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FirstLight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 01:11 PM
Original message
What's in a name...?
I have a strange request for readings, numerology, etc on name changes...

Since the ex is incarcerated, I decided to change my name and the names of the little ones. My oldest is 18 and it wouldn't fly with him anyway...

So here's the deal, I haven't filed the papers (though I have had them typed up for years) because there is a conflict between my choice of name and my family's idea of what's right. My mom says my dad will be insulted if I don;t change our names back to my maiden name (marsh) and it would create some disconnect between the siblings because they would have different last names. (my oldest is a Marsh)
I think it is too obvious and if my ex ever wants to come looking for us, he knows that name...
Besides, my son is the ONE Marsh-male who could carry on the name, so it is kinda cool that way. otherwise the name would have died off with my sister and I...

I personally want to take on my Maternal Grandmother's maiden name...why? because it is associated with my favorite grandma and her maiden name goes back all the way to the cherokee nation. SHE was the inspiration to leave the abusive marriage, it was HER spirit that showed me the way free...but my family won't get that. Let's just say i am doing it because my ex would NEVER be able to find us.

I don't want to confuse my kids or hurt my family, but time is ticking and the asshole is going to be released and we need to make sure this is DONE

so I wonder if the numerology or name means anything in this way?
Marsh vs. Terrell

any hits?
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Fire Walk With Me Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 01:26 PM
Response to Original message
1. You are deciding upon your energy and the paths it travels.
Listen to your heart, pray your Guides, and sleep on it.
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Tumbulu Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 01:34 PM
Response to Original message
2. Just sensibly- not very psychic here- maternal grandmother's
name seems much better. You are called to it, she is protecting you- is Terrell a Cherokee name?
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FirstLight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 01:40 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. not exactly...
When I looked up our lineage, it seemed like an anglo name that may have been taken on to hide from persecution...

my great great grandfather is listed on the Dawes rolls in OK after the trail of tears... and i believe his grandfather was from georgia cherokee...

turns out, either ironically or not, that i AM the seventh generation...and yes, i think that is significant as well...
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FirstLight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 01:37 PM
Response to Original message
3. here's what i found so far
marsh = 5 - Destiny Number 5

With a Destiny Number of 5 you must represent freedom to find fulfillment. To live up to your destiny you must work to embrace change and not fear it or cling to the familiar in your life. It doesn't mean rushing blindly into something new, however keeping yourself open to change and taking on new opportunities, challenges and adventures


terrell = 9 - Destiny Number 9

With a Destiny number of 9 you are meant to bring charity, beauty, art, romance and perfection into the world. By living a life filled with generosity, a kindness of spirit, compassion, forgiveness and understanding you will be rewarded with ultimate happiness and a wealth of gifts from life. You should live your life with the goal of making even the most ordinary things in life lovely and full of beauty.

~~~~~

Feels like MY soul has evolved into a new path and destiny...and the kids could be a big part of that, too... hmmmm
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I Have A Dream Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 01:43 PM
Response to Original message
5. I made up my own last name and legally changed my name to it.
Edited on Mon Dec-06-10 01:44 PM by I Have A Dream
I took a chance of upsetting many people, but I had to do it, and I have never regretted it or apologized for it. It was very empowering to choose my own last name. I know that you probably don't want to hurt your father, but such things can only count for so much. This is too important to not do what your heart tells you to do; you'll be living with this name for a long time. (I decided when I changed my name that I was never changing it again; this would be my name for the rest of my life. My husband and I have different last names.)

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FirstLight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 01:49 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. cool!
Well, part of this is also to stop the feeling like I have to 'hide' my accomplishments or webwork, etc...I worry that he will be able to track me down by a byline on some obscure article...it has been hard to feel like i am dual people.
I am not that girl anymore, and not the battered housewife either...

but i could surely feel more empowered stepping into my heritage and my grandmother's strength!

;) :hug: thanks
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MorningGlow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-06-10 06:50 PM
Response to Original message
7. I like Dream's idea of making up your own last name
A friend of mine did that as well, after she divorced for the third time and didn't want any of her old exes' names--and also no longer felt like she was the person she had been when she used her maiden name.

On a practical level, "Marsh" is fairly generic, but if you're in the same geographical area, then yeah, your ex might be able to find you pretty easily.

You seem to really be drawn to your grandmother's name (and that makes total sense). If you really want to use it, then you'll have to convince your father to get over it. It's your name, after all.

So you could go any one of the three ways. I also agree with FWWM--listen to your guides on this. :hug:
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hermetic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-07-10 06:40 AM
Response to Original message
8. I am another
I selected my own last name when I got divorced some 30 years ago and have never regretted it. My parents were not happy about it, but they got over it. It IS a very empowering thing to do. Best of luck and :pals:
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FirstLight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-07-10 11:28 AM
Response to Original message
9. Interesting side-note
Today would be our anniversary, 9 years...wow, how much life can change in a decade or so!
I think about cellular memory and how tyhe holidays have been difficult because this was the time of our ultimate crumbling and demise, but i actually forgot about the date/anniversary thing until this morning.

I think it's propitious though, gotta get this done and taken care of...before a new year starts...
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BanzaiBonnie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-07-10 01:00 PM
Response to Original message
10. Do what your heart tells you
We hope your parents would understand your need for safety rather than keeping a name that might put you in danger.
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FirstLight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-07-10 01:47 PM
Response to Reply #10
11. Today is the day, my friend
I sent you a msg...but i want to share somthing here too...

I realized the anniversary was today, and just got the kids off to school struggling to be cool and still get the job done. I made sure i took the time to get out and hug them before they ran inside this morning, though....so I was feeling pretty reflective as i stopped at the po box.

Inside was a notice, somethung had arrived for me and they did not have the name on record... you guessed it - Terrell

I had to go to the front desk and *claim my name*

i walked outside and wept and realized it was more symbolic than ever.
I'm reprinting the forms right now and filing them TODAY
how symbolic is the date?
I will be my new self by New Years - which also happens to be my bday

even when I feel like I am without direction, I can see that I ALWAYS have guidance... thank the angels!
:loveya:
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MorningGlow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-07-10 02:53 PM
Response to Reply #11
12. Wow, ain't that a message
Guess your guides were going to be quite clear on which name you should pick! Nice! :applause: :hug:
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FirstLight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-08-10 01:06 PM
Response to Reply #12
13. final postscript...
so it took me two hours to do the papers at the courthouse, and i was late picking Devin up from school. (laney had a playdate so we called our time 'our date')

for the whole time i was married to joe - i never had a wedding ring, he never thought it was important...
Devin had gone to the Holiday Store at his school and got presents for the family yesterday
he got in the car and couldn't wait to give me my present

a ring


(he did not know about the wedding ring thing)

closure? Symbolic much?
On my anniversary, my child completes the circle of LOVE...
wow, just wow
i am so very blessed :)
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