skip fox
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Sat Apr-09-05 04:11 PM
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Headlines for the New Millennium, April 9, 2005 |
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Edited on Sat Apr-09-05 04:41 PM by skip fox
Bush Claims Canonized by Pope in Secret Ceremony
Twisted News, The Vatican. Ap. 9. In a press conference today Persident Bush maintained he was canonized by the late Pope in a top-secret ceremony during his last trip to The Vatican. "Not even his muck-a-muck cardinals knew nothing about it," claimed the President, stating the ritual occured in a hidden back chamber of the Pope's living quarters and saying it was like an initiation into a fraternity. "I had to swear with three fingers in a secret salute and spit on my hand then slap my head and memorize a whole bunch of secret stories or something and read all the code books so I could recognize other secret saints when I saw them," Bush said.
When told by a spokesman for The Vatican that such an occurance was impossible for at least a dozen reasons, Bush said, "THAT's what the Pope told me, He said that people wouldn't believe me cause they hate freedom and things, and they don't want me to be a saint cause of all the discounts I might get or something." As the reporters visiblibly attempted to stifle their reaction, Bush quickly added, "They're America haters, I think."
When the newspeople, attendants, and guards broke in hysterical laughter, the President marched off the dias and left the room.
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whistle
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Sat Apr-09-05 04:19 PM
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skip fox
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Sat Apr-09-05 04:29 PM
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2. Laura buys GW a Texas-Sized Pope Belt-Buckle |
Johnny Noshoes
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Sat Apr-09-05 05:53 PM
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if I ever can afford to travel to Europe again I swear I'm gonna tell people one of two things - I'll say I'm Canadian or I'm from New York City.
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whistle
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Sat Apr-09-05 06:17 PM
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4. How about: Saint Shrub the Mendacious? |
DemGirl7
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Sat Apr-09-05 08:58 PM
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5. Saint Chimpy, the patron Saint of Arrogant morons |
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Edited on Sat Apr-09-05 08:59 PM by DemGirl7
That is Bush's new nickname....
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DU
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Fri May 10th 2024, 03:18 PM
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