Hold me. I'm hypertestosteroned and frisky.

[ForrestGump]

Hey, you never know 'til you try. Truth in Advertising, you know.

[SOteric]

1. Are you curious to know

how we're gonna rate this thread...?

[ForrestGump]

2. Um.....no?

"Why do you ask?," he says, after discovering that you can only rate a thread once........

[WhataBildeberger]

4. and how does this thread

have a higher rating than the ORIGINAL?

I think I'll have to join the GUINEA PIG in his WHAM!-accompanied crying jag.

[ForrestGump]

6. Hey, you grouch,

put down the gerbil and back away slowly......

[WhataBildeberger]

7. oh yeah?!?

BOOGA BOOGA!

[ForrestGump]

10. Run away! Run away!

He's broken out the Rumsfeld mask!

[catzies]

3. Hold ME.

If love was oil, I'd be a quart low.

Elvis is dead, and I ain't feelin' so good either.

[ForrestGump]

5. That's sad!

Feel better......Elvis told me to tell you that....

[canuck]

8. I think it may be time for you to

BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS!
BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS!
BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS!
BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS!
BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS!
BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS! BUY THINGS!

[ForrestGump]

9. It's possible -- my ratings are plummeting on this thread

[SOteric]

11. I steadfastly

refuse to rate this thread. I'm too curious to see what rating you'll get from the average reader.

Personally, I think your ratings would go up markedly if you put in a few good puns. But maybe that's just me.

[WhataBildeberger]

12. so what are you saying?

The thread could benefit from a little pun-tang?

<ducks and covers>

[ForrestGump]

14. Okay, girls, let's go get him!

Oops....I called them 'girls'....

[WhataBildeberger]

16. OMIGAWD!

What did you DO to that poor guy?!?

[SOteric]

17. That explains a lot

about your 'is it up yet?' post of earlier today.

[WhataBildeberger]

20. very interesting

coming from the woman with the most phallic avatar yet.

[SOteric]

21. At least

I could figure out how to make the avatar function work.

[ForrestGump]

23. It's needle envy

Very common pathology. I've seen it before.....

[ForrestGump]

22. Hey!

That's a personal question!

Or does having 1000+ posts also entitle you to make such queries?

[ForrestGump]

13. Hmm

Puns. Puns.

Okay.

There was this milk jug, see, made out of china. It had a mohawk. It liked to crack puns that made all the other chinaware just crack up (ha! a pun within a pun! you're good, boy! ). Remember, it had a mohawk. And a safety-pin through its lip. And a leather jacket. Yes, it was a piece of pun-crockery!

No, wait a minute, that's not quite right. Forget that. please.

There was this lady, right? Called Betty Crocker, right? And she had this son, who had a mohawk.....


EDIT: darned unintentional smileys!

[SOteric]

15. Obviously

you've got too much on your plate to pitchyer best effort.

[ForrestGump]

18. Graphic representation of my innermost feelings:

[SOteric]

19. and mine...

[Capn Sunshine]

24. OK

NOW TURN YOUR HEAD AND COUGH

[ForrestGump]

25. Help!! He's got me by the....

no....not the glove....the glove!....beware, the glove!

Hey, no wonder my approval rating on this thread is plummeting. It's down to 2 already. I feel like Bush, only smarter, taller, infinitely more handsome, younger, more coherent (barely), and not drunk. Let's see if I can get that rating into the negatives....

[MaryBear]

26. LOL!

You all are too funny!

:hi:

:beer:

[ForrestGump]

27. Hiya!

Then how come our ratings are slipping so terribly?

Typical....I blame the Neilsen people. Same thing happened to "MASH," "Cagney and Lacey," and "Quantum Leap."

[MaryBear]

28. Ummm.

Your ratings aren't slipping. Did you notice where you started? That's where you are. Courage, Forrest.