How tiring is it to homeschool youngish children?

[wildeyed]

I am considering homeschooling for my 4 and 6 year old. My 6 year old went to public school last year and loved it, but also began working 2-3 grade levels above her peers. Sounds like a great problem to have, and it is better than many others I can think of, but she is still out of step with her peers and the system doesn't seem to offer much for kids at her level of giftedness. I have her wait listed at a charter school which is appropriate for her level of development, but the wait list is long and competition to attend fierce. So I have it in my head that homeschooling is my back up if the public school can't meet her needs.

My son may or may not be as bright as my daughter, but regardless, he is a high energy, kinesthetic learner with no instinct to please authority figures. I was much like him as a child according to my own mother. I *hated* school, did poorly at it, got into drugs and nearly dropped out. Once I was out in the real world, I was successful and much happier, so I don't think I was as deficient as they tried to label me in school. Just different. I would prefer my son not experience the same type of pain, so I have homeschooling on the back burner for him too.

I have been "practice" homeschooling over the summer to see what it is like. I do a math curriculum with my daughter for an hour every day or so and we read and journal as well. I have not been pushing her, it is summer and she is six, but we have been doing some serious learning regardless.

I have found some support and guidance from a local homeschooling yahoo list as well, although I haven't done any events with them yet.

I find being home with the kids all day and trying to teach the older (I work with my son, too, but he is younger and needs a less academic approach) both deeply satisfying and intensely exhausting. My daughter seems to enjoy the attention I give her and we are closer this summer than we were over the school year which is great. But it is tiring!

Is this normal or am I doing it wrong? Are there tricks to doing this without completely burning out?

[mzteris]

1. Relax.

At this age - they should be PLAYING. Playing is work and learning and all vice versa.

An hour a day curriculum for a 6 yo?? oh dear.

OTOH - if she WANTS TO DO IT - go for it!!!!!

But if she doesn't - well, that's a lot of time on one subject for one so young - even one so gifted.

What curriculum might I ask?

Sometimes you can accomplish the same "learning experience" through play that you do through a worksheet, etc.

Having two - of disparate ability, style, energy - yeah - it takes a bit more planning/practice - but again - if it's "play learning" - it's a bit easier to manage.

If you're serious about hs'ing - and your older is gifted there are groups for hs'ing gifted kids.

There are many different styles of learning, teaching, parenting, etc.

And what works for one, may not work for the other. The key is flexibility.

[wildeyed]

2. She wants to do it.

In fact, we have conversations along the lines of, Me: Put your math away and get your climbing shoes, we are going to the rock gym NOW! Her: Awwww mom, do I have to? It was scary how much math she did the first week we started. She had never had much math instruction before and she just inhaled the knowledge. She work on it for, no lie, 2+ hours a day for 7 days straight. Kinda scary.

I used to be completely anti-academic study for kids under 7 and sent/send both children to a non-academic, experiential preschool. I see the irony in the fact that I gave birth to one of the most academically oriented kids to walk the planet. At four she was asking about college already :crazy:

Now I believe that it is ok to do academics with younger kids if they are interested. In fact, I feel like my new willingness to engage my children academically has improved their behavior somewhat. They seem calmer.

For math curriculum, I am using a variety of tools. We use an online tutorial at ALEKS.com. It is not computer gamish at all, but a fairly sophisticated tutorial program. I believe it was developed as a tool for remediation originally, but works well for my purposes, too.

We also do math card games from the Right Start series. Because I am enriching only right now and my daughter will return to school in the fall, I didn't want to invest in the full curriculum. It is pricey.

I use worksheets from Enchanted Learning occasionally if she is struggling with a concept. It bothers her less to be wrong on paper than to be wrong on the computer for whatever reason.

I bought a Singapore Math pre-K/K book for my son 'cause he asked for a math book, but he was disinterested in it almost immediately. I am certain that he will not be a worksheet boy when he gets older. Strictly hands-on with that one.

There is a statewide yahoo group for gifted HS'ers that I post on occasionally. They have been very helpful. I also see a co-op for secular homeschoolers in my area although I have not made contact with them.

I am not sure about HS'ing yet, just exploring the options and trying to figure out if it is suitable for my family. Because of my own issues with school, I have always been more open to the idea of HS'ing my own kids than the average person.

Now I know that my own kids are also out of step with norms, I want to have a back up for them. I am not the type of parent to go on an endless crusade to get my kid the programing they need from the public schools. If the school is unwilling to meet out needs, then I want to have a plan B. Private is too expensive.

I am actually kind of excited about the idea of HS, but also a little intimidated. Clearly :)

Thanks for the advice!

[mzteris]

3. follow her lead.

If she wants to, yeah.

But you're right, she *needs* other activities, too.

I caught my son when he was 9? - under the covers with a flashlight well after bedtime. AH HA! I threw back the covers. "What are you doing reading?!?"

He looked up guiltily. "But Mom, I just wanted to try and solve those Algebra equations you gave me." :rofl:


Aleks is a pretty common math course amongst hs'ers. Pretty popular with a lot of kids.

Singapore - worksheets - well - 4 is a bit young to be doing a lot of "writing". Though my 4 yo was eating up workbooks, too. He wanted to "do work, too" like his big brother.

Saxon is very repetitive and boring for most kids I've personally met. Though I've heard that some like it.

Don't. Do NOT buy "A CURRICULUM". No child is on "A" grade level. They're advanced here, slower there, on level in this, beyond in that - "A" grade level cannot meet those needs.

They're pricey. Time consuming. Boring. and don't really get the job done. (For most I've ever met/talked to - YMMV. :) )

I'd say - meet with the local secular group. Make some friends. Let your daughter make some friends. "Not going back to school" might be easier for her that way if she already has her hs friends in place.

Talk to them about the local system - how it handles kids like yours. Talk to them about what is AVAILABLE in your area in way of co-ops, extended classes, learning opportunities, etc.

Sounds like PS won't be able to keep up with her. Unless it's a very exceptional school. I've heard they do exist. Somewhere. ;)

She sounds like a prime candidate for HS. Your son is 4. Let him play. "Play school" while your daughter does 'school'.

There's nothing to say you can't have one in ps and one hs. That's my situation. The younger likes school. The older - wasn't for him.

Though he is considering - CONSIDERING mind you, going back - IF he can get into a particular highschool for alternative learning. Which is a huge step considering that he swore he'd NEVER EVER GO BACK even if you PAID HIM! PS did a number on him. :(

Good luck.

[wildeyed]

5. I went to an alternative HS for my last two years.

It was great. I had a complete academic turnaround, went from flunking out of remedial classes to A's and B's. Not that they gave grades, but when I applied to college later, they had to assigned grades to the written evals.


There are several public options for the highly gifted in my state.

One, my preferred option, is a charter school with a huge waiting list. They are an accelerated learning situation, but they also see the whole child, not just the IQ points. DD would be a completely average student there from what I have researched.

There is a gifted program in the public school aimed toward the exceptionally and profoundly gifted student. First, as intelligent as she is, DD is probably only borderline EG. I wouldn't want her to feel stupid or slow by putting her in an overly accelerated program. Second, they have a strong achievement criteria. Kids must be in the top 99th percentile in achievement or they can be cut from the program. A bit much pressure for a six year old, even a highly gifted one, don't you think?

Then there is the gifted program in her current school which is not accelerated enough. More for the bright, high achieving student.

We are like the three bears, programing that is too fast, not fast enough, but none that is just right!

She might be a good candidate for a grade skip. She is meticulous in her work, well coordinated, has good social skills and is on the older side for her current class anyway.

So I dunno, we have some options, but nothing really obvious is presenting itself, other than wait and see.

Homeschool would be fun, but time consuming. I was hoping to go back to work part time soon.

The four year old loves "play learning". We looked at an ant under the play microscope for ages today, then read a really good children's book about the concept of millions. I got it for DD, but DS was totally into it. :) So we have fun, too. Don't want to make it look like have their little noses to the grindstone all summer.

Thanks again for all the good info. I will make contact with the local HS group when I return from summer vacation. Good to have options, yanno?

[Kerrytravelers]

4. A charter school is public and therefore, while you may be on a wait list, you can not be denied

entry. It shouldn't be a competition to get in. If a charter is what you want, I'd look up the charter laws in your state to be sure you're being treated fairly.

I work as a teacher for a chartered homeschool.

[wildeyed]

6. There is an IQ requirement for entry.

You may have your child tested privately or participate in the yearly group test they provide for free. If your kid meets the entrance criteria, then they are entered into the lottery. My sense is that it is a fair system and they follow the rules.

The problem is that there are 100 applicants for 50 K spots (and I didn't know the school existed or that my daughter would qualify when she was in preschool). After K, they typically have only 1-3 openings per year and 10-30 applicants on the waiting list :(

My daughter is not *that* exceptional. Seems like it shouldn't be such a crap shoot to get her an appropriate education, but there it is.

[Kerrytravelers]

7. It seems your daughter passed the IQ part, however, I would still wonder how legal that is.

In California, charter schools are public and threrfore can not deny entry to anyone. However, children can be removed for various reasons, such as behavior and threats. But, a child needing remedial help can not be dismissed.

I would look in your surrounding area at the various charters, privates and other homeschooling groups and see what is the best fit for your daughter.

Good luck. This can be a trying time, but very rewarding when you find the right fit!


kt