Zorro
Zorro's JournalCorporation for Public Broadcasting to shut down following Trump budget cuts
Source: USA Today
The Corporation for Public Broadcasting announced on Aug. 1 that it was starting an “orderly wind-down of its operations” weeks after Congress passed a measure that clawed back more than $1 billion in funds to the organization.
The corporation disperses federal funds to NPR and PBS. President Donald Trump called for the outlets’ federal funding to be pulled in May, saying “neither entity presents a fair, accurate or unbiased portrayal of current events to taxpaying citizens.”
Corporation for Public Broadcasting employees were told on Aug. 1 that most staff positions would be slashed as the fiscal year ends on Sept. 30. Some staff would remain through January 2026 to “ensure a responsible and orderly closeout of operations,” according to the corporation’s news release.
“Public media has been one of the most trusted institutions in American life, providing educational opportunity, emergency alerts, civil discourse, and cultural connection to every corner of the country,” Corporation for Public Broadcasting President and CEO Patricia Harrison said. “We are deeply grateful to our partners across the system for their resilience, leadership, and unwavering dedication to serving the American people.”
Read more: https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2025/08/01/corporation-for-public-broadcasting-shutting-down/85477601007/
Alan Dershowitz Suing Martha's Vineyard Farmer's Market Vendor For Tortious Withholding Of Dumpling
He kept his panties on the whole time!If there’s one thing anybody knows about famed lawyer Alan Dershowitz’s life and career, it’s that he has panties on, except for all the times he’s being a nudist, which by definition implies the absence of panties. One time he definitely always had panties on? When he was getting a massage at Jeffrey Epstein’s Haus of Naked. That’s a five-alarm-panty-party for Alan Dershowitz, he has always assured us.
Another time Alan Dershowitz is always wearing panties — at least as far as we’ve heard — is when he’s having his civil rights and his bill of rights and his human rights violated by the evil shopkeepers and librarians of Martha’s Vineyard, where nobody will invite him over for dinner because they hate his guts, avec ou sans panties. Apparently the Jewish Democrats on Martha’s Vineyard really loathe El Chico Desnudo. Also everybody else on Martha’s Vineyard hates him, all the other liberals, and this makes Alan Dershowitz feel lonely and, well, naked. They won’t let him come to brunch, and it’s definitely not because he’s naked and won’t stop dipping his balls in the hollandaise, why would he dip his balls there, that’s not where Alan Dershowitz’s balls go. They won’t let him do his world-renowned standing-room-only readings and lectures at the meeting room at the library, it is an outrage, it is a seven deadly sins, it is a violation of the Geneva Conventions. Larry David doesn’t invite him over, Barack Obama skips his birthday parties, and now he has to sue a Martha’s Vineyard farmer’s market vendor because they wouldn’t give him a dumpling.
A pierogi, to be specific. The vendor wouldn’t give him a pierogi, so now he has to show them his pierogi.
WITH PANTIES ON.
https://www.wonkette.com/p/alan-dershowitz-suing-marthas-vineyard
Oreo And Reese's Team Up To Sicken Dogs
EAST HANOVER, NJ—Unveiling a much-anticipated collaboration they said fans have long been waiting for, the makers of Oreo and Reese’s announced Thursday that the two iconic brands of sweets had teamed up to sicken dogs.
“The savory, aromatic peanut butter of our new treat lures the dogs in, while the chocolate coating and cookie pieces poison them,” said Oreo spokesperson Tracy King, adding that both Oreo Reese’s Cookies and Reese’s Oreo Cups were perfect for leaving on the edge of the kitchen table just within reach of your pet.
“It’s Oreos and Reese’s like you’ve never seen them before: being pumped out of your dog’s stomach at a costly vet appointment. The beloved snacks are a natural pairing, because Oreos make dogs sick and Reese’s also make dogs sick. These things are loaded with so much chocolate they could take down a Great Dane. Your dog will want to eat the whole bag, but may be violently ill and forced to leave a few for you!”
In a press release, Oreo and Reese’s announced the tagline for the new product is “We will kill your dog.”
https://theonion.com/oreo-and-reeses-team-up-to-sicken-dogs/
Harris tells Colbert, in first interview out of office, that the U.S. system is 'broken'
In her first interview since losing the election to President Trump and leaving office, former Vice President Kamala Harris told Stephen Colbert on “The Late Show” that her decision not to run for California governor was more “basic” than saving herself for a “different office” — which is to say, another run for president in 2028.
After years of being a “devout public servant,” Harris said in the interview, set to air Thursday night, she just doesn’t want to be “in the system” right now.
“Recently I made the decision that I just — for now — I don’t want to go back in the system,” she said. “I think it’s broken.”
She said that was not to take away from the important work being done every day by “so many good people who are public servants,” such as teachers, firefighters, police officers and scientists.
“It’s not about them,” she said. “But you know, I believe, and I always believed, that as fragile as our democracy is, our systems would be strong enough to defend our most fundamental principles. And I think right now that they’re not as strong as they need to be.”
https://www.latimes.com/politics/story/2025-07-31/kamala-harris-in-first-interview-since-leaving-office-says-american-system-is-broken
Republicans broke it and we're all paying the price.
Mom visited her kid at juvenile hall and brought fentanyl along, authorities say
A woman was arrested on suspicion of attempting to bring fentanyl into a Los Angeles youth facility while visiting her child, according to a release from the Los Angeles County Probation Department.
Jeny Morenoparra, 42, was initially arrested in 2023 during a visit to the Barry J. Nidorf Juvenile Hall in Sylmar after a supervising deputy probation officer found her in possession of more than 30 pills that contained fentanyl, according to an additional release from the Los Angeles County district attorney’s office.
Soon after the arrest, she was released while authorities reviewed the case, the department said. In May, L.A. County Dist. Atty. Nathan Hochman said in a statement that he reopened the case and filed an arrest warrant for Morenoparra.
“Fentanyl is too dangerous a threat — 50 times stronger than heroin and 100 times stronger than morphine — to not treat its lethality with the seriousness and immediacy it requires,” Hochman said.
https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2025-07-31/fentanyl-youth-facility-mother
MAGA Mother of the Year?
Trump freezes $200 million in UCLA science and medical research funding, citing antisemitism
The Trump administration has frozen hundreds of science, medical and other federal grants to UCLA worth nearly $200 million, citing the university’s alleged “discrimination” in admissions and failure to “promote a research environment free of antisemitism.”
The decision to pull funding comes after Atty. Gen.Pam Bondi and the Justice Department said this week that UCLA would pay a “heavy price” for acting with “deliberate indifference” to the civil rights of Jewish and Israeli students who complained of antisemitic incidents since the Oct. 7, 2023, Hamas attack on Israel, Israel’s ensuing war in Gaza and campus protests the events spurred last year.
The cancellation of grants is the first large-scale targeted funding claw-back against UCLA under the Trump administration. Until now, the White House has largely focused its attempts to remake higher education on elite East Coast schools such as Columbia, Brown and the University of Pennsylvania. Each has reached deals with the government in recent weeks over issues including admissions, Jewish student life, student discipline, antisemitism training and gender identity in sports.
In a letter to UCLA Chancellor Julio Frenk dated Wednesday, the National Science Foundation wrote that it was terminating grants because “the University of California – Los Angeles continues to engage in race discrimination including in its admissions process, and in other areas of student life.”
https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2025-07-31/trump-freezes-nih-nsf-funding-ucla
Anything and everything to fuck with California.
Friday is 'Hulk Hogan Day in Florida'; flags ordered flown at half staff
Friday, per Gov. Ron DeSantis’ order, will be “Hulk Hogan Day in Florida” and flags will fly at half staff to honor pro wrestler and Florida resident Hulk Hogan, who died last week from a heart attack at his home in Clearwater Beach.
The wrestler spent much of his life in Florida and appeared with DeSantis recently and at the Republican National Convention last year in Milwaukee, endorsing Donald Trump.
Hogan, born Terry Bollea, started wrestling in 1977 and eventually became a two-time WWE hall of famer. He was banned from WWE from 2015-2018 after it was discovered that he used racial slurs.
The 71-year-old owned Hogan’s Hangout in Clearwater Beach, among other ventures such as Real American Beer.
https://floridaphoenix.com/briefs/friday-is-hulk-hogan-day-in-florida-flags-ordered-flown-at-half-staff/
Kristi Noem And The Horseback Adultery Death Camp Vacation
It’s the worst Nancy Drew mystery ever!Why is Director of Homeland Security Kristi Noem riding horses through fields in Argentina with her rumored lover, Corey Lewandowski, and posting multiple vacation-ad-style videos about it, while strings swell in the background?
Caption: “My first time riding an Argentinian bred horse— her name is ‘Abundance’— she reaffirmed that no hour of life is wasted that is spent in the saddle!”
Ah, the horse’s breeding. “So you’re saying traits can be bred?” is a favorite just-asking-questions attempted gotcha from pro-eugenics types, who also fantasize about putting down undesirables in a gravel pit. On-brand for a lady whose official government account keeps Tweeting out literal white-supremacist propaganda.
But why is the nose job in charge of homeland security more than 4,000 miles away from the homeland she’s supposed to be securing? Officially, Noem was there to work on a plan to allow Argentine tourists and businessespeople to travel to the US for up to 90 days without a visa again, and to share more information between the US and Argentina about criminals, which sounds like it could have been an email and a Zoom call.
But there she was in person, lending some of her strip-mall glamor to Trumpish President Javier Milei, mutton-chopped darling of the conservative world, who has always generously lavished praise on Trump. And he’s a pal of Elon Musk, visiting him often and gifting him that pimped-out chainsaw he swanged around on stage at the Conservative Political Action Committee, probably while in a k-hole. Custom chainsaws are Milei’s bit, and he looks like he should be chasing a maid around a table with one while Yakety Sax is playing.
https://www.wonkette.com/p/kristi-noem-and-the-horseback-adultery
Hegseth team lashes out at Pentagon's internal 'Signalgate' review
The attack on the Defense Department inspector general appears designed to undermine the inquiry’s legitimacy — even before its findings are made public.Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth’s team on Tuesday denounced the Pentagon’s internal review of his actions in the “Signalgate” affair, calling the independent inquiry “clearly a political witch hunt” and asserting without evidence that details of the nonpartisan review were leaked to the news media by “Biden administration holdovers.”
The remarks appeared in a written statement by Pentagon spokesman Sean Parnell, who also acknowledged for the first time publicly that Hegseth has provided a statement to the Defense Department inspector general’s team that makes clear his belief that “this entire exercise is a sham, conducted in bad faith and with extreme bias.”
The choice of words — “witch hunt” — borrows from language invoked by President Donald Trump when his actions have faced scrutiny and appears to be a preemptive strike designed to undermine the review’s legitimacy even before the inspector general’s findings are released publicly. That could happen within weeks.
The inspector general review, requested on a bipartisan basis by Sens. Roger Wicker (R-Mississippi), chairman of the Senate Armed Services Committee, and Jack Reed (Rhode Island), the committee’s top Democrat, is expected to dissect the degree to which Hegseth and his team followed Defense Department policy while using unclassified, commercial messaging applications, especially Signal, for official business.
https://wapo.st/3Hcq0H3
Hit dog hollers.
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