By now, many of us have had the pleasure to read your latest tidbit of online wisdom/mindless word salad. I won’t bother repeating it, but it’s clear that you have telegraphed your true feelings to the world quite well.

For it is quite clear from what you wrote that you consider your current President not to be Joe Biden, the duly elected and sworn leader of the country in which you live—a man you refer to nothing except simply “Biden”—but rather the Russian leader Vladimir Putin, of whom you brag you gained his “respect” and who you so warmly and venerably refer to as “President Putin.”

This of course is a anti-democratic autocrat who has stifled dissent, attacked and interfered in our elections and institutions, invaded his neighbors and seized their lands, and most recently poisoned his chief political rival and then imprisoned him for the crime of surviving.

We get it. You view Vladimir Putin, and not Joe Biden, as your President. And if that’s your true feeling, that’s fine. Who am I to force you to feel otherwise?

But you know what that means, don’t you?

It means if it’s the Russian President who you consider your President, you’ve got to move there.

And for the record, at this point I’m more than fine with it. Yes, part of me yearns to see you summoned to court and spend the rest of your living days in some correctional facility under either federal, New York or Georgia jurisdiction.

But that will take time and frankly we’re all quite sick of you and just want you out of our hair.

Now, your new President Putin might see fit to put you up in a villa in Rostov-on-Don, like he did for Viktor Yanukovych. Or maybe he’ll stick you in a godforsaken one bedroom Khrushchyovka in frigid Norilsk. I suppose that’s just a risk you’ll have to take.

But I can see no more fitting ending to you legacy if you were to spend your last days confirming to the country and the world what we knew you were but what you so desperately tried to deny:

A Russian asset, useful idiot to Putin and traitor to the United States of America.

Don't get me wrong; he's far from the first person the Trumpists have targeted with malicious lies, disinformation, and overt threats. And while their attacks against Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden were absolutely repulsive, because they were overt political figures, at least I was more or less prepared for it.

But Dr. Fauci is an apolitical lifelong civil servant. He was called up to the task force by the Trump administration, and for a while was something of a unicorn: a person working with the Trump White House who was actually highly qualified and competent for the job that was assigned to him.

And yet now the Trumpist cult seeks to tear him down, destroy his reputation and utterly vilify him. They want to push an absurd and false narrative that he somehow conspired with the Chinese government to create Covid-19. I don't know how many right wing blue checks on social media have literally called for him to be imprisoned for imaginary offenses.

And what is the reason for all of this? It's simple.

Jealousy.

Petty jealousy and nothing more.

In 2020, when the virus began to rage and Donald Trump stood at the podium and rattled off the most ridiculous nonsense, lies and dangerous misinformation, most Americans were desperate for a voice of calm reason and sanity. And thankfully, Dr. Fauci provided that for Americans. And so, he became quite a popular figure to the public, across the board, regardless of one's political affiliation. Because if you couldn't trust anyone else, at least you could trust Dr. Fauci.

Now, if Trump was politically savvy, he could have attempted to "own" Dr. Fauci. He could have claimed all the credit for bringing this extremely popular figure on board and thus tried to hone in on the goodwill that surrounded him. Perhaps that might have been a little bit disingenuous, but at least it would been a good move politically.

But Trump isn't smart or saavy; he's a repulsive, malignantly narcissistic creature who is bitter and resentful towards others getting the attention he insist is due to him. He hated that people trusted Dr. Fauci and didn't trust him. He hated that Dr. Fauci provided an air of calm whereas all he created was confusion and chaos.

And so, he set out to destroy him. And so did all his syncophantic Death Eater followers, because where they went one, they went all.

All of this was tragic because throughout all of this Dr. Fauci has remained the consummate professional. He has never made anything about politics. Hell, he really hasn't publicly and overtly criticized Trump, instead focusing on the long game of solving this virus.

And he seems like a genuinely decent and good guy to boot. Which is why--much like President Biden for the same reasons--most ordinary, regular-minded Americans continue to approve of what he's doing.

But the Trumpists have gone insane with jealousy over him and are hellbent in trying to destroy his reputation. Double so now that Trump is out of office and Biden is in, and now Fauci is Biden's man. Their most recent efforts center around emails (what else?) to and from from Dr. Fauci obtained from a FOIA request. There's nothing really shocking there--most notable was a shift in his approach to masks very early on in the pandemic but nothing that we didn't already know.

But they're already creating false narratives and conspiracy theories out of them. I've even seen some blatantly fabricated false emails floating around.

And it's just so depressing and disheartening to go after a decent, highly intelligent and qualified guy all because they are insanely jealous and bitter that their guy was an unmitigated disaster.

It tears me up for whatever reason. I just feel so bad for the guy. He doesn't deserve this at all.

News that former President Donald Trump's blog--entitled "From the Desk of Donald J. Trump" has been shuttered due to a lack of public interest and engagement has left his handlers racing to distract the former President from his most recent failure.

And the leading solution to bring Trump out of his post-blog doldrums?

A procession of perpetually ongoing boat parades, to be carried out 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, in front of whichever residence Trump is currently calling home at the given moment.

Sources close to Trump say that the multi-vessel cavalcade--replete with boats flying at least a dozen Trump flags a piece and bikini clad women wearing Make American Great Again hats dancing on their bow--will parade itself in an endless loop in front of Trump's residence, whether or not the former President was actually watching.

"Basically, it's the intent that he might be watching at any given moment more so than his physical presence actually be required for the parades to take place," one individual stated. "We'll just assume he's always there as the boats pass on by."

While Mar-a-Lago--Trump's large Florida estate located along the Intercoastal Waterway in Palm Beach--naturally lends itself to such events, other Trump residences that are not located in close proximity to any major bodies of water--such as his Bedminster Golf Club in New Jersey--pose some greater logistical challenges.

Trump's staff was quick to come up with an alternative option.

"We will still have a boat parade when Donald's in Bedminster, except that the boats in that case will be pulled by trucks," a staffer said. "Naturally, the trucks themselves will also be flying Trump flags and have women in bikinis, so really it would be a boat parade and a truck parade all in one. The best of both worlds, really."

"For Mar-a-Lago, we actually considered the converse, where the boats would be pulling trucks," the staffer added. "However, we were forced to abandon that idea when we realized that the trucks would ultimately sink to the bottom of the water."

That was not the only idea that Trump's staffers ultimately decided against.

"We briefly thought about having goats with Trump flags mounted to them constantly roaming the Bedminister grounds," the Trump staffer said. "So, yes, that's right. Goat Parades. However, the goats we ordered for this project turned out to be...well, let's just say, not so cooperative."

"Basically, it was a massive, unruly goat orgy," he noted. "It detracted from the true MAGA spirit that we thought would best delight Donald's whims and fancies. And isn't that what should really matter?"

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