Avoiding MAGA relatives over Thanksgiving (asking for advice)

[UniqueUserName]

25. Why are you more concerned about MAGA having a pleasant Thanksgiving than the 66,000 people wrongfully interned?

I'm linking to a Youtuber, Parkrose Permaculture. I'm linking specifically to the 5:00 minute mark where she clearly states my position on this matter:

?si=8NZjNpNlg2AAELHy&t=297

(Hopefully that link will start at the proper timestamp)

To be clear, I'm not going to their house. I am not going out of my way to confront them. But I'm not running away either. If they come and ask me why I don't socialize with them, I will tell them. It is no difficulty for me to be alone. I am an introvert. Even as an introvert, it will be slightly unpleasant; As there will be 6 additional people running around family property and riding ATVs.

I see that you are in NC. I assume you are familiar with the teachings of the majority of Southern Christians with the emphasis on "unmerited favor". At least in AL, the standard message is, "I'm not perfect; just saved. . ." I'm not interested in debating religion. I'm merely stating how this one particular aspect of the faith as it plays out in the South is manipulatable by political power. It dovetails perfectly with white privilege. All these relatives are of this type of Christian.

My Latino partner is Catholic. He is a perfectly lovely human. He is working a contract in Albuquerque. There are perfectly lovely Christians.

I understand human relationships are complex. My partner's best friends are three white women who supported him as his partner of 25 years was dying of cancer. His best friend, who is lovely, was really his husband's best friend. Even as his husband was dying, she guided his partner into getting his affairs in order properly. She took ownership of that process and helped his dying husband pen a proper will and the like. My partner was too busy caring for his husband to think of such things.

When my partner's husband died (and while he was dying), his sister-in-law was trying to secure her brother's assets for herself. His sister-in-law at the reading of the will in the probate judge's office said to the probate judge, "He [her brother] only married him [my partner] so that he [my partner] could get his green card." She said that to the probate judge.

Fortunately, the judge knew everyone and said to my partner's best friend later, "I knew him. You couldn't make him do anything he didn't want to. . ."
(My partner is fine and is now a US citizen. I found out what the judge said one time when I was having a one-on-one with my partner's best friend.)

Yet when we were dining out with these friends one time, one of them (not the best friend), was making veiled reference to undesirable aspects of Hispanic immigrants. I saw her checking out my partner's reaction. He didn't respond. I didn't ask him. I don't think his best friend condones what the other friend said. But no one called anyone out. I had only been seeing my partner for a couple of months at this point. We've been together for 2 years.

This is part of Southern culture. It might be part of human culture. I don't know. I've not been many other places. When my partner took the contract in Albuquerque, he said that he was looking forward to interacting with people more familiar with his home culture. I think he has. When he left, when I would express my frustration at the MAGAs in my family, he was much more conciliatory toward them. Lately he has been saying things more like, "They've made their choices. . ."

To me, you sound like my progressive sisters. They are always trying to give room to the MAGAs to be bigger people. I am saying there is no reason for MAGA to be bigger people if we acquiesce to all of their unreasonable demands.

Southerners aren't worse than other people. We're all just people with propensities for altruism or evil. At least around here, Ashville has a reputation as being a blue dot in a sea of red. But I can speak of Southern culture in general having experienced it for 57 years. There is a tendency to circle the wagons to defend a fellow Southerner regardless of how egregious their actions.

I appreciate the other posters who have shown concern for my mental well-being. As hlthe2b has suggested, I have a prescription for beta blockers. I'll be fine.