Reply #141: Middle America can't relate to gays and lesbians [View All]

[Warren DeMontague]

clearly, they should stay in the closet and avoid upsetting anyone. Certainly "We" should not be affiliated with such types in public.

Much of Middle America can't relate to Jews, and most of middle America can't relate to atheists, agnostics, or other unbelievers. They better shut the hell up about their rejection of Jesus, if they get near a camera at a rally. In fact, we better leave that whole "separation of church and state" thing out of our party's agenda, because it might alienate Middle America.

Minorities? much of Middle America has a problem with them, unless they're sports stars or something. Better keep those rallies nice and white.

Obviously, the massive victory Bush won in last year's election was a mandate for "values", and as such, we really need to stop talking about stuff like reproductive choice, which has a tendency to alienate "middle America".

But, as long as we're talking about dress codes, I'm curious: Is it JUST tie-dyes that should be "banned" in Crawford? Or are there other fashion statements or appearance issues that "We" should be sure to do away with?

What about people with Tatoos?
What about people with mohawks?
People with Long Hair? Short Hair? Blue hair? Green Hair? Red Hair? No Hair?
What about people with facial hair? ZZ Top beards? Goatees? Handlebar Moustaches? (After all, they might be -gasp!- accused of dragging out "tired old '60s cliches"- 1860s, that is.) 5 o'clock shadow? Bad bowl haircuts? (I would say mullets, but I suspect the mullet crowd is on the other side)
People with pets?
Midgets?
People wearing t-shirts for bands like The Sex Pistols?
People wearing t-shirts for bands like Huey Lewis and The News?
People on Stilts?
How about people in Leisure Suits?
People with giant afros?
People with Pictures of Bill Clinton on their shirts?
People with Pictures of George Clinton on their shirts?
What about celebrity lookalikes?
Actual Celebrities?
Jugglers? No, absolutely, juggling in any form should be banned in crawford.