Reply #12: THIS. To all who think rape allegations are made easily... THIS. [View All]

[moriah]

I agree that every person who goes before the court system should get a fair trial. DNA evidence has helped with that.

But deciding whether or not to come forward and report being raped is one of the most difficult decisions any victim makes. I've been the friend that more than one victim of sexual abuse has come to as the first person they told. One chose to report and cooperate, but had significant personal reasons for doing so -- she wanted to protect her little sister. The outcome still devastated everyone. And while she personally didn't have her name in the papers, coming forward at all meant more people had to know about something she would have rather forgotten.

Testifying can be freeing for many, but whether they decide they want to actually go through the process to prosecute and assist in the prosecution is usually a decision made well before going to the police. For him, being an officer meant he was much closer to them than most. But if you force a person to prosecute you are again taking choice away from them.... when the entire reason that rape is wrong is that it is a force versus choice issue. It is about power dynamics. And for the person healing from having one choice taken away from them, they *need* their right to make their own choices respected.

Because as this officer knows, the process is NOT easy. Why would anyone subject themselves to the trauma if they weren't telling the truth about what happened to them? I'll never understand it.