Writer]

I hope that this will help me focus on the writing I will do this week... I have 25 pages to write this week and another 30+ to write next week. I also have reading and a little bit of BS work on top of that.

I've been very down since last week's "heated exchange." I know what the Prof. did was awful - truly awful. Perhaps only now I'm realizing just how awful it was. Talk about a way to rape someone's dignity! While I logically understand that what he does not define me as a student or as a woman, I still feel like lesser a person. Like I'm less worthy of respect. I'm trying to find other professors and accomplishments to focus on in order to keep me looking forward, but of course that's difficult as it's only my first year in this program (I don't have enough other accomplishments under my belt yet.)

One thing that helps me is that I know that there are prof's in the department who have my back and are keeping an eye on things. I'm very grateful for that. I also have the support of my cohort and of other doc students - that also is a relief. I know that I'm not alone, but I still feel so fucking worthless. What can I focus on in order to pick myself back up and be able to work?

Trying to move on,

~Writer~

[Tuesday Afternoon]

1. Do you have a link to the latest installment... I think I missed

his latest bad boy behavior. In all seriousness, keep looking ahead and focus on the tasks at hand.

[Orsino]

2. I would ask, again...

...that you carry and use a recording device at any and all meetings with the prof.

Perhaps the rest of the department really does have your back (and that's a very nice thing to focus on, for what it says about you), but document, document, document...please. He keeps surprising you, so I hope you won't just assume that his future behavior will be manageable without evidence.

[Symarip]

3. WHOA

DO NOT DO THAT.

Most states have privacy laws that will fuck you sideways if anyone does this. I speak from personal experience. By and large, it is illegal to tape anyone if they have not consented.

[Midlodemocrat]

4. Not true. Only one person has to consent in a lot of states.

Obviously, the one doing the taping would have consented.

[Orsino]

5. There's a good point here, though.

Yes, one party's consenting is usually (always?) enough. However, there are often more serious restrictions on the use of such a recording.

The goal, though, would be merely to get anything incriminating on tape (if, of course, one-party consent is legal at all in the state). One might not then be allowed to post the recording as a public podcast, of course, but if the need arose, the fact that the recording exists at all can get it subpoenaed as evidence. Presumably, that would get around any regulation on public use.

If the need arose, though, I assume that the OP might already be consulting a lawyer, who could advise on how (or whether) to use the recording.

[Writer]

6. Nope... no recordings, no lawyers, no escalating the drama.

I've been in contact with the Assoc. Dean and he's aware that Prof. Douchebag and I argued last week. He also knows that my sole goal is to move into a healthier working situation.

Prof. Douchebag knows deep down that he was a disgusting, horrible douchebag. He also sees me walking out the door and that has impacted him. I had class yesterday with Douchebag and the Assoc. Dean (they co-teach) and the Douchebag was less-than-douchebaggy, all the while, the Assoc. Dean kept writing little notes on pieces of paper and stuffing them into his pocket. My cohort has an eye on him, too.

I will not give the Douchebag any more effort beyond what I owe him as his research assistant. I am just trying to deal with the emotions surrounding this. I wish I didn't feel so down about it all.