Reply #8: I have such mixed feelings on this topic and I am really trying to sort [View All]

[Bouncy Ball]

them out. Good post, by the way.

As for Reggie White and others like them, if they were hateful in their life and now they have died, well then....they are dead. There really isn't any reason for me to piss on their grave--they are gone, after all. I won't sit around crying (I didn't when Reagan died) but I won't piss on their grave either. What's the point?

But to the bigger point--hate. I am struggling with this. I used to say that I didn't HATE bush, I HATE what he has done, I hate his actions, his words, his philosophies and that was true. But lately, for ever more obvious reasons, I have come to say I hate the man, too. Maybe that's true, maybe that's not, but I think I need to get back to hating his ACTIONS rather than him. Heck I focused better on his actions back then anyway. It wasn't blurred up with hating HIM.

On the other hand, I feel like I've bitten my tongue and been a good little girl my whole life. You know, don't rock the boat, don't make waves, go along to get along, etc etc blah blah blah. And at this point in my life, both personally and in relation to what's going on in the world, I am tired of that. Done with it.

What I have to do now is reconcile speaking up, being heard, working hard for change and at the same time NOT letting anger and hatred consume me in the process.

I am a spiritual person and I have been asking my Higher Power to help me with this.

It's something I think we need to talk about here. And I think sometimes DU is the ONLY place some of us have for venting and letting it all out. I think the emotional aftershocks of Black Tuesday are far deeper and more severe than most people think and we are still struggling through that. I know I have days where I just want to scream "FUCK YOU" at every person driving a car with a bush bumper sticker and flip them off. But I know that won't help. And oh my God, when I think of all the Iraqis and American service members living through that HELL we started over there, I just want to scream and cry and throw things. But that won't help, will it?

During the primary season, I was working hard for Dean. I noticed every time I got out there and DID something, whether it was writing letters to undecided Democratic voters in other states, or handing out Dean literature at an event, or going to a meetup and speaking, I felt all that negativity dissipate. I think action is the key. That is my #1 priority for the new year, find out what form MY action will be taking so that I won't sit around stewing in these juices.

Thanks, Bertha.