So, maybe I'm wrong here?

[Misunderestimator]

What do you think?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=3502924&mesg_id=3503430

Isn't the phrase "Get 'er done" sexist? Sure seems so to me.

[lukasahero]

1. Sounds like

"get her f*cked" to me. Not too many other ways to interpret it, is there? If it was as inocuous as some claim it to be, they would have chosen differnt words. As either you or DA pointed out, this stuff is deliberately meant to be "hidden".

It's like shrub and company - they're so frickin' careful with their words so as to be able to dispute anyone who actually calls them out on something. "Well, that's not what we meant, you're just taking it that way." BS. They know damn well what they meant and we know it, too.

Good job on the thread.

[Misunderestimator]

2. Exactly what it sounds like to me...

It's one of the more misogynistic phrases I can think of that's in regular (and apparently accepted) use.

[Heddi]

6. It's all over the place

out here in Eastern Washington (hardly the paragon of liberal thinking), there's pickup trucks with "GET ER DONE" stickers, GER ER DONE hats, GET ER DONE T-shirts.


The amazing thing I've noticed is that I never see WOMEN wearing shirts that say "GET ER DONE"...just men.

Equally, I never see any women wearing shirts that say "NO FAT CHICKS"--only massively overweight and hardly attractive men whose bellies stick out past the bottom of their shirts, and who still wear size 38 pants (even though their pants are buttoned at their thighs because they won't fit anywhere north of that). But hey! It's a guy thing....

But hey! it's not MEANT to demean women, so it's okay. It's something the guys say...we shouldn't get our little heads so worked up over it, RIGHT???? :not:

[Heddi]

3. I can't stand Blue Collar Comedy

we had to (were FORCED to) watch that fucking garbage when we were at my Husband's Uncle's house during Christmas.

Now, don't get me wrong--Uncle is the greatest guy in the world...but his step-son is 16 years, 7feet and 400lbs of pure redneck trash. I love the kid, but he was seriously dropped on his head as a babe because he has MAJOR fucking issues. But that's another topic completely.

At any rate, the night before we were going back home, Jr. brings out the Redneck Tour DVD---ALL FOURHUNDRED HOURS OF IT.

I must've heard "Get'r'done" at LEAST a million fucking times, and it stopped being funny...oh hell...it was NEVER funny.

The comedians--I really don't see the appeal. I grew up in the south. I GREW UP AROUND PEOPLE LIKE THIS---THEY ARE NOT FUNNY. THEY ARE PATHETIC.

All the jokes were self-depreciating and of course it has the "you might be a redneck" guy--oh THOSE jokes never get funny, not even after FIFTEEEN YEARS OF THE SAME FUCKING JOKES :eyes:

Ugh.

I think the same thing --- get 'r done = get HER done

Like when my granddad goes out boating...he's going to "Put'r in the water" which is shorthand for 'put HER in the water'---"Her" being his boat.

"Put'r in the car"= put HER in the car (Her, being me as a child).

But but see...it's just HUMOUR....it means NOTHING...we're just OVERANALYZING it...really...it's boy's stuff...you still girls wouldn't understand anyways.

PS--I'd rather have my uterus scraped with a red hot poker than have to watch Blue Collar fucking Comedy Club ever again. It is a fate worse than death and I really do not respect anyone who can watch that tripe AND find it funny AND continue to watch it. It equates, to me, with people who find Toby Keith to be a deep and meaningful singer, or people who think Walmart has really good home decorating ideas....simple-minded....

[Misunderestimator]

4. LOL

Your entire post had me laughing! And I agree with every word!

I have two VERY redneck brothers who are unapologetic in their sexism and boorishness. No... that stuff just is not funny and never has been.

(I don't know HOW you sat through that much of it.)

[Heddi]

5. We had to

Uncle lives in a 2br trailer that is VERY small. I smoke, my husband doesn't, and so I would make a trip outside to smoke like EVERY ten minutes. My lungs may hate me, but you know, I was REALLY doing it for the benefit of the WHOLE body :)

Every time I'd go outside, My husband would just glare at me because I left him sitting there watching this crap.

Oh and the trailer is small and only has 1 couch. SO there was Me, Hubby, Uncle, Jr, and Wife sitting on ONE couch. Wife eventually got up and sat in the kitchen (I followed her and smoked :) ). Uncle got a plastic chair and sat on the side, but Jr didn't move, even though he had several feet on the other side of him. No, he just sat there and I was wedged in between Baby Huey and my husband.

Yeah. It was awful. PURE-LEY awful.

[OldLeftieLawyer]

7. I grew up among strong, smart women

They were uneducated, poor, hard-working, loving, loyal, and above all, clear-eyed about what mattered in this world.

They gave me so much. I was able to let each and every one of them know how much they mattered to me before they were gone from this earth. They showed me what women really are and how many strengths we have, if we are only confident enough to believe in those strengths and not lose sight of that marvelous fact by getting distracted by things that don't matter.

One woman, Rose, owned a beauty parlor. There were things there that scared me, long, dangling electrode-type things for permanents; shiny silver metal bullet-shaped hair dryers where ladies with their hair carefully rolled on plastic or brush rollers all tightly clipped together, sat and thumbed through "McCalls" or "Ladies Home Companion" or the much less racy "Cosmopolitan."

So much of my education came from listening to the ladies talk. They talked about their husbands, how they handled them, what life with them was like, and, sometimes, when I asked, how they met, what their courtships had been like, and what their weddings - I was hooked on weddings - were like.

They gave me everything. And all of these women worked full-time jobs, very often as the main breadwinner of the family. This was coal-mining country, anthracite, and, in the late fifties and early sixties, hard coal usage was declining, so the men were out of work and the women worked in the dress factories. My mother was one of those women.

I went with the ladies when their union, the ILGWU, sent them to strike for higher wages, better benefits, hours. I learned to sing "Look For The Union Label," and I found out what it was like to stand in the cold with women I loved, holding a sign I didn't quite understand, but knowing it mattered because they told me it did.

So, when I see a discussion like this about something as simple as a phrase I grew up hearing, I am reminded of the day Rose told me and my girlfriend Marcia about sex. There were times, you see, when Rose would disappear from the shop, when it was full of customers, and return maybe fifteen minutes later, smiling, flushed, and ready to get to those combouts.

Sometimes, she told us, young girls with all our lives before us, "you just gotta get him done."

Rose knew.

[all.of.me]

11. i love this story!

while i was reading this thread and the offending one in the lounge, i was thinking - women don't say or wear t-shirts that say, "get 'im done." why not? well, i guess women DO say it! why not?

[Finder]

13. Great story

and point taken.lol

[Name removed]

8. Deleted message

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[Name removed]

10. Deleted message

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[Finder]

12. I disagree

I think if you read the whole post you will see shaman is saying something different than you think. Feminists are individuals and will have different opinions. Vocalizing distrust comes across as paranoia and can be quite hurtful and impeding to the person put on watch.

I understand you and some of the others have had a few bad experiences on DU but comments such as "Classic. And amazing that you've lasted so long." are personal and do not exactly educate or make someone feel welcome.

I am not saying trust everyone explicitly--sometimes giving enough rope will get them hung.

[Misunderestimator]

14. LOL... Thanks.

But, I read all his posts... all 55 of them. The majority criticize women or feminism. I have no desire to "welcome" him into THIS forum or educate him, as it is obvious from his posts here that he is not interested in being educated. He needs to read the mission statement of this forum.

I agree with you that feminists are individuals. Individuals who handle people differently. I wouldn't presume to tell you how to interact with others. Why do you feel it necessary to educate me?

[Ripley]

16. Hyenas travel in packs.

Just saying. :hi:

[Misunderestimator]

17. ...

:spray: :hi:

[Finder]

18. Just disagreeing...

before the pile on.lol

[Misunderestimator]

19. Um.... are you projecting or something?

I suppose I should go search again to figure out what you mean by that... *yawn*

[Name removed]

21. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Bunny]

22. Perhaps you should refresh yourself on the Mission Statement

of this group:

The purpose of the DU Feminists Group is to provide a safe and non-threatening community where all those interested in discussing and trying to resolve the problems that are inherent to women in society can come and work together free from defending the basic premise that issues do exist which specifically affect and limit women, their rights and their potential.

Those who don't agree with this basic premise are not permitted to post in this group. It's true for all DU Groups, BTW, not just us whiny victimized women.

[Name removed]

27. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Bunny]

28. I was responding to poster #21, who was tombstoned.

Is that you? If so, why are you back? If not, why are you responding to me? My comments were not directed to you.

And furthermore, why do you care if it is just a "bitch session"? What exactly do you hope to accomplish here, other than what you've already shown?

[Ripley]

29. Men just can't stand not being the Leader. The Commander.

The Center of the Stage. The smart Daddy who knows best for us little girls. They just can't stand it that women have a special Group to discuss current day sexism and misogyny. So they disrupt any way they can. They point out this is a "bitch session" as if that is not allowed. They cloak themselves with "solutions" which oddly enough only are to come from within women's hearts and heads. See if we just stfu and ignore it, there wouldn't be any sexism.

I think the Administrator's owe us an explanation for how a tombstoned disruptor has regained admittance.

[Bunny]

31. Well, I alerted. Hopefully, that will solve this problem, once and

for all.

On edit - it did solve the problem. Thanks Mods! :thumbsup:

[Ripley]

39. No, he's bck again downstream blaming me for sexism.

I alerted, but do you have Skinner's email? I would like him to explain to me what the hell is going on!

[Bunny]

40. Maybe it's a glitch of some sort??? He's tombstoned yet again.

[e-mail] is the address for contacting the administrators.

[Ripley]

41. Thanks.

I sent him an email. I asked him why this person keeps getting un-banned and did the administrators not understand why he was alerted on. If he needs clarification can you help back me up with supporting posts you encountered that were disruptive and against the mission statement?

Thanks. :hi:

[Bunny]

42. Frankly, I don't remember the exact content of the most offensive

posts. But the Admins would have access to all deleted posts, so they can review them and ask further questions if needed, I guess.

[Finder]

43. Some posts deleted but not "tombstoned"

Tombstoned means banned, I assume.

[Ripley]

44. Yes, twice in the last two days that person's profile showed.

This:



As it does right now.

[Bunny]

45. He's been tombstoned, as in banned. Check the profile.

[Finder]

46. I did, but no tombstone...

most likely, the posts alerted are removed though.

[Bunny]

47. Well, I don't know what you're looking at , but right now his

profile is showing the Big Tombstone. That is in addition to the deleted messages.

[Misunderestimator]

49. You're right... he bit the dirt.

At least one sexist poster has finally been tombstoned. That's encouraging.

[MuseRider]

23. A lecture?

We are here to discuss these issues and to try to find ways to help ourselves and others with these things. If you do not like what someone perceives as a sexist issue you come in and lecture them? How do you expect any of us with varied issues, experiences, age to come to any kind of understanding if we can't talk without someone coming in to lecture us?

See my post below, I did not see it as a sexist issue, different experience than others. Just gave my little input and if someone wants to discuss it with me fine. This is how we learn and grow. I think every single one of us has been lectured about being too "emotional" too many times. Each one of us IS a collection of stories and experience.

Each of us is at a different level of understanding and we are here as a community to help each other. Is that OK? Read the mission statement.

[Name removed]

30. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Finder]

32. I wonder too

and like you, my posts are pounced upon sometimes. I think a few here have had to deal with what are called "disruptors" so many times in the past that they are hesitant to trust. I happen to agree with you on a few points and that was the reason I was excited this group was forming. It is still a fairly new group so maybe we all just need to get to know each other better. There are a number in the group who do consider what you say but know better than to take sides.

Have you posted in the main forums at all yet?

[Ripley]

33. Why are you agreeing with a tombstoned troll?

Didn't you notice all of his deleted messages? That should give you a clue.

[Finder]

34. I didn't know they were tombstoned

Must have happened while I was posting.

[Ripley]

35. This was the second tombstoning of him.

I find it highly revealing that you agreed with him.

[Finder]

36. "Revealing"?

uh oh, my turn.lol

Seriously--I wish you would pm me so I can understand why you seem to distrust me.

[Misunderestimator]

50. Good point!

:thumbsup:

[Ripley]

24. The solution to sexism is not for all females to CHANGE.

The fucking solution is for sexist men and women to stop that shit that should be socially unacceptable but some think it is cute or something.

"The solution has to come from within you" my fucking ass.

Tell me how sexist people will stop being sexist because I just don't get offended anymore by it?

You have broken every rule there is about this group. Adios.

[Name removed]

37. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Misunderestimator]

25. I missed whatever it is you said....

And I assume it's shaman who said it.

Since my original response to you was deleted, let me share this link that was in it:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=229&topic_id=10&mesg_id=59


"I see a lot of whiny victim posts here (in this section). I know that irks you immensely but that's what I'm reading here. If you want to dive deeper into this issue you're going to have to face up to the victimhood. It's being put in you face so often because it needs to be seen and acknowledged. Yeah, you see it, but you don't receive it as being something you are creating.... it's THEM out there! It's their fault I'm this way!

Let go of the victimization and you will start seeing movement on equal pay and gender prejudice issues. Keep it on the back burner and you will keep getting the comments you're getting. No movement.

Why not start a thread about gender prejudice and make a rule that no one is allowed to post anything that makes a victim of themselves or others. That would be a start... and quite possibly a very short thread."


Why do you ONLY post in the Women's and Feminist Groups? And why are your posts all attacking women and feminism... since you joined last year? Seriously... I want to know.

[Name removed]

38. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Misunderestimator]

48. Damn... I missed it again...

Has this person been banned yet?

[Ripley]

51. You missed a bizarre situation yesterday.

That poster was tombstoned like three times. Very strange... the profile had a tombstone, then he would start posting again. I emailed Skinner and he took care of it.

It was like Night of the Living Dead in here! :scared:

[Misunderestimator]

52. Yeah... I saw yours and Bunny's posts above...

very odd. :shrug:

Probably best I missed it though... would have pissed me off. Glad you emailed skinner. :hi:

[SemiCharmedQuark]

9. No, I agree with you.

The whole referring to vehicles, appliances, etc. as female irritates the hell out of me. "I rode the ol' girl all night...he he he." And that seems to be the same thing.

[noamnety]

15. I've never seen the show

So the context isn't something I can comment on.

But linguistically, there are so many languages that use male or female genders for inanimate objects, it wouldn't surprise me if it's a carry-over from that.

[chicaloca]

26. But then why...

would ALL inanimate objects in English be referred to as "she"? If that claim were true, we'd refer to some objects as males, others as females, and others as "it". Logically, they'd be called by the gender their language of origin calls them. (For instance, if we got the word "hospital" from Spanish, and it's masculine in Spanish, we'd refer to hospitals as "he".) Furthermore, in Dutch, one of the English language's closest relatives, there _are_ no female nouns. It only has male and neuter. Given that, it would be likely we'd have _more_ nouns in English that are assigned a masculine article, since most of English's other close relatives (French, Spanish, German) divide gendered articles about evenly (and German also has neuter "das" nouns along with the masculine "der" and feminine "die".)

[MuseRider]

20. I have heard that term all my life

and I never once thought about it more than as a phrase. D'OH! Seriously, in my little redneck home growing up in Kansas everything was a female. The car, tools just everything. To me it was just one more thing, just something to get done and I never, ever thought of it in terms of "doing her". I am not in disagreement just a little astonished that something like that flew past me all these years. Hmmmm. I am not certain that is the meaning or intention of that phrase but if it offends a group of people then it should not be used. Interesting.