Most Pathetic Grammys [View All]

[NightTrain]

I don't think anyone at DU would claim that the Grammys truly represent what is the best in music. But the following are what I'd call the Grammy's most pathetic moments:


1. ELVIS PRESLEY

Ths King won three Grammys--in 1967, 1972, and 1974--for Best Gospel Album. And that's it!


2. BEST RHYTHM AND BLUES PERFORMANCE, 1958

The Champs, "Tequila"

Not only were the Champs an all-white group, but 1958 was the year in which Jerry Butler and the Impressions waxed the first true soul record, "For Your Precious Love," Chuck Berry created "Johnny B. Goode," and Lloyd Price rocked up the New Orleans blues chestnut, "Stagger Lee." The Grammys were off to a sad start, and they only got worse....


3. BEST ROCK AND ROLL RECORDING, 1962 and 1963

1962: Bent Fabric, "Alley Cat"
1963: Nino Tempo & April Stevens, "Deep Purple"

Two records that really make ya wanna shake yer ass to the beat, huh?


4. RECORD OF THE YEAR, 1964

Stan Getz & Astrud Gilberto, "The Girl From Ipanema"

Well, yeah. Who really gave a shit about Motown or the Beatles?


5. BEST ROCK AND ROLL RECORDING, 1964

Petula Clark, "Downtown"

See comments under #4.


6. BEST ROCK AND ROLL RECORDING, 1966

The New Vaudeville Band, "Winchester Cathedral"

Among the real rock and roll records of 1966: "Good Lovin'," "Devil With A Blue Dress On," "Day Tripper," "19th Nervous Breakdown," "Psychotic Reaction," and "96 Tears," to name but a few.

Thankfully, 1966 was the last time that the Grammys did this category. Speaking of which....


7. BEST ROCK AND ROLL RECORDING, 1979

After a 13-year hiatus, they brought back the Best Rock and Roll Grammy in 1979, only to give it to Bob Dylan for his gospel recording of "Gotta Serve Somebody."

Other Grammys from '79: Best Rock Vocal Performance by a Duo or a Group, the Eagles; Best Rock Instrumental Performance, Wings.


8. SONG OF THE YEAR, 1982

"Always On My Mind"

Elvis did the original version of that song in 1971. Glad to see the Grammy judges know their history!


9. BEST HARD/ROCK METAL PERFORMANCE, 1988

Jethro Tull

Excuse me, but Jethro Tull never played metal, and their rock was never what I'd call hard. (It featured a flute, for crying out loud!)


10. BEST NEW ARTIST, 1989

Milli Vanilli

And we all know what happened to them!


11. BEST POP VOCAL PERFORMANCE, 1991

Michael Bolton, "When A Man Loves A Woman"

I have just three words: PERCY FUCKING SLEDGE!!!