The semi bi-annual recurring Let's Just Make Shit Up about Hugo Chavez thread

[EFerrari]

dedicated to devilgrrl, the LJMSUAHC thread originator. Happy Holidays, devilgrrl and, batter up!



Tribute of the current to its source:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x2378097

[harun]

1. Vive Chavez!!! (Before they lock thread for call-out.)

[EFerrari]

3. Not a call out. devilgrrl put the first one up in this tradition.

Hugo Chavez stole my hubcabs. :hi:

[devilgrrl]

51. Hugo Chavez broke my Peanuts Thermos

What a dick!!!!

[EFerrari]

63. Hugo Chavez stole my milk money

Cheney him!

[FarLeftRage]

2. He luvs henry "the third world killer" kissinger...

Wait a minute, no he doesn't... IBTL

[EFerrari]

5. Hugo Chavez bugged Kissenger's accent.

[FarLeftRage]

8. Yes, he did...

[FarLeftRage]

6. He got me fired from my job...

N/T...

[EFerrari]

40. Hugo Chavez gave my job to an illegal alien.

[H2O Man]

4. He is a monster.

He eats children for breakfast, even on mornings he sleeps late. Plus, he lied our country into the war in Iraq. And he oppresses billionaires.

[Mafia Killer]

7. OH NO !

I just loaned him 50 bucks !
guess I won't see that again.

[EFerrari]

91. Better hide your women. Here comes Hugo Chavez!

[EFerrari]

14. Hugo Chavez does not tip!

lol

:hi:

[Cerridwen]

18. When he eats at Olive Garden, you mean?

lol

:hi:

[EFerrari]

25. Hugo Chavez banned Happy Meals in San Francisco!

:cry:

:hi:

[Cerridwen]

31. That was him?!

The bastid!

Those poor children. Who will think of the children?! Oh the humanity!

:cry:

:hi:

[H2O Man]

33. Ah, the children!

The Hugoburglar forces them to eat Unhappy Meals!

[EFerrari]

34. LOL

As our free press reports weekly, over and over and over.

[KansDem]

121. And he picks his teeth at the table before leaving the restaurant!

Really! It's gotten to the point that when he enters a restaurant, the maitre d' will hide the toothpick dispenser!

[fascisthunter]

187. lol

[Cerridwen]

9. He stole my sense of humor!

Now I truly am a "humorless feminist"!

:cry:

[EFerrari]

36. Hugo Chavez outlawed "Sisterhood is Powerful"

and filled libraries with "Tess of the d'urbervilles".

@sshole!

[Cerridwen]

46. LOL

Okay. All I have to say to that is LOL.

:rofl:

[scarletwoman]

10. Chavez made Obama continue the bush* tax cuts for millionaires!

[Name removed]

11. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[scarletwoman]

15. Chavez made EFerrari obsessed!

[mitchtv]

23. he cheated on me

to go out with EFerrari

[EFerrari]

26. Ha! I finally won one!

:yoiks:

[EFerrari]

24. Hugo Chavez said "take me to my leader".

lol

[scarletwoman]

28. I *KNEW* it! Chavez is into kinky sex!

:P

[EFerrari]

32. I heard Hugo Chavez has a time share at the Playboy Mansion.

Now, that is socialism!

:P

[scarletwoman]

35. Hah! Chavez writes letters to the Penthouse Forum!

[EFerrari]

37. Hugo Chavez is the third plumber!

:rofl:

[scarletwoman]

42. Hugo Chavez cleaned my pipes!

[EFerrari]

That sounds dangerous. Hugo Chavez better have good insurance!

[Kurovski]

148. Chavez outlawed DUzy's!

Which is a goddam shame.

:rofl:

[EFerrari]

119. Venezuela is where my interests in Latin America and in propaganda

intersect. It could have been any number of countries but at this time, the disinfo about Venezuela is particularly interesting.

Disinfo like this example that Michael Moore outs about Cuba here:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=439&topic_id=32629&mesg_id=32629

It's really pretty amazing how near Latin America is and how little we know about it up here. It's a little like not knowing anything about Los Angeles when you live in San Francisco.

That and I am Hugo Chavez's brainwashed zombie. :)

[Dreamer Tatum]

12. He's a dictator. That's not made up. It's the law of the land.

:hi:

[Cerridwen]

16. Citation and snippet of law, please.

[EFerrari]

17. Hugo Chavez did not say "Mother, may I, the bastard.

Merry Christmas, Dreamer. :)

[petronius]

13. Is that the guy who makes sure to eat at least one endangered species in every meal?

:shrug:

[Cerridwen]

19. Naw. He just eats at Olive Garden. See upthread.

:D

[EFerrari]

29. Hugo Chavez ate my anaconda!

:grr:

[mitchtv]

20. he burned me on a nickle bag of weed

scoundrel

[EFerrari]

22. Hugo Chavez has every nickel he ever made.

lol

[scarletwoman]

21. Chavez leaves the toilet seat up!!!

[roody]

96. That's it! I'm through with him!!

[EFerrari]

108. He's a big potty mouth!

[SixString]

27. He swiped everyone's civility.

[EFerrari]

30. No one has ever seen Hugo Chavez in a tie.

:eyes:

[Monk06]

38. Hugo Chavez broke up my marriage. She said, "You just weren't enough after Hugo"

[EFerrari]

41. Hugo Chavez is a third rate romance!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTT-Jmi1nOc

[Monk06]

48. She said, "Hugo Chávez tiene las bolas de un toro". I don't speak Spanish, what did she mean.??

[EFerrari]

55. She meant, "Hugo Chavez, call your mother!"

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Ke2JDfhSGu0/S1kskV2ZLmI/AAAAAAAAAGw/W1_hHMrlQHw/s320/CALL+YOUR+MOTHER+CHAR+WHITE.jpg

[Monk06]

80. Hugo Chavez' mother is Jewish ?????????

[EFerrari]

87. Who knew?

:shrug:

[Peace Patriot]

39. Hugo Chavez has an eery, mesmerizing effect on corporate reporters causing them to

spill their brains out of their left ear every time they write an article about him. The odd thing about this puzzling disorder is that it doesn't affect their right ears at all.

The leaders of the new Puke/Diebold Congress were discussing a ban on all images of Hugo Chavez throughout the media, as a health measure to stem this debilitating and out-of-control disease, until they realized that they like half-brained reporters. So they've decided instead to urge Wal-Mart and all of America's shopping malls to put ten foot high, inflatable Hugo Chavez's at every door and next to every Christmas tree, with a sign next to each inflatable that says, "Think about him," to see if they can produce half-brainedness in the entire U.S. population.

---------------

:P

[EFerrari]

43. Omg. Hugo Chavez is Kreskin!

:rofl:

:hi:

[cherokeeprogressive]

44. Hugo looks dashing in a uniform. Any uniform. n/t

[EFerrari]

47. Ashley Wilkes was cheating on Miz Melly with Hugo Chavez!

[cherokeeprogressive]

97. Frankly my dear...

Merry Christmas E!

Hey don't miss the total lunar eclipse starting Monday 1030 p.m! It'll be raining here :(

[EFerrari]

99. It'll be raining here, too, but maybe HUGO CHAVEZ will see it.

:)

[cherokeeprogressive]

101. Some people say he has X-ray vision...

I've even heard he's volunteered to be a scanner at the airport in Caracas...

[EFerrari]

104. Hugo Chavez 's mother's brother's lover's uncle's kid by marriage

has all the coffee concessions at the Caracas airport and it's all for sale to Iran, too.

Buenas. :)

[Bill McBlueState]

45. He ate all the bacon.

Hugo Chavez came wandering into my kitchen an hour after everyone else woke up, helped himself to all the bacon, and just carried it back to his room without saying 'good morning.'

The bastard.

[EFerrari]

50. Hugo Chavez ate the last cookie in the cookie jar.

[Gabi Hayes]

53. Then bit a hole in Lady Gaga's dress:

[EFerrari]

60. Hugo Chavez has a great dentist!

LOL

[Gabi Hayes]

66. you just ruined my night!>>>>

I'm getting a wisdom tooth out monday...no nitrous, either

[EFerrari]

70. Do not do that.

Serially!

:scared:

[devilgrrl]

49. Hugo Chavez will EAT YOUR CHILDREN!!!!!!!!

He EVIL!!!!!!

Bugga bugga bugga!!!!!

[xchrom]

52. Hugo was seen breast feeding his children at the Olive Garden

And he raises pit bulls on the side.

[EFerrari]

58. Omfg. I bet all those dogs smoked since BIRTH, too.

lol

[devilgrrl]

54. Hugo Chavez is behind 'Jersey Shore'

and snookie.

[EFerrari]

59. Hugo Chavez is behind reruns of Three's Company!

[devilgrrl]

56. I saw Hugo Chavez kissing Mrs. Santa Claus while Santa was spreading holiday cheer.

eom

[EFerrari]

61. Please allow Hugo Chavez to introduce himself

he's a man of wealth and taste!

[devilgrrl]

57. Hugo Chavez thinks people are poor because they're lazy and unemployment benefits promote Sloth.

:popcorn:

[EFerrari]

62. Hugo Chavez goes out in public disguised as a 3 toed sloth.

[Common Sense Party]

64. Hugo Chavez is an honest, democratically re-elected visionary leader

who cares about his people and about democracy and human rights.



















Wow, that's a stretch.

[EFerrari]

69. Hugo Chavez stole your cable!

:wow:

[Gabi Hayes]

81. Hugo Chavez got CSP kicked off the NED!

cause he's under....endowed!

[EFerrari]

88. Hugo Chavez will not show you no badges.

lol

[madinmaryland]

65. Un-reccing.

Waste of bandwidth.

[EFerrari]

67. Hugo Chavez unrecced this thread!

[Gabi Hayes]

71. relax, Francis....lighten up:

http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:3sjzKu5Btpl0OM:&t=1

[madinmaryland]

92. Nice post, taterguy!

:P

[Gabi Hayes]

95. don't get cute with me...

I used to live in Virginia



http://www.catchthesunrise.com/catchthesunrise/Pages/whiteys.html

ever been there?

[madinmaryland]

98. Thanks, taterguy! Southern VA I assume.

[taterguy]

170. I'm warning you. Don't go there.

Seriously.

[madinmaryland]

175. Southern VA or Eastern Tennessee is about the same thing, Francis.

[robinlynne]

68. love the title.

[JanMichael]

72. He killed my daddy AND stole his horse. nt.

[EFerrari]

75. Hugo Chavez fried my ham!

:grr:

[me b zola]

179. If you are a ham sandwich you can be indited!

--of which charges I have not a clue--yet you could be indicted! Denounce your ham sandwich ways! Or Hugo will get you! Or someone will, but never mind that...

[uppityperson]

73. Hugo Chavez luvs pit bulls

[EFerrari]

76. Hugo Chavez takes pit bulls to Pottery Barn

with coupons!

[uppityperson]

86. eating fried chicken coated in corn flakes

[EFerrari]

90. and wearing white socks!

[Gabi Hayes]

74. devil incarnate, complete with satanic minions:

[EFerrari]

77. Hugo Chaez has a CoverGirl complexion!

:rofl:

[ZombieHorde]

78. Hugo Chavez doesn't enjoy Dungeons & Dragons. nt

[EFerrari]

79. Hugo Chavez got lost playing Zork!

[ZombieHorde]

82. When I was little, my dad had Zork like games on cassette tape.

He had a cassette tape player hooked up to his computer. I have not thought about those games in a long time.

[EFerrari]

84. We had a PCJr and my sons learned the directions by playing Zork until

Hugo Chavez took that model off the market. :)

[ZombieHorde]

89. That mother fucker! He shuffled all of my Magic the Gathering decks together as well. nt

[suffragette]

83. He took the catnip from my kitty!

[EFerrari]

85. Hugo Chavez is the cat that stole the cream!

:)

[suffragette]

94. Meowrrr!

:hi:

[EFerrari]

93. Hugo Chavez said, when you awake you will remember everything

[Poll_Blind]

100. He's got a Maria Muldaur album that he keeps hidden away and plays when no-one's around.

Wait, no. Shit, that's me.

:blush:

PB

[EFerrari]

102. LOL! Hugo Chavez wrote La Macarena!

[proud2BlibKansan]

103. You are awesome

:applause:

[EFerrari]

105. Do I look like Hugo Chavez to you, lady?

lol

You all are awesome. :hi:

[Poll_Blind]

106. Hugo Chavez: No friend to our sacred institutions:

IN MEMORIAM

Chavez does not kill alone.
Look at the thugs who support him:

Help defend our flag. Stop Hugo Chavez!

PB

;)

[EFerrari]

107. ARGH! Hugo Chavez took my Chomsky away!

:grr:

[rabs]

109. Hugo Chavez

Nunca toma solo, excepto cuando esta con alguien !!

No importa a donde va. Alli esta !!

:hi:

[EFerrari]

111. De donde vienes y adonde vas, como te llamas y como estas?

De la cantina vengo, a la cantina voy

Hugo Chavez me llamo y borracho estoy!

:hi:

(A nonsense rime: where have you come from and where are you going / what is your name and how are you dong?)

[PufPuf23]

110. Hugo is threatening the Dutch Antilles an Aruba

and has made Natalee Holloway a sex slave. OMG!!!!!!!!

[EFerrari]

112. I saw him take my beer, man.

lol

[rabs]

114. Hugo Chavez went to Aruba

and when his plane took off to return to Caracas, he looked down and wistfully said

Arubaderchi ...

[Peace Patriot]

140. That joke is a crime against humanity! Invade Hugo Chavez! nt

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

113. Hugo Chavez is the leading cause of global warming. Even though global warming is a liberal lie. -nt

[eridani]

115. Hugo Chavez shot a man in Reno

Just to watch him die.

[NuclearDem]

116. Hugo Chavez shot the sheriff

And the deputy.

And your little dog too.

[EFerrari]

117. LOL

Hugo Chavez has the wedding bell blues. :)

[Kalun D]

118. Hugo Chavez

Plays chess

he beat the crap out of the bush boy cuz he thought he was playing checkers

and Chavez called the bush boy "diablo" said he could still smell him in the room, the gall of the man!!!

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

120. He's the love child of Fidel Castro and Margaret Thatcher.

[rug]

122. He just gave Venezuelan millionaires $70 billion tax break.

:grr:

[EFerrari]

129. Liar!

[JVS]

123. Hugo Chavez makes outrageous claims about the US trying to destabilize his country.

Oh, wait...

[EFerrari]

130. Hugo Chavez on a bicycle!

[me b zola]

124. Hugo Chavez is hovering in my airspace!

:hide:

Where does he go? Too. Also.

[tuckessee]

125. Chavez throws like a girl.

What's up with that softball? I thought Venezeula was a good baseball country?

[EFerrari]

126. I hear his split finger fast ball is slower than my granny.

:)

[malaise]

127. Love this thread

Viva Hugo!

[EFerrari]

131. Feels like DU again, doesn't it?

But then, that could just be Hugo Chavez. :shrug:

[malaise]

139. Bwaaaaaah hahahaha

Sure does :hi:

[Ichingcarpenter]

128. What a wonderful thread. my friend

If we only lived in a state of mind.

[EFerrari]

132. Hugo Chavez was a fool to say he didn't love me

just because I hurt his pride!

:)

[PufPuf23]

133. Hugo Chavez thinks Mt. Diablo should be named for Bush not Reagan

Hugo calls the pimple on his right ass cheek Mt Reagan.

[Scurrilous]

134. ...

:P

[EFerrari]

141. What was that, somebody fill me in , come on.

:)

[devilgrrl]

135. Hugo Chavez gives taxcuts to Billionaires!!!!

Oh wait...

[Odin2005]

136. I find it funny that people are bashing him for getting emergency powers for a NATURAL DISASTER.

[Nye Bevan]

138. Yes! We would have all loved Bush to do the same thing after Katrina! (nt)

[EFerrari]

144. You're right. Bush didn't. He just sent in mercs and privatized

the recovery.

He never wanted to get hands on with Katrina or he would be Hugo Chavez. :)

[Petrus Romanus]

146. It's a strange thread when DUers are attacking Bush for not being authoritarian enough. nt

[EFerrari]

150. That's just the Hugo Chavez.

:)

[Hello_Kitty]

137. Hugo Chavez forgot to put salt on my margarita glass. Fucking bastard!

[leftstreet]

142. CHAVEZ STOLE PUTIN'S AIRPLANE

Well, it KINDA looks like it's true

How did I miss this thread?
:-)

[EFerrari]

143. LOL! Not AGAIN!

:p

[Canuckistanian]

145. Hugo Chavez told 4chan that I abused animals

Now I have to have my mail sent to the bomb squad police.

[EFerrari]

152. Just wait until he tells them you deal with Bank of America.

:P

[Kurovski]

147. Hugo Chavez plotted to steal Ronald Reagan's corpse

and turn him into a May day float.

[Kurovski]

149. Hugo Chavez said DADT took so long because I chased too many sailors!

:cry: Mean fucker!!!

[EFerrari]

151. Hugo Chavez was just jealous!

:)

[Kurovski]

157. Thank you.

But I'll never shake the Hugo Chavez trauma.

[EFerrari]

159. There is a 12 Hugo Step Program

if you want to join the list. :party:

[Kurovski]

163. .

:cry: :cry: :cry:

Hugo Chavez says to me: "They don't want you, your teeth are weird."

[me b zola]

153. Hugo stole my Yugo!

ZOMG!

[stevedeshazer]

154. +1. Good one, E. n/t

[EFerrari]

155. Merry Christmas, my friend.

It's nice to see you here at DU. :hi:

[stevedeshazer]

168. Same to you!

The struggle continues....

:hi:

[flvegan]

156. He turned me into a newt!!

[taterguy]

158. A newt?

[Kurovski]

160. Hugo chavez said he voted for Dennis Kucinich.

But he really didn't!!!

[EFerrari]

161. Oh, come on.

This time, he turned you into a newt, hmmm?

[flvegan]

162. Chavez also killed Kenny!

[devilgrrl]

164. Hugo Chavez opposed the repeal of DADT

:popcorn:

[EFerrari]

165. Hugo Chavez thinks Julian Assange is a soap star.

[struggle4progress]

166. Of all the joints, in all the world, he bogarted mine!

[EFerrari]

169. Hugo Chavez keeps a thumb on the scales.

lol

[Kurovski]

167. Hugo Chavez thinks Chinese products are an excellent value.

Hugo Chavez thinks every child needs more lead this Christmas.

[DireStrike]

171. Hugo Chavez never uses his turn signal.

Well, sometimes he uses it when changing lanes on the freeway. But then he leaves it on for hundreds of miles.

[EFerrari]

172. Red zones? That was Hugo Chavez's idea.

[SecularMotion]

173. Hugo is a bad mother-(Shut your mouth)

[Kurovski]

180. Hugo Chavez forced y'all to stop using his last name.

[EFerrari]

174. This thread has nearly 2000 views. Skinner, I'm so sorry!

I hope Homeland Security doesn't come down on us like Hugo Chavez!

[me b zola]

176. Hugo puts polka dots on people

Polka-fucking-dots--ZOMG! Can you freaking imagine?! Polka-frreaking-dots!!!! RUN!!!!!!

[Brother Buzz]

177. Hugo Chavez edited....

the children's menu at Hooters®

[EFerrari]

178. Hugo was the pirate at Free Credit Report dot Com.

[piedmont]

181. Every time this thread gets bumped, Hugo Chavez kills a kitten.

oh noes!!!!!!!!!!

[EFerrari]

184. Kick

lol

[JCMach1]

182. He's leading a world-wide movement to confiscate your golf course

Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez has received extra attention recently with his rant against the sport of golf. "Golf is a bourgeois sport" said Chavez on Sunday after officials have moved ahead to close two of Venezuela’s top golf courses. His comments were criticized by a State Department spokesman and ridiculed by some in the press... http://ourlatinamerica.blogspot.com/2009/08/is-chavez-golf-rant-hole-in-one-or.html


At least our State Dept. seems to think so... :(

[Kurovski]

183. Hugo Chavez reveals the surprise endings to movies.

[Hell Hath No Fury]

185. Hugo Chavez ate my baby!

I think that's an old classic from w-a-a-a-y back. :D

[Hell Hath No Fury]

186. Hugo Chavez forced me to buy shitty, overpriced health insurance!

:D

[Hell Hath No Fury]

188. Hugo Chave killed a man -

and ate his liver with fava beans and a nice chianti. Ph-ph-ph-ph-ph-ph...

[fascisthunter]

189. lol...he's responsible for Global Warming Propaganda

he and Soros are conspiring to shut down all productivity around the globe!!!!

You know what's sad, there are people who actually believe shit like that.