I've had enough! I'm running for Governor!

[Big Kahuna]

heh.. not really... but if I were, this would be my platform:

- Bring the state sales tax down to a reasonable level, like 5%, and stop taxing groceries and clothing. Even my native state popularly known as "Tax-a-chusetts" only charges 5.5% sales tax, and does not tax food or clothing. It is a regressive tax, it hurts the poor, and it's evil!

- Provide decent housing assistance for the elderly. I am absolutely appauled at the poverty and squalor that I see elderly folk living in every day. The "faith-based" agencies are obviously not doing the trick.

- Eliminate all Toll roads in this state. Sorry to sound new-agey.. but the tolls are a serious blockage of energy in and out of this state. Oklahoma's economy is constipated. It needs an enema.

- Repeal the stupid beer laws! I haven't had a decent beer since I moved to this state!

- Repeal the stupid seatbelt law!

We are all starting to feel the effects of the Bush Administration's "Free Chicken and Beer" tax policies... so how do we pay for all this?

I propose a "Venezuela-like" State takeover of Oklahoma's oil feilds and natural resources, to provide affordable energy to Oklahomans and OUR OWN NATION! (not the Chinese, the Japanese, etc.. who we currently sell our domestically produced oil to)

So who's with me? :)

[OKNancy]

1. I like most of your platform

The seatbelt laws are fine with me.

PS - I go to the liquor store for my beer.

[Big Kahuna]

2. Thanks...

but you don't realize the enormity of the Beer-Law problem. Many types of beer get "skunked" if not refrigerated, and are not available in Oklahoma due to the puritanical, fascist, anti-beer taliban that is in power! It's just freakin' unamerican!

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -Benjamin Franklin

[RoyGBiv]

5. All the liquor laws ...

The liquor/beer regulations in this state form a book. They all need to be dumped and rewritten, with an eye to simplicity and sane enforcement.

Some of my "favorite" tidbits:

These are paraphrases but get at the flavor.

* The street facing door of a package store (liquor store) may not be kept open any longer than it takes a normal individual to enter or exit the building. This is considered an invitation to sell, which constitutes an infraction of the state liquor codes and may result a revokation of license to sell, fines, or both.

* No items in a package store may be refrigerated below room temperature either with mechanial refrigeration or ice or any other device intended to cool the items.

* Should breakage occur, the broken bottle must be retrieved and its tax stamp returned to the liquor wholesaler for cataloguing and reporting to ABLE.

* No item in a package store may be sold for less than 1 cent over the prevailing wholesale cost of the item.

I know people who have been shut down for infringing upon each of these rules. One was particularly absurd. A store in a small OK town had a front door with a tendency to stick as it was closing and not closed completely. The owner couldn't afford to get it fixed because it was a problem created by foundation shift. The door was only open a fraction of a inch, and the owner would close it as soon as he discovered it, but naturally he couldn't just stand at the door and do this constantly. Inevitably the ABLE inspector would come by, see the barely open door, and give him a citation. After three of these, he lost his license.

[YellowRubberDuckie]

6. My mom owns a liquor store in Kingfisher....

(If you go in, tell her you're Mel's friend. You might get a 10% discount. ;) ) It is absolutely stupid some of the laws they have. I didn't know the door law. My mom is always standing in it talking to people. I'd bettertell her.
Duckie

[RoyGBiv]

7. I'll be sure to say howdy ...

:-)

I don't make it out to Kingfisher, but if I do, I'll stop in. Having run one for a number of years, I've maintained this fascination with them, just seeing what's new and such.

The door thing is there, but it kinda depends on your ABLE agent as to how strict they are with it. Sometimes it's one of those things they use when they don't like you, and some of the agents are complete jerks. The one that did Seminole County several years back was the one who shut down the store for the door violation I mentioned.

We had a good one. The owner of my store screwed up his books once and bounced his license renewal check. This is instant revokation material. ABLE shows up at your store with a steel bar, chains, and a bolt lock, tells you to get out, and locks it up. He actually came with that stuff but wanted to know what happened first. Thankfully the owner wasn't there (he was a sometimes violent drunk and would have ensured we got closed down), and I explained once I figured it out myself. Thankfully again, I kept my own set of books because I knew the owner cooked the ones he filed with the IRS. Anyway, the ABLE guy gave us 24 hours to make good on the check, so I did, and everything was cool. Never even filed paperwork on it.

It was actually this guy who told me about the agent with the door fetish, and our agent thought the other guy was a moron who'd end up in a hole in a wheat field some day.

So, like I say, it depends on the agent you get.

[Big Kahuna]

8. Yeek

"ABLE shows up at your store with a steel bar, chains, and a bolt lock, tells you to get out, and locks it up."



Did they bring her along?

[RoyGBiv]

9. I think so ...

She's there in spirit I'm sure. :-)

[Joey Liberal]

3. You should run for something

If I were Governor, I'd keep doing what the current Governor is doing. I like the guy.

[Big Kahuna]

4. No offense to the current Governor.

I like the guy too.. just dreaming. :)