Lesbian Soldier Snagged in DOMA Red Tape

[William769]

A Michigan woman raising her child with her partner said the Army won't let her reenlist due to the military's own policies on child custody butting up against laws barring the federal government from recognizing same-sex couples.

Jessica Lohmeier, who served in the Army Reserves for two years, had a boy in 2009. She told WILX News that after raising James with her partner Lauren Russell for two years, she is ready to reenlist. However, the military requires that all parents with full custody of their children, like Lohmeier, show a marriage license as proof that a spouse will be able to take care of the child if the enlisted parent is assigned overseas. The policy states that the military may not "enlist an unmarried individual with a child under 18," according to the report.

But because of the federal Defense of Marriage Act, there is no form of recognition for their relationship, even if they were to wed or enter a domestic partnership or civil union in another state.

"Of course I am going to take care of him," Russell said. "That's my job as a second parent. We are a three-person family. I love her like my wife, and James as my son."

http://www.advocate.com/News/Daily_News/2011/08/04/Lesbian_Soldier_Snagged_in_DOMA_Red_Tape/

[MADem]

1. She needs to adjust her custody paperwork, that's the problem.

If she has "full custody" then her partner doesn't. She needs to go to court and get documentation of "shared custody." When you share custody--with anyone, it could be Grandma or Uncle Buck--you don't have these problems.

Married couples usually, unless someone has a mental or physical illness, share custody of a child born within the marriage. It is unusual for a married couple to have one partner with full custody and another with none, assuming they both are actual parents (and we can include adoption in this scenario) to the child.

In this case, the partner is NOT a "parent" in the entirely legal sense that she has not adopted the child and the biological mother retains FULL custody. That's where the problem lies. Love and affection have nothing to do with it.

If she can get paperwork documenting adoption/shared custody, that should solve the problem without even having to brush up against DOMA and the whole 'marriage license' thing. This article has been simplified to make a point, but it's not entirely accurate. Single parents leave their children with the 'baby-momma' or 'baby-daddy' -- or, more typically, Granny--all the time. There is no "rule" that you have to leave a kid with a spouse--particularly a spouse who has no custody rights.

All she needs to do is get some custody for that partner, of the shared/physical variety, and she's home free.

I predicted that this DOMA bullshit would cause problems with full integration into the Armed Forces (and got roundly criticized for suggesting it, too, IIRC).

That last line, about "legally marrying a man" to stay in the Army, is pure bullshit. Getting married does not automatically toss custody of a child to the husband.

She can do this the easy way, or she can do it the hard way. By putting the Army on the spot for something that is not their fault, but is a purely CONGRESSIONAL (DOMA) fuckup, she's doing it the hard way.

[FreeState]

3. Michigan doesn't allow second parent adoption so that's not a viable option

There have been some questions and movement on some case but it's not currently possible for a non-marrids couple to adopt jointly. (it not illegal but it doesn't happen currently).

http://www.hrc.org/issues/parenting/adoptions/8464.htm



Permits a same-sex couple to jointly petition to adopt? Possibly.
A Michigan appellate court has ruled that Michigan law only allows couples married to each other to petition jointly to adopt. (In re Adams, 473 N.W.2d 712 (Mich. Ct. App. 1991)).

However, another, more recent case, suggests there can be different outcomes. In Hansen v. McClellan, a biological mother terminated her parenting rights so that she and her partner could jointly petition to adopt her children. A court granted the adoption.  After the dissolution of the couple’s relationship, the mother attacked the grant of adoption, arguing that the court lacked the power to grant an adoption to an unmarried couple. The Court of Appeals held that the circuit court had the subject matter jurisdiction to hear the initial adoption proceeding.  Accordingly, the issue of whether it was correct to grant a joint adoption to an unmarried couple could only have been attacked on direct appeal, which the mother did not do. Therefore, the mother was unable to collaterally attack the grant of adoption. This does not necessarily mean that the statute allows joint adoptions by same-sex couples.However, it does show that at least one Michigan court has permitted this.  (Hansen v. McClellan, No. 269618, 2006 WL 3524059 (Mich. Ct. App. December 07, 2006))

In 2004, the state Attorney General issued an opinion stating that same-sex couples who are married from other jurisdictions are not legally authorized to adopt children in Michigan as a couple, but that one member of a same-sex couple could adopt a child in Michigan as a single person.
2004 Mich. Op. Att'y Gen. 7160

Permits a same-sex partner to petition to adopt partner’s child or child of the relationship? No explicit prohibition.
No explicit prohibition, however one judge has acted to block such adoptions. On June 4, 2002, Archie Brown, the chief judge of Washtenaw County, ordered all county judges to stop granting second-parent adoptions to unmarried parents because the practice violated state law. Brown then transferred all pending second-parent adoption cases to himself to ensure that his directive be enforced. The Michigan American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) filed a motion challenging his authority to transfer the cases. Brown promptly rejected the motion. It appears that no petitions for second-parent adoptions have been filed since this time.

[FreeState]

2. But it's a states right! How could this be???

/sarcasm

[readmoreoften]

4. Doesn't Obama still think our lives should be confusingly ripped apart by states?

Or has he "evolved"? Sure is taking as long as an evolutionary cycle.